to want my 5 year old to look like a 5 year old?

[SlightlyJaded]

Ok I probably am BU
And I am definitely being a snob

But... Like most 5 year olds, my dd has appalling taste and would gladly dress head to toe in Barbie themed tops, age inappropriate 'fashion' skirts / leggings etc and the more logos and glitter the better...

Now, I am not suggesting that she be permanently kitted out in Boden, Little White Company and Baby Joules (not that I can, nor would, pay £45 for a cotton skirt) and I have relented on some things like vile Disney Princess PJ's, Tinkerbell vests and pants, Hello Kitty Jeans and the like BUT my problem is that it's really hard to talk her in to nice clothes, and she really likes to come shopping and be allowed to choose sometimes.

I know it's not the end of the world, but short of explaining the concept of chavvy to her thus rendering her a complete snob (not unlike her mother) I don't know the words to use to put her off.

I have tried to tell her that things are not suitable for her age and then been blind-sided by a 3 year old with pierced ears in a pink fake fur coat strolling past

And nowhere is safe! Supermarkets, Charity Shops - even M&S seem to be full of nylon rouched tops with fricking studs on them. Any suggestions, or should I just roll over and embrace an exclusively pink, lilac and silver nylon wardrobe...??

Just be firm. You have the money, you are her mum, this is an arguement for when she is a teenager! I'm so glad I have boys because I completely agree with you. What's wrong with a nice smocked dress? I like little girls to look like little girls.

Oh you will prolly be flamed for the chav comments . But I don't like brand names, writing, fluffy princesses, nylon, glitter etc either. My DD is a whisker off four so I guess I have more control.

I don't know because taking your DD shopping then to all intents and purposes telling her that her taste is crap is not good. But I wouldn't want that wardrobe either.

How about only shopping online and letting her order on the computer? You choose the sites, she makes the final decisions?

Oh I am prepared for a flaming for using the word chavvy but that's half the problem. I don't want to say 'chavvy' or anything that suggests that I think 'those clothes are for common people' (DH is a bit of a chav actually :)) but I don't have the language to know what to say to a strong minded 5 year old who's main agenda at the moment is to look 'cool' (my fault for lettering her see too many Lelli fucking Kelly adverts)

Lelli Fecking Kelly.

DD saw the advert after Fifi last weekend. I told her she can't have them because they are trashy. She thinks that means rubbishy and accepted it .

What the hell can you say though? We don't wear clothes like that? Mummy thinks those clothes are naff? Can you imagine if you heard someone say that in a shop .

How about if you thought of a really sound reason to veto each item. Studs and glitter? Might scare the dog. Disney Princess? You can't see it on your top, I'll buy you this nice DP pencil case instead and we'll have the plain top. Think fast

Can you say that they're dressing up clothes rather than normal clothes?

Oh I'm glad it's not me that hates Lelli fucking Kelli. How can shoes being marketing by and to five year olds seem so slutty?

YANBU. I have a DD who has just turned 6 and I too have this trouble. They're naturally tacky when it comes to clothing.

The trouble is that we should not HAVE to turn to Boden etc to provide our DD's with pretty, age appropriate clothing...there SHOULD be pretty little dresses etc with nice prints availabl on the high street.

Bu you try and find one! I look all the time and there is nothing! They stop at around 24 months.

In the USA girls have the option of a nicemocked frock until they're about 11!

CUPCAKESANDBUNTING

I don't think Lelli Kelli's are slutty! They're trashy sure...but a childs SHOE being labelled slutty!? Nah.

Tell her it doesn't suit her, worked with my dd.

Oh anenome they are. Thy come with rhinestones and heels and lipgloss for 5yo children. That's a bit sleazy no?

Well at least Lelli Kelli's don't have high heels and are o.k for little feet.
I see children from the age of about 3 in high heels, earings and leather jackets. What is this world comming too?

YANBU. Can you pick two or three pieces and then ask her to choose from them?

My daughter is 5.5 but very tall. She needs an age 8 now. I find it so hard to find clothes of this size suitable for her. We tend to buy Joules, Boden and some H&M. It's a shame you have to buy these expensive brands just to let your 5 year old look like a 5 year old.

Umm - we have the opposite problem. We have a 5 year old who wants to go around dressed like a little Edwardian Miss. She only wants to wear dresses (even to the beach, for example) and the more sticky-out the better. Gets a bit chilly when the weather gets colder as she turns blue next to the girls in the faux fur coats and uggs.

Anenome, please do not capitalise my name to get my attention. It makes you look like you are shouting/rude.

They are slutty shoes. That is precisely the reason that some of us find them distasteful.

surely its very easy, i dont take my 7 year shopping at all or choose for that matter. She wears what i buy her, end of!

Okay- there is lots of unsuitable clothing out there... but there are also lots of nice things (even without paying Bonpoint type prices)

I would say the main thing is not to take her shopping with you... as 5 yo IME have the fashion sense of a crazed magpie let loose in Elizabeth Duke!

I do sometimes walk around shops with my DD present, but I always tell her I'll order it on the computer (ostensibly because it's cheaper), so I can see what she would wear if I bought it, but weed out the lolita on acid type stuff... plus I only ever take her in Gap, John Lewis, H&M, and Sainsbury's. [evil mummy emoticon]

That said... she picked out all the vile blingy t-shirts in Gap last time we went, which I honestly told her she wouldn't be getting as I didn't like them (though I'm not sure that was the right thing to do, but never mind).

She has never asked for unsuitable shoes though... but I'm probably just lucky really, as she's never seen LelliKelly adverts, as we don't have television. (She has heard of them from a school friend but I don't think said friend's descriptive skills were all that great, as she hasn't been begging for them!)

I buy stuff I like from Gap, Sainsbury, H&M, Zara, Gymboree, Boden, Vertbaudet etc, frequently from ebay too. I realise she will start wanting to exert more of an influence over her wardrobe soon, but tbh, she likes the stuff I choose, and isn't really obsessive over her appearance.

Ha! In the time it took me to type out that essay, landrover said all I needed to far more succinctly- bravo!

thankyou captain nancy, i try my best

Lol at Lolita on acid!

CUPCAKESANDBUNTING

I WAS SHOUTING. I dislike people using the word slutty in relation to 5 year olds.I am the Mother of girls and I expect people (especially women) to do something to dispel our language of words like that....

I don't believe that an item of clothing can be slutty in and of itself, the slutty aspect comes from how it makes the wearer look. So, you can't call 5 year old shoes slutty unless you're suggesting that they make the 5 year old look like a slut when she wears them.

And however sparkly the trainer, I don't think it makes any 5 year old look like they're up for sex.

I really need to hide this thread or I fear another primark padded bikini arguemetn coming on!!!! .....but before I go...

MY DD WEARS WHAT SHE BLOODY WELL LIKES - she loves clothes shoppin, has fantastic taste in clothes, she is 8 now but has been choosing her own outfits for as long as I can recall.....apart from a school uniform which is completely to the script!!!...........

And to use words such as Chavvy and slutty is quite frankly....farking awful...

I just don't ask, or if I do, I present a 'this or this' option and briskly walk past the black sparkly leggings.

At nearly seven and five, I am not letting my dd's choose inappropriate (or too expensive, other hazard of shopping with children present) clothes, I do let them keep presents with High School Musical logos on, but tell them they are for bedtime, or to wear in the house!

I'm happy to buy quite a bit, and happy for them to pick and choose each day out of what's on offer, but I don't really think at that age, unless they have great taste and understand money (neither of which they appear to have) they can choose their own clothes in shops.

Oh and...what exactly does a 5yo look like?????