to NOT want a health visitor to come to my house?

[Heathcliffscathy]

didn't have this last time as had indep midwives. just picked up red book when saw health visitor at gp surgery at 8 week check.

I've been visited by lovely community midwives at home several times. baby doing fab, has put on a pound this week (!!). I'm fine if tired.

They're going to bash me over the head with a sledgehammer re immunisations (which I certainly wouldn't countenance at 8 weeks, and in fact have no intention of having at all as with ds1) and probably suggest a formula top up. even the midwife agreed that health visitors are woefully misinformed a lot of the time and have very strange ideas wrt for eg early weaning.

I don't want her to come. can I say no and just go for 8 week check at gps?

I told my HVs (lovely bf supportive ones at the BF group) that I had a bad experience of HVs and did not intend to consult one ever again, thanks very much, however lovely they all were. I was 'opting out' of the HV system. They understood and have never bothered me since, though I see them occasionally at bf group.

Be clear and polite and you too will be freeeeeeeeee.......

AFAIK yes you can just say no.

I am 35 weeks, I will just nod and smile when they come then do as I please.

What makes you think they'll suggest formula top up? Mine never has despite DD2 never putting on anywhere near a pound in a week!

Of course you don't have to see them if you don't want to, but you might be surprised - you might get a sensible one

Just say no. Be firm. tell her you've booked/will book gp 8 wk check.
be gone with you

I said no.
I also waited until dc3 was 3 before starting any imm's, they were okay about it really.

I am sure you can say no - your house and all that.

However if I were you I would suck it up, listen to what they want to say, and either smile and nod or clearly tell them that you disagree and will be doing x but thanks for their time.

If you are so secure in the fact you are doing the best by your children where is the harm in spending half an hour talking to someone about it before seeing them on their way? If not you will just have to put up with the GP / practice nurses questioning your decision about immunisations all the time anyway so just face it and deal with it now if I were you

Yes, you can just say you don't want the visits and do the babies 8 week check at the GP's.

Pleased to hear you're both doing well :) How is DS1 taking to it?

You don't have to see them. They might not bother you much anyway. Mine only came twice, not seen them since dd was 4 weeks old.

sophable

I said no to any HV visits.
I also explained that I had no intention of giving DD any vaccinations. I spoke to my GP and explained it and they left me alone.

DD is nearly 8. Has never seen a HV, has never had any checks exceptthe 18 months one which my GP did.

The thing is that you simply have to demonstrate that you have made clear informed decisions. Then they leave you be.

You do have to endure that when you visit the GP with your child the screen will flash "WARNING - no vaccinations!"
I think it may also say nutter but they have never left it switched on facing me for me to be able to tell

Don't be defensice or worried. Just tell them. It will be fine

i'm not defensive or worried, was prepared to see her even tho massive pita as already seen a midwife today. she phoned half an hour late to say she couldn't find my address and i said that I had to go pick up ds (which I do). she started flapping quite rudely about needing to see the baby at 14 days. I said that I'd just seen the midwife from the same bloody health centre as her (didn't say bloody of course) and been discharged.

I'm tired, can't sleep if expecting frigging health professionals that can't be arsed to be on time and also know that my baby has been checked both by my GP who did the newborn check and several times by excellent community midwives.

I want to just go for 8 week check and get red book, but she said oh no way you can't get the red book from your gp (??? i did last time).

I didn't like her manner tbh which was grumpy and brusque. made me feel WTF should I make room in my day for you only for you give me a hard time for you being late!!!

so now i'm wondering if I can skip the whole thing!

Be careful. My HV found out I'd wanted to opt out (in the end the MW warned me not to) and tried to get me referred to Social Services...

that's outrageous.

They might not. I was worried about the jabs monologue and getting a formula enthusiast. My HV was a BF counsellor and didn't make a fuss about the jabs.

I worked myself into a right tizzy over nothgin.

I've never had a HV suggest a formula top up (3 children, all breastfed).

mine told me not to consider weaning until my dd3 was at least 17 weeks

baby is 2 wo and exclusively bf

terribly helpful

all fine. called gp surgery they said of COURSE i could just get them to post red book and then come at 8 weeks (she had said on phone that I couldn't do this!) and so rang her boss who also said yes of course that's fine, is posting red book and details of clinics so if i have any concerns I can do to them.

if she hadn't been so grumpy i'd have seen her today!

I hope you mentioned to her boss that she was late, rude, incorrect and grumpy?

They may not bash you over the head. I told my HV that ds2 wasn't having vax and when she visited for ds3 she said 'i know you won't be giving them'. She was also heard to say a few times 'hmm I'd do the same in your situation'.

I only really saw her for hearing checks etc with ds2 and ds3.

Congratulations btw sophable - I missed that you'd given birth!

I only saw mine for hearing check for DS at 10 days I think and then never since. Always swerved her at baby clinic when I went to get DS weighed as well.

chipping in the nicest possible way...I did!

her boss was at great pains to suggest that I must get ds weighed at baby clinic to make sure he was putting on weight well. when I said that I didn't think there were any problems on that count (he's put on a lb this week, oh, did i mention that already :o ) she said that she would advise getting him weighed anyway to make sure he wasn't putting on too much weight.

I didn't go into a diatribe about the fucking charts being american and completely inappropriate for european children anyway nevermind the fact that growth charts are a bag of ole shite. but I did feel like doing so. sort of epitomised why I don't really approve of HVs!

thanks saintly, good to see you!

HVs will be glad to have someone off their books, to spend time with Mums who want/need them there. It amazes me that so many folk on here think HVs have nothing better to do with their time than visit people who don't need to see them and don't want to see them.

Our HVs have stopped visiting people where there are no issues/problems. They've stopped weighing babies where there are no developmental problems.

When I have seen a HV they have been very helpful and supportive.

Sophable - good :)

So what exactly do they propose if he's 'put on too much weight' at 8 weeks - weight watchers? You can't win, honest you can't and it's why it's soooo much better to not have them visit.

lal123 - you have been very fortunate.

I stopped my HV appointment, too. I realised that the HV was just really winding me up and I knew where to get help when it was needed. I certainly don't need a lecture about BFing when I am BFing, for a start.