to show DS my "middle bottom"

[greedyguts]

DS (5) has been asking how babies come out of mummies. I wanted to tell him the truth (kind of) so I explained that mummies have 3 bottom bits - a front bottom for doing wees, a back bottom for doing poos and a middle bottom for babies to come out of.

He is desperate now to see the middle bottom and keeps asking me to show him. Should I? Would it scar him for life? How the hell can I stop him going on about it?

Here's mine...

Have another

You need a book with a picture (drawn rather than actual)

This is why god invented farm animals.... Find a video of a calf or lamb being born and show him that. There's an episode of Tweenies that has one.... I remember because that's how we started discussing sex ed at the tender age of 3!! No gynaecology required.

I would buy him a book and show him pictures, not porn, more like a "about the body" book for kids!

OMG. I so hope you're on the wind-up OP, or else you've seriously lost perspective. Of course you mustn't show him! Distract him if he goes on about it and make it 100% clear that he doesn't need to see it.

If you are seeking shock, you'll get it for a while until people get bored and head off for some tea and s.

How to stop him going on about it? Tell him no and that you don't expect him to argue. We cannot always have what we want. End of.

Should you show him? Why on earth would you want to! Far rather say that it's not polite to go around showing other people our 'bottoms'. Or perhaps in some families children are reared to believe that a person should go around showing their bits?

Would it scar him for life? Erm... probably not but as he gets older he may think that you are a little odd if you do show him.

Agree with everyone else, tv or a book, do not show him yours!

No - that's a bonkers idea.

Also if every section of your nether regions is referred to as some kind of bottom, he will end up very confused. Get him a book with some sensible words in it.

I do hope this is a wind up. Otherwise, you're mad! 5 year olds understand that no means no, end of. Just keep saying it.

Get a book or a DVD.

just imagining the scenario at school

DS teacher "What did you do yesterday"

DS "mummy showed me her middle bottom"

think that pretty much sums up where this could end up....

Whatever you do, stop referring to female genitals as bottoms. Would you call a penis a front bottom? It is really degrading to women to have their reproductive organs associated with crap because of misplaced gentility.

Hmmm - what should I call it then? Surely it would be worse if he kept asking to see my vagina?

I'm not actually going to show him my bits. Just wanted a bit of fun and some WWYD ideas.

Work is a tad slow this morning

A picture is definitely a good idea. I'm thinking something line drawn & anatomically correct. I am a responsible adult - really.

He's probably expecting you to have this permanent gaping hole the size of a football as is intruiged. Tell him that the hole closes up very small when there's no baby to come out, and there's nothing to see. Which is true IMO.

Seriously.... YouTube 'birth of a lamb'. Here's an example complete with a young lad looking on and helping the farmer. Say the lamb was in the uterus or womb and comes out of the birth canal via the vagina. He will be fascinated by the whole process and the language of it, will probably satisfy his curiosity and it's much more explanatory than a line drawing.

GG - I think at 5 he is old enough to be told to stop asking to see your genitals. He should know for his own wellbeing that some parts of our bodies are private, and not constantly talked about in public.

Naturally he is curious and that's a good thing, but teach him the correct names, and explain about privacy. If you look at a book together, he can see pictures and ask all the questions he wants then.

I also think he is ready for the concept of privacy. Middle Bottoms are Private. It is NOT polite to talk about them or ask to see them. It is important to respect this privacy. etc etc. Please. Before he goes out in public again.

Show him a book.

And stop being so bloody attention seeking, you are either utterly thick or a pervert looking for kicks on here can't quite decide which.

no no no

obviously yes you would be beyond unreasonable to show your son your genitals.

I agree with picture book, some very good ones available, have a look on amazon.

Its us to you what to call it but personally, we prefer to use the proper words i.e. girls have a vagina and boys have a penis.

Also agree regarding the concept of privacy. My dd is 4 and very into her own personal / her daddy's privacy. That said, because we're girls, she does come into the bathroom and sometimes chat to me/brush her teeth etc.. while Im in the bath.

I am not attention seeking. Nor am I thick.

Of course I'm not going to show him - just thought it might give you all a bit of a laugh.

Seriously though - I thought this forum would give me some good ideas of how to tackle this (which it has - thanks to the helpful posters).

I have been explaining about the concept of privacy. And I do keep telling him no - he can't see because it is private. And I have explained that his own genitals are private too.

He doesn't ask all the time, but this has been going on for about a year now and he still asks. And I'm not the type of person that says "no,no,no,no - oh go on then". If I say no then I don't go back on it and he knows this. I guess he keeps asking because I haven't answered his questions satisfactorily.

I'll check out that youtube video - I think that will answer a lot of questions. And probably create a whole load more - like how did it get in there!

Oh and also, she was very interested too in "how would the baby get out" (when I was pregnant with ds this year), telling her the doctor was going to take him out didnt work so I simply told her that sometimes baby's come out from the mammy's vagina, sometimes the doctor has to make a little cut in the tummy. I was worried I was been to honest but this as children always are so accepting, she was as happy as larry with this answer. (I did tell her it didnt hurt though)

No no no
!!!!!

I found a lovely waterbirth clip on the Channel 4 website, from the One Born every minute series. The women was calm, the amount that could be seen was just right. I also let him watch a more "traditional" birth woman giving birth on a hospital bed but I turned the sound off. Around the time DS2 was born he watched lots of birth clips on the internet.

If he asks to see, say there is nothing to see as its only big when baby coming out otherwise just small hole for wees. Of course DS1 then said he wanted to watch me give birth, although although I thought about decided not to go for home birth.

DS has just turned 4, and interested as he has a new baby brother, and although I have no qualms about having a bath with him I wouldn't show him (or his 6 year old sister either) etc etc. If the clip isn't enough, perhaps a book would be more appropriate.

I hate the term "front bottom" or "middle bottom". Its not a bottom. Find a proper name for it. In our house girls have nunnies (although have told both DS and DD actually called vagina), where the wee comes from and the nunny can stretch a lot when the baby comes out.

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It's a mistake to assume anyone on a message board has a sense of humour... remember another time to lard your post with plenty of and etc., to hammer it home that you're not being entirely serious.

FWIW I found that 'how did it get in there?' was a much later question to 'how does it get out?'. And my (probably slightly too candidly biological) explanation resulted in an expression of mild horror. Still... the subject has not come up again since so my theory is that the better the explanation, the quicker they are satisfied. They know when you're holding back!!

Well, the DC of a friend of mine asked to watch her parents creating a baby. It could be worse...