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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

dogs at school gates again

146 replies

nikkershaw · 22/09/2010 08:50

fgs can people not keep them a little away from the entrance, it's not alot to ask for? we don't all want to pet your pongy pooch and i'm sick of detouring around them.

thank you

OP posts:
SkiHorseWonAWean · 22/09/2010 08:53

Why not smother yourself with cheap smelling perfume to cover the pooch smell?

Original poster
nikkershaw · 22/09/2010 08:55

huh?

OP posts:
SkiHorseWonAWean · 22/09/2010 08:58

Here, have a dog Biscuit. There's a good girl. Good girl. Siii-t! Good girl.

LinenBasket · 22/09/2010 08:59

what will they do to you?

LinenBasket · 22/09/2010 09:06

how far is the detour?

annec555 · 22/09/2010 09:08

I have some sympathy with the OP. I personally like dogs and can't ever have one due to OH's severe allergy, so I tend to pet friendly dogs.
However, I have a friend who is absolutely terrified of them, and I am also cautious about letting my 14 month old pet strange dogs. I have noticed that an awful lot of dog owners seem completely oblivious to the fact that not everyone likes dogs, some people are afraid, and most parents won't want to risk allowing a strange dog to approach their small children. We have a large green space opposite our house and often sit out there pre-bedtime to let ds work off some energy. It is surprising how many people think it is OK to allow their dog to go bounding up to a small child and then when the child's mother picks him up, to be thoroughly offended and snap "he's not going to hurt him" as though you are being completely unreasonable and offensive. We also had a lady let her large dog on an extendable lead run right up to my son and stopped him at the absolute last minute and announced "I am training him to stop before he jumps on people". Great idea - but any chance of not practicing on my child?!
We also have a very dog friendly pub near us, and a couple who have two large alsations let them lie across the doorway and tell everyone to step over them - which is all very well until you get someone who is obviously scared.
As I say, I like dogs. But I wish some dog owners would be a little more sensitive to the fact that not everyone does, particularly where children are concerned.

ditavonteesed · 22/09/2010 09:13

cor it must have been a week, have a Biscuit

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts · 22/09/2010 09:14

hear hear anne :) Couldnt have put it better myself.

i have no severe dislike to dogs, but I am wary of letting my 2yo stroke them. I have had a bad experience with a dog and it always makes me hesitate before going near one. If i walk past one in the street at close proximity i will always edge a little further away and make sure DD isnt too near.

Not everyone wants a dog sniffing their leg when walking past them!

Saggyoldclothcatpuss · 22/09/2010 09:26

I have two lovely friendly medium sized dogs. I get really pissed off when people allow small children to run up to my dogs an pet them without asking. There is no way to tell if my dogs are friendly, (they love kids) and what's to stop that child getting it's face ripped off? It's swings and roundabouts really! Common sense all round!

spikeycow · 22/09/2010 09:30

Dog owners aren't thoughtless, we are just going about our daily lives with our pets. People bringing dogs to school might be working all day and that is the only chance they get to walk the dog. Dogs are part of LIFE so either get over it or if that is too difficult get CBT or something.

assumpta · 22/09/2010 09:35

Nikkershaw - I have just got a puppy and one of the things I cannot believe is that people let their children put their faces to the puppy to lick. I don't allow my own children to do this and warn them that although lovely, they are animals and could very well nip. This is the view I had before I got a dog and it's not going to change now I have one. Perhaps the dogs could be tethered a little way from the entrance. I have never felt obliged or pressured to pet anyone elses dogs so cannot comment on how they make you feel you have to. Perhaps have a word with the school.

JaxTellersOldLady · 22/09/2010 09:39

hmm well I would love it if the 400 odd kids at my DC school didnt just smother my dog with affection without asking. My dog is a GSD and quite dark so looks 'scary' to a lot of people, he is the most affable lump you could get, and loves children, but a lot of the parents dont know that!

It astound me that people let their toddlers and older kids do this!

misdee · 22/09/2010 09:42

i occasionally take my pups on the school run. i stand away from the main crowd to get dd2 (can wave from where i stand) then walk down the other end to get the other 2 dd's. i dont venture onto the school grounds and keep the dogs on a short lesh, and try to keep them sitting.

the amount of kids who will just come up and stroke them always astounds me. i try to tell them to ask first, and to make sure the boys are sitting and not bouncing. but please teach kids not to pet strange dogs without asking owners first. i can almost guage how bouncey and excited the pups are by their behaviour. and they dont even mouth people, but do lick a lot still.

one teenage girl asked if she could stroke one the other week. but it had been rianing, ralph was covered in mud, and the girl had white jeans on. i did tell it wasnt advisable as i didnt want the cleaning bill for her jeans lol. she sawe us a few days later, and it was dry, no white jeans ,and i allowed her to make a fuss of the pup.

ChooksAway · 22/09/2010 09:57

OP I don't think yabu. I love dogs, but there is one that is always tied to the narrow school gate, that is the only way to get into the school. Everyone has to push past the dog. That's fine for me - i'm not scared of them, but several dc at the school are terrified, and it's a big dog!
The owner should have the decency to tie it along the fence so people don't have to go near if they don't want to.

assumpta · 22/09/2010 10:00

Chooksaway - I agree completely with you. Has someone asked her to do this. Not necessarily a parent, but the school principle.

DaftApeth · 22/09/2010 10:00

Luckily we don't have many dogs turn up at our school but the ones that do just tend to be mingled in with the general melee.

I completely agree that dog owners should think about where they stand in this situation. I know a few people who are absolutely terrified of dogs. Lots of little feet running around could lead to the dog being trodden on and then perhaps snapping. Saying that people who are scared of dogs should get help is a little like saying if you don't like loud music from a car/next door neighbour, just put your fingers in your ears.

Equally, I agree that parents must teach their children not to touch any dog that happens to be around.

So, a bit of respect and common sense from both sides seems sensible.

spikeycow · 22/09/2010 10:03

If you are a hysteric and whinge about aspects of normal life then you need help. People are scared of all sorts of things, life doesn't grind to a halt for everyone else because of it.

ChooksAway · 22/09/2010 10:05

Assumpta - yes she has been asked to tie it up away from the gate, but she just replies that it is a friendly dog and never going to hurt anyone. When pointed out (by a teacher) that some dc are scared, the owner said that she had to be able to see the dog (which she couldn't if it was tied up further down) and that it wasn't her problem if some dc were silly enough to be scared!

She's also a stroppy headstrong governor at the school, which I suppose makes it more difficult to get her to toe the line.

assumpta · 22/09/2010 10:17

It shouldn't matter who she is, in fact, not only should she know better, maybe it is something that could be brought up at a governors meeting. If she cannot see him when leaving him in an appropriate place she should leave it in the car, safely, for a couple of minutes or go and collect him after the school run. It's not rocket science!

DaftApeth · 22/09/2010 10:24

I don't think it is a case of being 'hysterical'. I think the owners should show consideration to others.

It is downright nasty inconsiderate to continue doing something that quite obviously petrifies some poeple.

It is easy to avoid parks with loose dogs, if need be, but picking up your children from school can not be avoided.

TheCoalitionNeedsYou · 22/09/2010 10:26

Dogs ARE rubbish though.

MackerelOfFact · 22/09/2010 10:26

If the dogs are on a lead, supervised, and not fouling on the pavement then YABU. You should surely prevent your DCs from touching the dogs if they trouble you, just as you stop them running into the road or any other potential dangers at the school gate.

Hold your breath as you pass them if the smell bothers you. Or go and stand with the smokers. Mmm.

spikeycow · 22/09/2010 10:28

Walking dogs can't be avoided either. If my child was shrieking for nothing I'd encourage him to stop, not enable a phobia. It's irritating when people carry on like that for no reason, and also rude. And it looks stupid

spikeycow · 22/09/2010 10:31

So we have parents encouraging phobias, shrieking, whinging about nothing. Why should these people be taken seriously? If you have a phobia, get help for it. Dogs are part of life. I hate rats but when I visit my friend who has rats in a cage I don't ask for them to be put away. People with dog phobias feel over entitled and I'm sick of it

OrmRenewed · 22/09/2010 10:33

I like dogs at the school gates. As long as they are with their owners - I ask if it's OK and then stroke the dogs and so do my DC. It brightens my day. I don't so much like to see dogs tied up alone near the gates as I'd never touch a dog in that situation - they might get scared and snappy. They should be tied up a few yards away from the gates.