to buy a Chiminea in which to burn my

[Sweeedes]

unwanted personal paperwork?

I can't bring myself to buy a shredder, they are truly the chair-lifts of the stationery equipment world.

Is it a terrible idea?

Yeh, bad idea, you'd be left with lots of ash. Also bad for the environment. Anyway, shredding is FUN. Kids love shredding.