Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

to think leaving 9 year old home alone sick is not right

77 replies

lisad123isgoingcrazy · 22/07/2010 15:35

Got a call while out with friend for lunch from DH. Next doors Little girl was at the door in the rain, having been locked out! Told DH to let her in, but he was due back at work 15mins later. I had to leave lunch with friends, pick her up and then take her to DD1 school show with me.
Little girls mum is at hospital visit with grown up son, which i knew. But i am shocked she left her dd2 alone at 9 years old. AIBU?

Oh and shes still not back 3 hours later, hate to think what would have happened if DH hadnt come home on his lunch break to sort out the dog?

OP posts:

GypsyMoth · 22/07/2010 15:36

how come she was locked out?

Original poster

lisad123isgoingcrazy · 22/07/2010 15:38

she went out front to put tins in recycling box, and door shut on her

OP posts:

domesticdiva · 22/07/2010 15:38

Thats awful, YADNBU! I wouldn't leave a 9 year old whether they were sick or not, especially as the child has proven she can exit the house easy enough. Is she back yet? What did she tell the little girl? Poor thing

2blessed2bstressed · 22/07/2010 15:38

Was she supposed to be at school? Did she get sent home because she wsn't well? And if that's the case, did the school not phone your neighbour to arrange for little girl to be picked up, or at least for them to be sure the mum was at home?

2blessed2bstressed · 22/07/2010 15:39

x post, sorry, that's really not acceptable then. grr

Original poster

lisad123isgoingcrazy · 22/07/2010 15:39

nope shes still here sat on my sofa. Her sister is due home soon too and she doesnt have a key either (according to her sister) so looks like i will have both

OP posts:

GypsyMoth · 22/07/2010 15:41

how sick is she? whats wrong with her?

Original poster

lisad123isgoingcrazy · 22/07/2010 15:41

nope mum went off this morning, knowing DD2 was home sick (doesnt seem that unwell to me tbh) but think she knew she wouldnt be back for school pick up so kept her off

OP posts:

MoonUnitAlpha · 22/07/2010 15:42

All day is too long to leave a 9 year old, especially with no one checking in on her!

If the mum had warned a neighbour she was on her own and had asked them to keep an eye out/check on her periodically then it might be reasonable, but it was only luck there was anyone in at yours.

Timbachick · 22/07/2010 15:44

Appalling. I though it was against the law to leave a child under 12 alone or am I wrong .

Original poster

lisad123isgoingcrazy · 22/07/2010 15:44

well she knew i was out today as she asked last night if i was around to let girls in after school (I said i would be here after school but was busy during day) other neighbour works.

OP posts:

MoonUnitAlpha · 22/07/2010 15:45

No, it's not against the law Timbachick - there's no particular age limit, but obviously the parent could be done for negligence or endangering a child depending on the circumstances.

bibbitybobbityhat · 22/07/2010 16:07

Agree that all day is too long. I would leave my 9 year old alone for maybe up to an hour, but not for a full school day.

Timbachick · 22/07/2010 16:22

Moon, just checked myself prior to coming back to this thread and you are right. There is actually no law which kind of surprises me. DirectGov says that "children under the age of 12 are rarely mature enough to be left alone" and the NSPCC says that it is an "offence to leave a child alone when doing so leaves them at risk". Think this is way too long for a 9 year old to be left, especially as they were supposed to be ill . Some peoples behaviour is just downright strange.

Original poster

lisad123isgoingcrazy · 22/07/2010 16:23

Now have both girls here and still waiting mums return
I need to get kids tea done soon, might be 2 extra at this rate!

OP posts:

MrsFC · 22/07/2010 16:37

And also - why was she doing chores? Putting tins in the recycling box indicates that she had been instructed to tidy up....

diddl · 22/07/2010 16:38

Is it possible the girl came home from school without permission?

Seems odd a 9yr old putting the recycling out?

And if neighbour had checked that you would be there it sounds as if she had intended to send her to school.

Hope it gets sorted out & that the hospital visit is going OK for the neighbour.

Original poster

lisad123isgoingcrazy · 22/07/2010 16:42

well no Im pretty sure she left her there this morning, as when i called mum she didnt seem surprised.
I also had to lend her DD1's leggings too as all she had on was a long jumper but no bottoms

OP posts:

Tiredmumno1 · 22/07/2010 16:52

That is terrible i hope you will be telling her that if this ever happens again then you will have no choice but call the police.

firstly she should never have been left alone and secondly neighbours are not babysitters.

she is out of order, is she back yet?

Original poster

lisad123isgoingcrazy · 22/07/2010 16:56

nope still not back
I need to get tea on the table for when DH gets home at 5.30pm as we are going out at 6.45pm
And no I wont be telling her that, shes having a hard enough time as it is, we all make bad choices sometimes.

OP posts:

Tiredmumno1 · 22/07/2010 17:00

but its not a bad choice though is it, anything could have happened, it was a stupid choice.

i have had hard times but would never leave any of my kids home alone its asking for trouble.

please dont condone this behaviour, at the very least you should have stern words.

and give her a call and find out where she is and how long she is going to be

Homebird8 · 22/07/2010 17:03

"the child has proven she can exit the house easy enough"

Thank goodness. What if there was a fire?

zeno · 22/07/2010 17:05

It depends on the maturity of the child and how sick she is. Doesn't sound like she's particularly ill, so probably yabu.

If a grown-up got locked out in the rain and had to wait for someone to come home with a key, they would probably call on a neighbour to see if they could hang out until then. Very sensible I think. Inconvenient for you, yes, but not out of order.

Also, I don't get why people think it's wierd for a nine year old to put out the recycling. Gawd knows they spend long enough in schools banging on about recycling. Our dd was doing it aged four of her own volition .

ivykaty44 · 22/07/2010 17:09

zeno - I wonder why though if she was ill that she was sorting recycling? But op says she doesn't really think she is ill.

Op where is the father - is he at hospital to?

Do you think there might be something wrong at the hospital? I hope not...

LimaCharlie · 22/07/2010 17:10

By lisad123isgoingcrazy Thu 22-Jul-10 16:56:16
"...And no I wont be telling her that, shes having a hard enough time as it is, we all make bad choices sometimes."
Lisa you're so lovely

Flip

1 2 3 4

Swipe left for the next trending thread