AIBU to insist on clarks shoes for 13 yr old dd

[ThatVikRinA22]

she says i am

i say its not negotiable. clarks do some nice trendy ballet shoe type efforts now in any case. last year hers lasted ages, were so comfy i would have nicked them for myself. they were lovely and trendy, little ballet slippers with a stone on the front with a dainty little strap across....nothing not to like and almost the same as anything you could pick up in New Look

when i was 13 i was wearing shoes 2 sizes too small. i never got my feet measured and i never got new shoes. im pretty insistent on having decent well fitting shoes for DD, who is sulking cos clarks shoes just are not kool...she is a size bigger than i am now but a very narrow fit.

aibu?

Ive just looked at the shoes in contention and sorry have to say YABU, the clarks ones look awful, might be an idea to let your daughter exercise her own taste here and save the argument for something like tarty clothing or makeup... Im not saying you have to let her get the NL ones - although at £15 you can afford to let them wear out quicker. I dont think the NL ones are going to do much in the way of damage to her feet. Can you not find better quality that suit you both?

Let her do the legwork (ha) get her measured at Clarks, tell her to get online and find something else for her £34 budget and then go and shop for them together once you know what you agree on.

SGM

Iremember the routine well, exit house, walk to corner hide behind tree, replace minging abominations (start-rite extra narrow specials) with pointy kitten heel suede with bow on (it was the 80s remember) also apply eye liner mascara and lip gloss. Proceed to bus stop.

The vile creations my mum forced me to wear because of my ridiculously narrow feet were one of an arsenal of things the gave other children ammunition to tease me about including being "posh" having moved from London to grim (aka Stoke)-on-Trent, being a vicars daughter, having wild unruly tangled curly hair (which I wasn't allowed to grow long hence being known as birds nest etc.) having a surname beginning with "w" hence the alliteration with "witch", being "too skinny" (although I doubt such an insult may exist these days and even then was probably borne out of jealousy from the idiots who dealt it) etc.etc.

I will do what I can to ensure dd won't suffer the same fate which includes nice shoes!

wow! loads of replies to wade through! ill don my reading specs and report back....

(we are still "debating" this issue my DD and i!)

the problems will really come is she is a half size, that plus the narrow feet thing could be the clincher....

Coming to this very late but how are ballet flats decent shoes? How can they be supportive?

I also have a dd same age so i know what your going through. Have you tried Barretts. We have just agreed on these brogues from Next. £17 So quite reasonable. may last until Xmas!! (www.next.co.uk/oldergirls/shoes)DD2 Y6 still happy to wear Clarks cost £32 will last abit longer than dd1. I will compromise with both dds but wont buy cheap tat that I know wont last one term. Hope this helps:D !!

so rocket dogs are best for narrow feet?

ive said i will take dd to clarks for a measure - if she is a half size then its bootlegs and its tough tits! (ive not seen 1/2 sizes anywhere else)

if she is a full size and i can find her some that she likes and that fit properly, without slobbing off or being too wide elsewhere then i ll happily compromise. but i have to say the ones she got last year are Bootleg from clarks and they lasted the entire year. still fit for use now from last september, and never a blister in sight, so comfy im going to pinch them now she has outgrown them! thats why im so wanting her to have the same or similar again - i give her free reign in choosing them and she can wear anything (within reason) for home - she has loads of boots, shoes and trainers and not from clarks i hasten to add - so i will compromise - but only if we can find something equally as good as last years model....

I had to wear clarks 'till I was 13 and then was allowed Ravels! Lol!

However, at 32, I Have great feet, no protruding bits or bunions. No deformed feet! So am sitting (or standing) pretty, thanks!

Yabu

She is 13 Puck your battles, her feet will not be damaged, in fact aren't we one of the only countries to be soooooooooo obsessed with fittng?

Let her pick them, how is it gonna hurt her or you?

My neices (13 &15) have those black canvas pumps for school. £2 a pair I'm primark so my sis buys 3 pairs each and that's them sorted

YABU but if she isn't teased for her shoes, it will probably be something else! Clarks are not 'better' than any other fit. Just compromise but ensure they fit. Also ballet slippers are as bad as stillettos for feet (apparently). The best ones are with a slight heel, so if healthy feet are the aim, maybe you should check this out.

ok.

this is the plan. we are going to go to meadowhall shopping centre on saturday - IF we can find some rocketdogs or similar that actually fit then she can have them.

if not. its the clarks shop for some bootlegs. thats the deal!

I feel your pain! I have 13 and 11 year old DD's and shopping for school shoes is hateful.

We ended up in Barratts - lots of different brands and half sizes on lots of styles. Not sure how long they are going to last or what the quality is like - we'll see . . .

Good luck.

mission accomplished.

i love my dd. she is so sensible!

she tried on loads.(really loads....got slightly fed up of mooching round shoe shops!) she liked some rocketdogs but worried she would grow out of them too fast. she agreed to get her feet measured at Clarks, which we did, despite it being full of babies she never moaned, got measured, she hated the clarks shoes she tried and they hurt her, plus the assistant measured her a 51/2 then proceeded to bring her shoes of 31/2...??? so we went to a barretts armed with info, and she got some really lovely rocketdog shoes that fit perfectly and she loves them. and so do i. so we are both happy.
and she cant nick my shoes anymore cos she is a full size bigger than me now! ha!
result. thanks everyone. i was being unreasonable and she wasnt.

Good on you and your dd, vicar. I think you did the right thing. When I was 13 and everyone was wearing court shoes with little metal heel tips, my best friend's mum made her wear Clarks school shoes. You wouldn't believe the size of the rebellion at 16 (drugs, drink, pregnancy, etc, etc). I don't blame the Clarks shoes, but they didn't help.

good to know

Excellent - glad you are sorted and you are both happy . My 13 yr old dd has just picked some rocketdogs for school as well, never had them before but she wouldn't touch Clarks for anything either - well not the children's ones, she has worn the adult black ballet pumps before tho so that may have been an option if you hadn't got sorted?

we looked.

in fact we spent 7 hours looking! but the rocketdogs have the edge....

they are really nice actually.

YANBU

i wore clarks until i was 16, 17 i had black zip up boots, the ones that were cool before uggs, had buckles up the side iyswim, they werent comfy so i went back and left school, im now 21.

and ive never worn comfier shoes, ive never ever had a bad word said about them and ALL my close friends had them or a few had kickers.

i cant see anything wrong with the clarks ones linked, id wear them, in fact theyre almost identical to a pair i have from next

My DD has narrow feet too. Ballet pumps from New Look etc just do not fit. I bought her a pair of Clarks shoes last week - these come in half sizes plus two width fittings.

www.clarks.co.uk/features/mizzy

DD has these ones www.clarks.co.uk/find/product-is-20342409

They might not be the most trendy shoe on the block but they were the only pair that fit DD. We spent 4 hours shoe shopping

Sorry, although I do like those Clarks you mention, I am old!

I think you should let her choose out her shoes, if it is important to her.

I wanted a leather jacket when I was 2-13ish, they gave me a leaf green vinyl one... with buttons!

There was not a sigle pair of shoes in Canterbury yesterday that fit my dd. Never mind whether she liked them or not - we didn't get that far. There just weren't any that fit!

Oops, that is what happens when I can't wait to read to the end!
Glad it is all sorted!