To feel a bit strange about this?

[flibbertigibbert]

DP told me that his mum is going into hospital for a couple of days so he would be going stay and look after her (FIL isn't around). He then asked me if I wanted to stay and keep him company for the couple of days she is in hospital. DP hasn't told me what's wrong with her - he just said it's a routine operation.

AIBU to feel a bit strange about going and enjoying her nice house whilst she's in hospital having an operation? Especially when I don't know what she's having done? And AIBU to feel a little hurt that DP didn't say what the operation was? I probably am, and it's none of my business, but it just seems strange when we've been together so long (5 years).

I wouldn't feel hurt that I didn't know what her operation is for - it might be embarrassing for her. Your dh may not even know.

If it really bothers you, then ask.

Do you get on with her? Either go and help look after her, or stay at yours and enjoy a few days on your own.

You're over-thinking this!

Why didn't you ask? Your DP might be wondering why you haven't shown more concern.

I asked whether it was serious, how long recovery was etc, so i did show concern, but DP was very dismissive when I brought it up.

The idea was that I would stay in the house whilst she is in hospital, not when she's back home. I do get on with her, though we're not close - because of geographical distance I only see her once every few months.

You DPs mum must know he's stopping over and that you might go along too, she might even be pleased someone's at the house while she's not there.

I don't see it as 'enjoying' her house, you're just stopping there to keep your DP company.

It sounds like you feel like you're intruding, I know what you mean, but you're not doing anything underhand, unless you're thinking of selling her house while she's in hospital

If it is an 'embarassing' op, she may be glad of the opportunity of having another female to talk it over with, rather than her son.

I would still ask what it was exactly though.

Do ask ... but it sounds as if your DP really wants you nearby for support, rather than asking you to 'enjoy' yourself while she's in hospital. Would she perhaps have asked him not to say what it is, if she's embarrassed?