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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have reported my "friend" for benefit fraud

312 replies

buttercupp · 06/09/2010 13:27

ok so cant go into too much detail for obvious reasons but i have a friend (not know for long but lives near me) and i have been debating for a while now whether to report her or not for living with her partner who is also claiming as living alone.

so today i have done it finally after being fed up of hearing what other electrical applicance they have bought with the stupid amount of money they have been given when my DH is out at work slogging his guts out just to make ends meet.

The reason i havent done it before is like i say she is supposed to be my friend,we have had nights out together and she has a baby so have felt a bit bad in that respect too but i knew i had to do the right thing.
would i be a hypocrite to continue to be her friend or should i avoid her from now on? i do like the girl just dont agree with what she was doing.and anyone know what will happen now i have reported her?

OP posts:
Drusilla · 06/09/2010 14:24

YANBU. If your friend was regulary shoplifting no-one would be complaining if she was arrested - benefit fraud is theft, just the same. dragonfly68 it doesn't matter if buttercup has got the facts wrong - if this girl is not claiming fraudulently then she has nothing to worry about.

GypsyMoth · 06/09/2010 14:26

drusilla....it does matter.....because if her benefits are stopped whilst an investigation is carried out.....how will she feed them??

and whatb about the worry it all brings??

Baileysismyfriend · 06/09/2010 14:31

Do they really stop peoples benefits while they investigate though? I would be surprised by that tbh.

massivemammaries · 06/09/2010 14:33

YANBU, you did the right thing to report her - no doubt about it.

As for weather or not you can still be her friend ..........well you could but you would have to tell her that it was you who blew the whistle and see if she still wanted the friendship.

I guess you realise that she probably won't be aware she's been reported for quite a while (up to two years) as standard practice is to investigate and build up a file on them. best to just drift apart from her now and then she'll probably never know!

EricNorthmansmistress · 06/09/2010 14:34

people on benefits can't afford to live

Yes, they can. They just can't afford much of a 'lifestyle'. Benefits pay rent, council tax, and enough to buy food, utilities and clothing for however members of the family there are. They are not for buying luxury goods or holidays or even fags and booze. I'm not trying to 'benefits bash' (have been there and done that myself) but it irritates me when people moan about how low benefits are - as if they should be providing a lifestyle rather than just feeding and clothing and keeping a roof over your head.

MistsandMellowMilady · 06/09/2010 14:34

They do.

They also stop them when you get a job and you don't know the system (happened to me) or separate from a partner even if you are caring for the children.

Have a look at the benefits board of Martin Lewis' moneysavingexpert forums.

It happens.

pearlsandtwinset · 06/09/2010 14:34

YANBU. Stealing from tax payers, many of whom are also struggling. Just lazy and spoilt (buying stuff that is unneeded. Makes me furious).
They've brought it on themselves.

GypsyMoth · 06/09/2010 14:38

people on benefits are entitled to budgetting loans....where yes,THEY PAY IT BACK WEEKLY,from the benefits. these loans can be for up to £1,000 so enough for a tv.

lisad123isgoingcrazy · 06/09/2010 14:40

TBH I wouldnt want to be friends with someone who thought stealing was a good thing to do in the first place, you did the right thing.

MistsandMellowMilady · 06/09/2010 14:42

Not saying that the benefits system when in place isn't adequate. It is.

Poverty usually hits when people try to escape it, lone parents usually and especially those with one child. Working poor couples are also hard done by.

If you have seven children it's best to stay on benefits as you have no hope of earning enough to be independent and it is better in that the DWP gives you £50 a week for each new child whereas no employer would.

Witchcat · 06/09/2010 14:46

YANBU.

You did the right thing.

Do you want to be her friend? why?

I am socked at the low moral values of some people. Stealing is stealing in every form. Would you be happy if it was £10 out of your pocket or your kids pocket money?

Just beacuse its not personal does not mean that people dont get hurt.

Mingg · 06/09/2010 14:47

YANBU

Agree witchcat - any form of stealing is stealing

ShirleyKnot · 06/09/2010 14:51

I knew it would be a massive plasma HD TV. It always is.

Oh and fags and alcohol and pre-cut fruit.

GypsyMoth · 06/09/2010 14:55

but how was the op sure??? how does she know the beneits being claimed....how does she know what they are,and arent entitled to??

surely you need to be sure before you do something like this? no?

usualsuspect · 06/09/2010 14:55

Predictable and done to death ..

Original poster
buttercupp · 06/09/2010 15:08

I am sure as i heard from the horses mouth that he was not supposed to be living in the house.He knows he is doing wrong as they have said themselves in the past they are getting paranoid about people following/watching them.

someone said it might be 2 years until something happened about it?
so what happens now then?

done to death? sorry i dont use mumsnet much so didnt realise

OP posts:
Original poster
buttercupp · 06/09/2010 15:08

I am sure as i heard from the horses mouth that he was not supposed to be living in the house.He knows he is doing wrong as they have said themselves in the past they are getting paranoid about people following/watching them.

someone said it might be 2 years until something happened about it?
so what happens now then?

done to death? sorry i dont use mumsnet much so didnt realise

OP posts:
Original poster
buttercupp · 06/09/2010 15:08

I am sure as i heard from the horses mouth that he was not supposed to be living in the house.He knows he is doing wrong as they have said themselves in the past they are getting paranoid about people following/watching them.

someone said it might be 2 years until something happened about it?
so what happens now then?

done to death? sorry i dont use mumsnet much so didnt realise

OP posts:
Original poster
buttercupp · 06/09/2010 15:09

oh dear something went very wrong with my computer sorry!Blush

OP posts:
MistsandMellowMilady · 06/09/2010 15:11

That happens a lot too, don't worry about it Smile

Witchcat · 06/09/2010 15:12

My BIL is a benefits fraud investergator and if you have a suspiouon (sp?) of benefit fraud then you can report it.

They have to have evidence to take a case to court and if she is not commiting fraud than no action will be taken.

Its not the OP job to know 100% if its true or not before reporting her and most people make sure that they know for sure before they report it cos the people who get caught normal tell their friends and family what they are doing for some strange reason!

onadietcokebreak · 06/09/2010 15:15

YANBU......

MoreSpamThanGlam · 06/09/2010 15:15

I know of several banks that are using massive loopholes to do us out of money as takpayers.

Who do I report them to? Wink

usualsuspect · 06/09/2010 15:16

So its ok to go around reporting people on benefits ,who have electrical appliances ,just on the off chance Hmm ..best hide my tv and dvd player and cover up my sky dish if I ever have to claim benefits then

BitOfFun · 06/09/2010 15:16

Can't we have a separate section for these threads?