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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to find it astonishing that ladies who are having an intimate relationship with someone

31 replies

ByThePowerOfGreyskull · 28/07/2010 20:29

wouldnt be prepared to let him see what she looks like with no makeup on.

I feel like an old hag, but if you feel that your relationship is at the stage where you are getting your kit off and having sex then surely you should feel able to let him see what you look like without any make up on?

I totally understand that make up can build confidence and it can make you look fab. But there is surely a point when you are close to someone where you are able to wear a little less /none at all?

So this has been sparked by some random survey about how many men have never seen their partners without make up.

OP posts:

NanBullen · 28/07/2010 20:37

I think i got up once or twice very very early on in me and dhs relationship to put a bit of slap on (not the full works, concealer because i have horrendous dark circles) but soon came to my senses.

he's used to seeing me like death warmed up now

Must admit though, if i ever stay over at a friends house or with the in laws i make sure i have some make up on before seeing them, i'm quite paranoid about my face. I'm very envious of women who can just get up and not look like they are seriously ill

That's my problem though, i know one else would care.

slushy · 28/07/2010 20:37

YANBU I had a friend who had been with her partner two years and went to bed with make-up on and got out of bed once he was sleeping to remove it, She also set the alarm for 5 in order to get up shower and do her make-up and straighten her hair in time for him to get up at 6.30.

I felt sorry for her personally she must have had really low confidence .

Nemofish · 28/07/2010 20:38

I have no problem with a bloke seeing me with no make up on, have only ever worn the minimum anyway, if I do bother.

However, a bloke knowing that I use the toilet, or fart, or perform any bodily function?

Ruins my feminine mystique. Was weeks before I stopped making excuses to dp as to why I just had to pop upstairs for a bit... and months before I could go number 2 with him in the house!

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 28/07/2010 20:38

YANBU, but then I don't generally wear make-up unless I'm going out so I am probably biased.

slushy · 28/07/2010 20:39

"Must admit though, if i ever stay over at a friends house or with the in laws i make sure i have some make up on before seeing them, i'm quite paranoid about my face. I'm very envious of women who can just get up and not look like they are seriously ill envy"

They don't get up and not look seriously ill they (me included) just don't give a shit .

NanBullen · 28/07/2010 20:39

Oh, i'll fart in front of anyone.....

Original poster

ByThePowerOfGreyskull · 28/07/2010 20:39

nan - I get that - I don't do the same but I do understand, it is more the whole once he has seen every other inch of you why not your face..

OP posts:

DuelingFanjo · 28/07/2010 20:40

I feel the same about hair removal. Some women are just bizzare!

Original poster

ByThePowerOfGreyskull · 28/07/2010 20:40

x posts I was not talking about farting

OP posts:

NanBullen · 28/07/2010 20:41

MorrisZapp · 28/07/2010 20:43

I'm the opposite. On the odd occasions I wear makeup, I try to avoid DP seeing - he hates it and moans his head off.

Apparently he prefers the 'natural look'. Like Kylie Minogue - pah.

Sometimes he reminds me of a victorian dad - 'wipe that muck off your face' etc. Or he would if he thought he would get away with it.

Original poster

ByThePowerOfGreyskull · 28/07/2010 20:44

I have to say that I did stop wearing as much makeup when I forgot to put it on before going to work one day and all day people asked me if I was feeling ok. I felt like shouting - I am fine - this is just how I look!

OP posts:

tethersend · 28/07/2010 20:44

Pffft. DP has seen parts of me I've never seen (against advice, strayed from the head end during caesarean).

Eyeliner seems like pissing in the wind now, tbh.

TrillianAstra · 28/07/2010 20:45

Like Kylie? What? She's wearing loads of makeup.

I don't know anyone who does this.

overmydeadbody · 28/07/2010 20:45

I don't wear makeup in front of DP, but I agree about the farting and never use the loo with the door open or him in there.

Also, I am quirw particular about always having my underarms and legs shaved, I could not imagine him seeing me hairy (even though I don't think he'd notice or care, I do)

Sammyuni · 28/07/2010 20:46

Depends how much makeup the woman had on when he met her. Some women look so much like a different person that you can have difficulty recognising them.

thesunshinesbrightly · 28/07/2010 20:51

I would die if my OH seen me without make-up he is gorgeous and he might realize what a pig he is going out with if he seen me without my slap on

ChippingIn · 28/07/2010 20:52

tethersend 'Eyeliner seems like pissing in the wind now tbh'

I'm going to have to make yet another cup of tea now, I keep spluttering it all over the keyboard.

I very, very rarely wear make up... couldn't be done with a relationship so shallow I felt the need to... shrug.

MorrisZapp · 28/07/2010 20:52

Of course Kylie is clarted in the stuff but DP doesn't see that. He thinks that buff women on the telly are 'natural' but that I am a big fat fake if I use any fake tan, makeup, high heelage etc.

We used to fight about it a lot but I lost patience and went mental at him once and for all. Like, really mental. He's been reasonable about it ever since though I suspect that deep down he still thinks it.

thesunshinesbrightly · 28/07/2010 20:57

Kylie - natural?? that made me laugh out loud.
Has your DH seen her without make-up??

HouseofCrazy · 28/07/2010 20:57

I hardly ever wear makeup. I pee and poo in front of DH. Hair removal in winter only.

He doesnt wear makeup either. He pees and poos in front of me. And farts. He does shave during the week tho.

We obviously have NO boundaries!!

FakePlasticTrees · 28/07/2010 20:58

Kylie has (I've been told) had rather a lot of work done...

I regularly don't wear makeup in front of DH - but then this is a man who's held back my hair while I've thrown up more times than I care to mention.

And surely the point of make up is to make you look more attractive to your DP. Which should lead to sex. Which (if enough effort is put in) should lead to your makeup being sweated off... (or do I just need a better base?)

deemented · 28/07/2010 21:06

The manshape has never seen me with make up on.

We share a bathroom, but although i've wee'd in front of him, i couldn't poo in front of him - there are some things that have to remain private He'd happily shite in front of me though - but i'd much rather he didn't given the fact that it often smells like summats crawled up his arse and died...

laweaselmys · 28/07/2010 21:17

Erm, well DP was meant to be no commitment fun, so he saw me without make up the day after I met him but with any guy I have dated I only wore makeup for the first few weeks. I am just too lazy!! And no bloke has ever mentioned it, or suddenly dumped me...

How can you go to the loo physically in front of someone you shag though?! That is TOO relaxed! Besides why? We only have one loo, and I have never been even remotely that desperate.

lazarusb · 28/07/2010 22:04

I was with dh about 6 months before he saw me sober/ without a hangover so make-up really isn't an issue He's also seen me push 2 babies out and all that entails... and I see him without make-up all the time too..

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