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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

So what is the point of Health Visitors?

455 replies

wonderstuff · 18/10/2010 14:43

I've seen 3 so far, they all seem very nice, but really not very useful.

Today lovely lady came by, did PND questionnaire, weighed my baby. Talked about weaning - advised that some babies (especially boys) are ready for weaning at 4 months, to be aware of him taking interest in us eating Hmm couldn't give any advise about BLW as no reseach has been done and she doesn't want to get sued - fair enough, but seemed strange that on the weaning age she was willing to contradict research evidence. She also warned of 'missing weaning window at 6 months' I didn't ask what would happen - will I end up bfeeding forever, Little Britain style? Told me breastfeeding was tiring (there was me thinking it was the lack of sleep that was knackering but presumbably if I bottle fed I'd have much more energy?) She stayed for half an hour.

Really what is the point - could money be better spend on Midwifery or Social care?

OP posts:
Original poster
wonderstuff · 18/10/2010 18:49

To be fair I have never felt a HV was checking up or judging my house. The HV who did my pre-visit said she had never in 20 years made a referal to SS without discussing with the mother.

OP posts:
MaMoTTaT · 18/10/2010 18:54

oh god my HV had to climb over the mess on the floor and dump some extra stuff on the floor (off the sofa) just to sit down with me 2 years ago Blush

She didn't bat an eyelid Smile

Miffster · 18/10/2010 18:57

MaMoTTaT - no, I will self-refer. I've done it before when I had PTSD after a life threatening event. I know the signs of PND because I have had PTSD before. So does my DH.

I'd rather not feel obliged to have someone round my house after I've just had a baby, to have to wait about for them, or tidy up for them, or have tea with them, or answer their questions. It is likely to wind me up enormously and be an extra pressure.

If I need help, I really do know where to get help. If I point this out, it ought to be accepted and I ought to be left alone, surely?

cakewench · 18/10/2010 18:58

What? They aren't allowed to discuss formula feeding, even when directly asked by a new mum? I thought they were able to do so when asked? (ie, not to promote it themselves, but to answer the question properly if it's posed to them)

As someone who was eventually able to successfully BF (and did so for 1+ year- only saying this to head off people assuming I've got some pro-FF agenda here!) that is SHOCKING. Surely the point is to make sure the baby is healthy. Why would you leave someone to sort out formula feeds for themselves, when there are so many things to learn about sterilising, proper temperature and whatnot (okay I know nothing but that's my point!) From what I recall from my antenatal classes, you can't even go by what your mum might tell you because the formula is different now.

What the hell is the point of having this person in the house if she isn't going to actually help?

jaffacake2 · 18/10/2010 19:00

Another great thread about HVs keep going girls and soon there will be no more out there.
Hooray ! You might all say because some of you dont need them.
But think about it. Every new baby in the country has an assessment by a HV. This picks up on those living in awful houses,drug addicts,violence and just horrible abusive parents who shouldnt have a pet let alone a baby.
Majority of referrals for under 5s to social services are from HVs. Who would pick up on these children?
Ive got a caseload of 500 families inner city,waiting on 4 court cases and know my intervention saved 2 babies lives this year.
But all Hvs are crap arent they?

plus3 · 18/10/2010 19:04

Memoo I wasn't suggesting that at all. But the area of Cardiff that I did my HV placement in had alot of issues with social housing, money issues, repeated hospital admissions for the children with respiratory diseases, social isolation for women who didn't have english as a first language... I could go on. I am not suggesting that these people were in any way bad parents, but they had (perhaps) bigger challenges facing them then wondering when to start weaning.

tiredemma · 18/10/2010 19:07

I had a wonderful HV for both my boys, and I was fortunate to have her as a mentor when I was a student nurse. It always grates on me when I see negative sweeping generalisations on here about HV's. This team worked in a very deprived area with a challenging caseload.

I think for those that need some support in the early years, they can be a Godsend.

Miffster · 18/10/2010 19:08

So because some people are at risk, everyone has to have visits and get checked out? Why? That seems like a massive waste of resources.

samay · 18/10/2010 19:10

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Message withdrawn

jaffacake2 · 18/10/2010 19:11

Miffster, most parents will get a new birth visit and then invited to a clinic with Hv phone number if need extra advise. This is the core HV service in our area. Is it really that intrusive ?

samay · 18/10/2010 19:15

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Message withdrawn

Miffster · 18/10/2010 19:17

I don't know why I am having such a strong reaction to the idea that I have to let a stranger into my house to check me and my baby out, but I am. I am quite happy to take the baby (and myself) to the GP for checks. having made an appointment.

That seems to be a way of having appropriate boundaries and everyone knowing where they stand.

I am just not cool about the idea that, aged 39, having recently given birth, with a 42 year old DH, both of us professionals, used to our own space and to being responsible adults who can make tough decisions and access help when needed, I suddenly have to let a stranger into my home to 'inspect' me and the baby and to 'give me advice' ( which I have not asked for) and to ask me questions.

It just feels all wrong.

jaffacake2 · 18/10/2010 19:18

Samay- clearly one off the planet!
Cant understand why she would do that.Theres always odd people in all jobs unfortunately.

samay · 18/10/2010 19:19

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HappySeven · 18/10/2010 19:22

I know there are some good ones out there but sadly some poor ones give the others a bad name. My first one kept insisting I wasn't bonding with my son and I feel contributed to my PND with her comments.

With my second HV my dd wasn't on the weight chart and I was told that she might be if we used the new charts based on breastfed babies. I said I'd downloaded a copy and she was still off the bottom and the HV said she hadn't actually seen one. I just found it sad that she hadn't even googled them to find a copy and have a look at one as surely it was relevant to her job.

Don't give up, jaffacake2, I'm sure you're advise is invaluable and know my sister has found her HV brilliant and very supportive.

SuchProspects · 18/10/2010 19:22

Miffster - that was exactly my reaction!

The article you linked to is 6 years old. As far as I'm aware, and I did a lot of reading about it, it is not common practice for HVs to report people to SS just because they were refused entry. And if it make your feel any better, I certainly haven't heard anything more about it since I told them they couldn't visit last year.

jaffacake2 · 18/10/2010 19:22

Miffster- did you feel the same about visits from community midwives?

HappySeven · 18/10/2010 19:24

Aargh!! "your advice" not "you're advise"! Shouldn't type while distracted!

samay · 18/10/2010 19:24

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Message withdrawn

allmychoicesaretaken · 18/10/2010 19:26

Miffster - I take it you will be refusing the midwives access to your home post delivery as well?

jaffacake2 · 18/10/2010 19:27

Samay- just decline the service it really wont be a problem,you clearly have resources to access private paediatrician and dont need an HV.

nameymcnamechange · 18/10/2010 19:27

I saw a great, supportive HV after I'd had ds (my second child). I took him to the baby clinic to get him weighed at 4 weeks and she spotted that I was feeling like shite over his colic, put her arms round me and let me have a little weep and came to visit me at home the following week. I can't remember how the conversation went.

I have full middle class older mum in a good area very well clued up about childcare credentials, but the emotional support she offered me on those two occasions were most gratefully received and I did not go on to develop pnd.

Miffster · 18/10/2010 19:27

I'm wondering why I am so wound up about 'intrusive' HVs coming into my home and asking me q's.

Maybe it is because I am 32 weeks pregnant and defensive of my territory.

Maybe it is because I am older, used to being an adult and not having my decisions questioned, and not needing to accept 'help' and 'advice' and just getting on with things.

Maybe it is because I am used to solving my own problems and accessing my own help and getting my own needs met.

Maybe it is because when I truthfully told a midwife I'd had PTSD in the past, for entirely non-pregnancy related reasons, (a life-threatening incident several years ago where lots of people travelling with me on a train were badly injured and some died) - she referred me to the mental health services! And I had to go through a ridiculously long interview and answer all sorts of pointless personal questions, which was a complete waste of everyone's time.

The last thing I want, after that, is a judging stranger in my home asking me questions. I've learned my lesson and that is why I do not want a HV in my home.

I want my boundaries respected and pregnancy and new parenthood seem to be a time when that often doesn't happen.

Hmmm, I think I had better leave the thread.

Miffster · 18/10/2010 19:29

Thanks for the advice though, sorry to hijack it a bit with my personal space/boundaries issues!

jaffacake2 · 18/10/2010 19:34

Miffster- hope all goes well for you and if you ever need to phone or visit the clinic please try it. It might be positive after all. Good luck.