Was I unreasonable to let my mum drive 3 year old 1/2 a mile with no car seat?

[BurningBuntingFlipFlop]

I'm not very well atm and this morning I was altogether rubbish so my mum offered to drop my ds of at nursery as she practically passes our hous on the way to work. She was running a bit late so I just ran out with ds and put him in the front with a seatbelt on. She drove the half a mile around the corner and as she stopped a random father at the nursery started having a massive go at her in front of ds, saying she was endangering his life etc. My mum was mortified, she called ne when she got to work and was nearly in tears.

So was i bu? It's not against the law btw, I checked.

No I think the father was. The exception in the law is precisely for circumstances like you had today. If you had driven you may well have been more likely to have a crash, which would have been worse even if your DC had been in a child seat.

Ideally you would have given her your child seat as well. Some parents are a bit over the top.

certainly not ideal, but man to re-act like this seems a bit ott.

I have done this, it's not ideal, but sometimes you have to go with the best non-ideal solution.

it isn't something i would have done personally, but i wouldn't berate anyone else for doing it if they had to

do you not have a car seat?

Are you sure it is not illegal? I thought small children had to have the correct stage carseat by law,unless its an actual emergency?
The problem is, no matter how short the journey, you cannot predict or control ANY OTHER ROAD USER, so it is indeed risking your childs life. No matter how shite a parent felt from being ill, imagine how much worse you would feel if your child got injured/killed as a direct result of not taking three mins to clip the carseat in.

While I have often had children in the car for short journeys without a car seat - I would NEVER put them in the front seat without one

Yeah of course I have a carseat but as she was running late and the nursery was so close I didn't really think it was necessary to unstrap it out of my car and into mum's. I was also feeling awful and holding screaming baby dd and my mum wouldn't have the first idea how to strap it in. And seriously, it is so close. It's not something I have done before.

My first thought would be that if it was such a small inconsequential distance, why on earth would she need to drive it?

mmm I am on the fence on this one.

Could you not have transferred your seat to your mum's car, or just swapped cars for the day?

I suppose in a dire emergency, it's not the end of the world, but ordinarily, I wouldn't consider it.

I think the law is that you can be without a car seat if there isn't one available. Which is bloody obvious actually. Probably the back seat would be safer, but that isn't always an option is it? He was strapped in, you did what you could. Don't let it worry you.

Get well soon, and remember: if your parents were anything like mine, you went through your childhood without a seat let alone a carseat. Visions of three kids in the back of a Morris Traveller .....

So it wasn't an emergency. Being late is not an emergency.

Yes YABU. There's never an excuse to take a risk with a child in car, no matter how small it seems at the time.

However, the guy was wrong to start shouting at your Mum in front of your DS. Not because she was right in what she was doing, but it would have frightened your DS and that's not on.

"not the end of the world" - it could have been, which is why OP was BU

I would have put the car seat in the car - it only takes a couple of minutes to put a seat in. Your mum could have held the screaming baby whilst you strapped the seat in.

Better late than dead or seriously injured.

1/2 a mile, why couldn't you walk? You are clearly not that unwell or you would be in bed asleep and not posting on MN trying to feel less guilty about something you know is totally unreasonable. Only you know whether or not the journey was necessary, you have to answer to yourself.

Under these circs, I would probably have given your mum the car seat, or told her to get it from your car. However, presumably the man didn't know (a) that she was your mum, or (b) that she had come direct from your house, so it was completely out of order for him to shout, let alone in front of your DS.

An older child won't spontaneously combust just because they're not in a car seat for a short journey - either because someone else is giving them a lift, they are in a taxi or whatever.

Does anyone know at what age the law changes - I think it's illegal to have a baby in a car without a car seat, and clearly once they are at school and getting lifts from other parents etc then they may not always be in a seat, but this sort of age is a grey area.

It was a bit much for the man to have a go, but it was an unnecessary risk to take. Why put him in the front as well, surely the back would have been safer?

no grey area at all bramshot the law is very clear - OP was breaking it as this was not an "emergency" (ie trip to A&E, broken down and need to send someone else to collect Dc from school)

yes, i would have used your own car seat. and in the bck of the car

i think you were taking unnecesary risks tbh

[[http://www.childcarseats.org.uk/law/index.htm car seat laws here]