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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Paying for other people's holidays

141 replies

woodstonobserver · 26/08/2010 21:22

I was going on holiday next week to a Spain to a villa that sleeps six with my daughter, a girlfriend and her daughter. Girls only, no blokes allowed!

Holiday was all paid for, but due to family difficulties my girlfriend and her daughter pulled out last week.

Phoned up holiday company and was told that it would cost £30 to change the name on the ticket and that extra tickets were £250. Was told it might be more nearer the time.

Didn't want to be by myself with my daughter on holiday so offered "free" tickets to another girlfriend and her daughter. Her daughter then wanted to bring her boyfriend, age 14, and his mum wanted to come along as well.

So suddenly we had six people, two of whom I have only met a couple of times. Told them the holiday company needed passport details before accepting bookings, and that the extra flights would need to be paid for. The boyfriend needed to get a passport. Finally got all the details and phoned holiday company.

They told me it was now £275 to change a name on a ticket and extra flights were now £500. So suddenly it would cost £550 to change 2 names and £1000 to buy two extra tickets, total £1550.

Told the holiday company to forget it and told my friend we had left it too late. I planned to go by myself with my daughter, bit sad I know, but not worth paying those prices.

Since then been subjected to a torrent of abuse to the effect that I had promised them a holiday and that I now had to provide them with said holiday no matter how much it cost.

My reply to my friend was that whilst I might be able to pay for her and daughter, I most certainly was not going to pay for her daughter's boyfriend and his mum!

Major row taking place tonight! Why should I pay for my friend's daughters's boyfriend and his mum?

Why can't his dad pay?

Am I being unreasonable?

Amy xx

OP posts:
Tippychoocks · 26/08/2010 21:48

You are a little silly to have paid anything towards their tickets IMO.
They sound horrible.

PaulineCampbellJones · 26/08/2010 21:49

Cheeky buggers! Don't do it, they are rotten.

woodstonobserver · 26/08/2010 21:50

Feeling very stupid now and, as you say, very "mug" like. Cost of flights for other mum work out at about £300 but being a weekday are not direct but via Madrid. That is "not acceptable". She also says that the boyfriend's mum is necessary to look after the two kids. She also says I can't let the kids down as they are so excited about their holiday. I replied "they are not my kids so not my problem" also, "why can't their dads pay" - not good answers to put forward tonight!

Good advice SHA! And DMAF!

Villa is there and paid for. My flight is paid for and so is my daughter's. Just wanted some company in Mallorca!

OP posts:
kingbeat23 · 26/08/2010 21:51

Why would you want to be stuck abroad with people like that now??

No, sorry flight compnay called and can't change the details.....

My daughter and I have come down with a serious illness and aren't going anyway (and then hide for ever)

Fuck off, I don't like your attitude, you, your family or your DDs freeloading family eith so stick it up your arsehole I'm going alone with DD

Any of those??

Grin

Having said that.....DD and I love Spain, we're free!!! Grin

alicet · 26/08/2010 21:53

I have to say that after this I would be going on holiday with these people over my dead body. Its hardly going to be an enjoyable experience now is it?

I would be sucking up the £275 you have just paid for her dd and telling them in no uncertain terms that they are not welcome on your holiday as you don't want to spend your holiday with people you no longer consider your friends.

Lets be clear - she has

  1. Invited 2 extra people you don't know
  2. Complained when she has to actually pay some money (after getting most of the holiday for free)
  3. Conned you into paying £275 for her dd to come with you
  4. THEN told you that she is leaving 3 days early.

No thanks - can do without that thanks. TTFO.

belledechocolatefluffybunny · 26/08/2010 21:53

Do you have any family who can go with you wood?

alicet · 26/08/2010 21:55

ANd by the way I wasn't wanting to be insulting to you by calling you a mug. I think you are almost certainly a lovely person who has tried your best to give people a free holiday that will also benefit you and your dd. Then it has blown up in your face.

They are tossers. Sack them off

alicet · 26/08/2010 21:57

Oh and you could also throw into tghe mix

'I am not letting your children down, YOU are by refusing to pay for YOUR holiday. You are further letting them down with your atrocious attitude which means you are definately not coming on my precious holiday that I have paid for. Sling your hook!'

woodstonobserver · 26/08/2010 21:57

BDCFB, Got a sister but she is 8 months pregnant so not really an option!

Thanks for all the advice, alicet et al... it is giving me strength xx

OP posts:
Tippychoocks · 26/08/2010 21:58

It sounds like it's worth writing off the £275 just to be rid of them.
Even when offered places as stand-ins like this, I would have thought it normal to offer to pay for changes to tickets and contribute in other ways. Not demand and whine and abuse you. Tell them to feck off far far away.

saintlydamemrsturnip · 26/08/2010 21:59

ex friend I presume?

of course YANBU.

wukter · 26/08/2010 21:59

That friendship is totally beyond redemption.
Feck company - you don't need to pay for such bad company.
Tell them the offer is withdrawn and you and DD have a lovely time together.

bumpsnowjustplump · 26/08/2010 21:59

But you didn't invite the boyfriend she did.. you kindly offered to pay for her and her daughter. If the boyfriend wants to come he has to pay and if his mum wants to come she can pay fgs...

It sounds to me like they want a free holiday and then will dump you and dd when they are out there anyway. There will be 4 of them and they are all family.. you will not have their company and I think they will push you and dd out...

Go on your own with dd or ask family to come..

JeMeSouviens · 26/08/2010 21:59

I feel very sad for you, your so called friends taking advantage. If I lived in the UK, I'd jump at the chance, pay my own way, and contribute to the villa costs!

I hope you and your daughter can just go on your own and enjoy your vacation.

belledechocolatefluffybunny · 26/08/2010 22:00

Seriously, they are taking the micky. You really can't allow them to go as they will just milk you and you'll end up having a crap time. They should have offered to pay, it's the right thing to do. You have a lovely heart, don't let them take advantage of you.

Tippychoocks · 26/08/2010 22:01

They also sound capable of madly taking the piss and/or ganging up when you're out there. Leave well alone sez I.

wukter · 26/08/2010 22:05

You had a lucky escape, how awful would it be to be stuck with them and their shocking attitudes for a whole week with no escape.
At least now you won't waste your precious holiday time on users. It's not just money, time is precious too.

woodstonobserver · 26/08/2010 22:06

The latest is that the said father is overseas and will pay but can't possibly right now as he is working overseas and won't be back until next week so could I "lend" them the money until then?!

Spurred on by your advice, my reply was simple! The dad has to call tomorrow to pay for the flight changes otherwise they don't happen!

Thanks again for your help. Amy xx

OP posts:
AlistairSim · 26/08/2010 22:08

You will have a lovely time, just you and your DD.

I went to Majorca with my mum when I was 14. We had a fantastic time, just the two of us.

Morloth · 26/08/2010 22:09

I think you are totally insane to even think about going on holiday with these people. Regardless of who is paying.

Tippychoocks · 26/08/2010 22:10

Forget the money. Tell them the offer's off!

TheCrackFox · 26/08/2010 22:11

I can guarantee you that if you did go on holiday with them they would expect you to pay for all drink, food and entertainment.

compo · 26/08/2010 22:12

So you still plan to go on holiday with these people despite a unanimous thread saying don't?

belledechocolatefluffybunny · 26/08/2010 22:13

Well done wood!! I really do hope they don't pay though, I think that they will expect you to pay for everything.

woodstonobserver · 26/08/2010 22:16

I wonder how many of them will turn up at Luton Airport on Saturday morning?

OP posts: