to be annoyed that DH stalks me on MN talk

[griffaloschild]

The other week I walked in to our living room and DH started quoting to me something I had posted on here.

I was a little taken aback and asked him what he was talking about. He went on to explain that he had been looking for threads that he could see I'd looked at (either highlighted or through history) and looking to see if and what I had posted.

I felt a little... well.. violated might be a bit strong...but you know what I mean. I said it felt like he had been looking at my diary/emails/texts but he said I was being very silly and that as it is a public forum it was fair game. My argument was that we don't use our real names, by and large, to preserve some anonymity.

AIBU?

p.s. hello DH hope you enjoyed this one!

If he does other stuff like this it could be a sign of something you need to deal with. It feels a bit controlling to me but I am hypersensitive to that kind of thing.

In fact he should have apologised not told you you were silly . It is a public forum but everyone's anonymous unless they choose not to be. That's the point of it, so you can vent. Or, reinvent yourself as someone more exciting / glamorous /witty .

Dreamy - My DH has very considerately done the same thing. WoW Widow

I think your DH cares about you. He is activelly interested in you which is admirable. Maybe he also feels that you are not sharing your most intimate thoughts with him or he feels neglected.
You must consider that, in contrast with yours, many husbands are passioate about telly, PC games or or other manly things (like porn) and they don't care about what their wifes are getting up to online?

MrGriffalloschild - Don't worry if we do anything interesting it will be on the news. Thus stalking is unnecessary, creepy and a bit last month. Bugger off!

I think it is sinister, not "admirable"

My DH always rolls his eyes and mutters under his breath "saddosnet then"
I much rather that than him stalking me.

Tell DH to goggle you if he wants to find out what you have typed. Then change your name.
That'll learn him.

Tell him to google you and that your MN name is AnyFucker

that will learn him

Thats not fair. His eyes will bleed

or dittany

Ha ha love the Dittany suggestion only been on mn few months and I know why that's funny?
I think It's a bloody cheek. does he read your texts too. I also tell dh to fuck off when he lurks over my shoulder. largely as im normally slating him or his folks. Tbh don't even like blokes on here its MUMs net. Can't they start a dadsnet the threads would be limited tho wouldn't they?

I would be pissed off, DP always looks over my shoulder when im on the PC it drives me mad, he also strops when i tell his to eff orf.

I once thought he had looked at my Mumsnet posts by some things he casually said, i was fucking fuming and i changed my name pronto and didnt leave myself signed in.

Mrgriffaloschild youhoo over here.... now be a dear and let your wife have some fucking privacy....

Or someone who is on the Breast feeding threads all the time. That will really give him something to think about

tough.you post on a open forum anyone can read it inc your dh.dont post anything online if you dont want him read.it isnt akin to a diary at all.mn is open to anyone,reproducible,and lasts in cyberspace too

he is absolutely right.you psot on an open forum its accessible and fair game

Doesn't everyone delete their history every time they use the computer?

I do - I would be Mortified if anyone in my RL read my posts on here.....

Dreamy, my DF plays eve online.

but i suppose as this is a public site anything put on here is for the public to read...even if i think he shouldn't be checking your history

of course he is right that it is an open forum

but to deliberately look up your posts, to see what you are saying ?

disturbing

OP, tell him you have namechanged to scottishmummy

aye,if hes handsome send him round

Set up another profile and post some really wierd and warped stuff and then accidently leave it signed in so he thinks you have just changed your name!

stop being a tippy toe princess.at least someone reads your posts

It's an invasion of your privacy - on about the same level as reading a diary, if not worse.... I would be well pissed off if it was me!

rubbish!on a public forum you have no privacy.you post into public domain anyone can read,store or reproduce your posts.and claiming its like a precious diary is not on,unless you randomly post your diary online too

why is it ok for anonymous strangers on mn to read your posts,but not the guy you're intimate with,share a home with?

you have this arse over tit if you want to chat to strangers,let them read,comment but not your dh

bonkers

I was going to suggest telling him your posting name was AnyFucker but see I have been beaten to it.

It is not the same as reading a diary, as a diary is not posted on the WWW for any hairy handed trucker to read.

At the same time, it is a betrayal of trust. My DH knows that I post on MN and I sometimes tell him of the things that I have read, but he would not go searching for my posts. In the same way that I would not read his emails.

MrGriffallo
Bugger off.

And while you are at it, bring your charming wife a glass of wine and a some chocolate.

But scottishmummy we are all anonymous here, or can remain so if we choose to. When the OP's DH is reading her posts he knows it's her, which is a differently thing entirely.

griffaloschild's husband - why are you checking up on her? Are you worried she's telling us all what a terrible husband you are?