to think that by the time a boy is 16 he should have grown out of childish food foibles

[OrmRenewed]

and not be still refusing to eat vegetables.

DH's nephew btw. We went to SIL's 50th at the weekend Other SIL and her children were there and MIL. Nephew is DH's younger sisters youngest. He was never a particularly fussy eater but never keen on veg. Sunday we had a big family meal together. Nephew made a complete pig of himself - he helped himself to loads of meat and veg but his mum was still having to force him to eat a few french beans and one tiny carrot He then had another huge helping of meat and spuds.

I don't think that at nearly 17 any child should need their parents telling them what to eat and he should buck up his ideas and start to take responsibility for his own dietary health?

He's a bit of a porker btw but still growing and very tall so it doesn't seem so bad. But I'd be prepared to put any money on him getting seriously fat once he stops growing.

And no, of course it doesn't matter to me at all . But AIBU to feel that if my DC aren't able to take some responsibility for what they put in their mouths at that age I will be very disappointed?

You'd think wouldn't you.
But many adults are like this.

I lived with a girl at university who ate the following things and the following things only:

Spaghetti with cheese on top (mild cheddar only, no other cheese allowed, not even medium cheddar)

Spaghetti with spaghetti hoops on top

Cheese toasties (again mild cheddar only) and only once I hat taught her to make them.

Cheese and tomato pizza.

Chicken nuggets. Onlyif she went to McDonalds or something, she never cooked them herself.

I'm amazed she was alive. She never drank anything other than orange juice mixed with lemonade either.

I often wondered what on earth her parents had been doing.

I think at 16 his mother should leave him alone to eat in peace and not embarrass him in front of his prim and judgemental relatives.

I guess so.

Probable my problem that I find it so unattractive in adults.

Statistically the group least likely to get their '5 a day' are young males aged 17 - 25.

I am 36 yo and not a big veg eater. I do eat more now than I did when I was 16yo but tbh, would prefer to eat meat or pasta and have to force myself to eat healthy stuff too.

Your SIL was BU to fuss over him though. Why did she force him to eat the beans and the carrot?

My nephew is 16 and still only eats beige food - at a roast he will eat the inside of roasties and yorkshires. If pushed, he'll eat about 2cm square of meat. No veg at all.

Alas though, he is very short and podgy, so looks like his diet

Oh god I guess I was being very judgemental CCF.

I would hope my kids would eat veg, but teenagers are notorious junk food consumers. I think his mum should have left him alone at a public event though.

YANBU, your SIL was though. I can't abide greed in anybody, child or adult. DD would eat just meat if she could get away with it. Any sort of meat but the more highly processed the better. I get a bit cross when she tells her teacher or writes in her school books about how we live on burgers and pizza. What she fails to mention is that everything virtually that we eat is home made. I haven't worked out sausages yet though.

And here we go again with the smug 'what are the parents doing' type threads relating to food.

My dd is 9. She has serious issues around food. We are seeing medical people to help break through with them. Til then, she'll be a 'freaky eater'.

To see people on here blaming the parents makes me so angry. But it's only the same as real life I guess.

Judgemental doesn't really touch some of the responses on this thread.....

I would say we eat shockingly little veg in this house tbh.

Our meals are quite often rice/pasta with a sauce.

We have a succession of foreign students staying who eat with us - all girls. There have been 3 who literally did not like anything I cooked. Not one thing. And I tried all sorts. Very annoying if you are catering for 18 year olds seeing them turn up their noses much like DDs friends (who age 4).

I haven't eaten vegetables since the 80s due to weird food phobias and I've seen nutritionists who are unconcerned. Although I do eat lots of fruit to compensate. Not everyone can be a "normal" eater.

Our best meal in terms of veg is probably chili!

oh I dunno, I loved veg as a child and eat lots as an adult
but as a teen? unless SunnyD counted, not a lot
and I wasn't raised in a Sunny-D house, had water or apple juice growing up, and wouldn't TOUCH the stuff as an adult, but teenagers eat rubbish and are able to buy it themselves if you don't get it for them so what can you do?

God first year of uni I lived exclusively on spagetti Os on toast, lucozade and cider!

His mum is BU to try and feed him his green like a child! leave him be, he'll either grow out of it or he won't but her treating him like a toddler wont help!

I have no doubt that when DS1 is with his friends and nowhere near an adult he will eat kebabs and pizzas with the best of them and never let a green thing pass his lips . But if he wasn't prepared to eat any in front of other adults at a family meal then I'd be seriously worried. Behaviour with peers and behaviour with family is usually different (and that is quite normal IME).

And I know that there are adults that don't like veg. But generally they still understand the benefits of eating a balanced diet and will eat some.I think it was the sight of a (nearly) grown adult behaving (IMO) like a little child, that bothered me.

Plenty of adults eat incredibly poorly. At 16 it's probably easiest to leave him to it - he should be allowed to "take responsibility for his own dietary health", as you put it, and that includes not treating him like a child and cajoling him into eating a single green bean.

My astonishingly healthy 70 year old uncle is one such adult. Aside from potatoes the only vegetablea he will eat are peas.

Not attractive, possibly, but not really my business either.

I find the idea of parents coaxing a young man of the OP's nephew's age far more peculiar than his dietry habits even though I don't eat meat, fowl or fish myself.

When it comes to correct polite behaviour at a family gathering I should think that his helping himself to food he will eat without a fuss is far less irritating/disruptive than his mother nagging him to eat up his greens.

I wouldn't say it was a foible. At nearly 17 he's quite capable of knowing what he likes or doesn't like. Everyone is allowed to have food they don't like. I really don't see why it's a problem.

As a teen (student) I lived on canteen food where the vegetarian option was a fried cheap vegeburger or a jacket potato with cheese. The veg was usually diced carrot (vile) or mixed diced veg (vile). For those two years I lived on jacket potatoes, toast and Fosters.
There's only so much you can do re educating them- one day he will realise that you are what you eat.

My MIL still tells DP to eat up his veggies and he's over 30. She once told me in an all serious voice to hide the veg in with the potato or whatever. I was like you do realise he's 30 don't you? Not 5? Shall I cut up his meat while I'm at it?

YANBU. If my daughter wants to eat like that when she's 16 I'll be concerned but I'm not gonna mollycoddle her.

You know, I wonder if strapping young lads actually need as much vegetation, as a proportion of their diet, as mortals the rest of us.

A great plate of carbs and protein and fat. It's probably what they'd have been thriving on on the savannah. Although perhaps in slightly different forms.

I remember the boys at school used to spend their lunch money in the shops on a bag of chips, a pint of milk and a packet of custard creams.

YANBU to think he ought to take responsibility - but YABU to be even remotely surprised that he doesn't

"great plate of carbs" Probably not carbs. Meat yes, but stonking great piles of roast potatoes no.