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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Half-Birthdays.... AIBU?

105 replies

JustaHalf · 17/07/2010 13:14

Got an invite last week for a birthday party.

DS was excited, and I was happy for him. Then saw the date, it's while we are away, so we couldn't go. DS cried.

Driving back I though, ah, poor child, how nice of him to invite DS, (DS is older) perhaps I'll just get a card and a little gift to say thanks for inviting us. DS will leave the school and start his new term in Big School in September.

So I looked at the invite... imagine my to see the party is... GET THIS..

For a child who will be 3 1/2 - yes THREE AND A HALF!!!

So am I correct in thinking that if we were able to attend, that the correct thing to do would be to take a gift? and a card?

Does anyone know where one can buy a Half Birthday card?... or is there a business opportunity there??....

Would we have to sing Happy Birthday?

How many candles does the little darling blow out? 3 and a stump?

Now I totally 'get' that winter birthdays are tougher for DC because you can't hire a bouncy castle and have a run about in the garden. (Unless Hypothermia is your bag)

DS birthday is the week before Christmas, we didn't have a Children's Party, just family. Have I deprived him? is he scarred for life?

Or should I book a hall sharpish????

FWIW, my opinion is that if you want to throw a summer party for your winter-born DC, all well and good, but not to dress it up as a birthday party, just a fun day for all invited.

Secretly tempted to RSVP saying Sorry that we can't make the party, let us know when he's actually 4....

So, AIBU?

btw, namechanged for this... have been here yonks, honest.... Got a few more days at the school, don't want to cause a ruck there before DS leaves if I'm outed....

OP posts:
vixma · 17/07/2010 20:27

Type in 3.5 lol

SweetApril · 17/07/2010 20:34

FakePlasticTrees, do you acknowledge the Christmas Day birthday at all or ignore it and celebrate six months later with presents, cards, party, etc? I only ask as I know someone whose baby is due Christmas Day and I suggested "moving" the subsequent birthday celebrations to a date a bit later in the year before the child is even aware of what birthdays are. My idea went down like a sack of sick but my whole life I've always thought anytime in the two weeks surrounding Christmas would be a difficult time to have a birthday, especially in terms of parties (everyone partied out) and presents (all in one go and then have to wait a whole year).

Sorry, hijacking the thread a bit. I think half birthdays just for the sake of it are excessive.

RunawayWife · 17/07/2010 20:39

I think you are being a tad unreasonable,
Each to their own as they say

dinkystinky · 17/07/2010 20:42

Half birthdays are abit crazy as a concept. I'd say if your child is a winter baby (and DS2 is) and you want a summer get together for your kids and their friends, just organise a group picnic or something in the park (no presents, no cards - everyone bring a dish) and they'll have a brilliant time...

Firawla · 17/07/2010 20:44

i think its quite silly, i would never do it
i saw someone who did a birthday party, huge personalised cake and everything for a 6 months old "half birthday" ffs!!!

Hulababy · 17/07/2010 20:47

DD has a friend who has her birthday on Christmas Day. Obviusly this is not an ideal time for a birthday party. So she always has a half birthday mid June.

We send a birthday card at Christmas, but we send a present (no card) at her party.

They do have cake, etc but don't sing happy birthday as far as I am aware - lthough you could easily adopt the tune and sing happy half birthday to you anyway.

I really can't see the problem. Maybe mum wouldn't have a party in the winter for whatever reason. Does it matter.?

If you don't like it, then don't send your child.

But to begrudge an invite to a party for your child just because it is not the host's real birthday? Some people might be just happy their chil recieved an ivite at all, that their child was though of as a wanted guest!

BubbaAndBump · 17/07/2010 20:49

I think you're all being a bit mean here. I understand the OP's DS's friend's issue - I like to celebrate my half birthday. Can you believe that at my most recent half-birthday, neither DH, parents, friends nor sister's did anything?! Not even a Happy Half Birthday song to me when I phoned to remind them (I'd even written it into my parents' calendar to remind them )

mrsruffallo · 17/07/2010 20:51

It's ridiculous

bibbitybobbityhat · 17/07/2010 20:55

I think half birthdays are absolutely fine if it is the child's only big celebration/party of the year. It isn't much fun, actually, trying to organise a party suitable for a lot of children in the depths of winter.

satc2bringiton · 17/07/2010 20:55

Crazy idea.

It's bad enough organising 1 party a year!

mellifluouscauliflower · 17/07/2010 20:56

You don't know the circumstances..maybe there was a birth, or illness or a death in the family that meant a planned party at the time couldn't happen.

And yes, as a beginning of Jan child who only had one party in her whole life (in October), I can tell you that your son will be using this in therapy for many many years to come.. (joke!)

PaulineCampbellJones · 17/07/2010 21:04

My DD is a couple of days before Christmas. She hasn't Even had her first birthday yet but have already had people pulling the and telling me noone will ever come to her birthday parties as it's too near Christmas. I wouldn't go as far as a half birthday but a summery party held in her honour may be considered. Maybe for the parents who do it is a way of spreading the cost of the double whammy Christmas and birthday?

Hulababy · 17/07/2010 21:09

satc2bringiton - DD's friends mum is only organising one party a year. It just happens to be mid June (half birthday rather than for her daugter's Christmas Day birthday. The half birthday is not an additional party.

paisleyleaf · 17/07/2010 21:12

DD's birthday is autumntime and I've always been a bit envious of summer birthdays for the outdoor parties and a reason to get summer toys for pressies.
But I wouldn't actually do a half birthday though - that's bonkers.

RunawayWife · 17/07/2010 22:10

Its my whole birthday next Friday

EvilTwins · 17/07/2010 22:16

I don't think it's odd. When I was a child, one of my friends always had a half-birthday party instead of a birthday party because her birthday is in December.

Unless the child in question is having both a birthday party and a half birthday party, I don't see the problem.

Recently, my DTDs were invited to a party for a boy at their nursery. I duly asked them how old he was going to be and they said 4. So we got Happy 4th Birthday cards. Turns out the party was actually to celebrate his 3rd birthday (doh) but that the birthday itself was a few months ago.

Surely it's no biggie.

bossyboop · 17/07/2010 22:20

this is ridiculous, would kids not end up a bit spoilt and at what age would they grown out of it. Throwing a summer party fine, just a party, but a birthday party suggests presents are required. If it were me i wouldnt go, if my child was desperate to go then i wouldnt bother with a card or present, its just greedy!

Oenopod · 17/07/2010 22:27

Fucking ridiculous.

BitOfFun · 17/07/2010 22:32

I can see the point if the child is terminally ill or something, but other than that, no. But I feel a bit sceptical of the OP tbh.

Hulababy · 17/07/2010 22:34

But why is it odd? Obviously a child with a Christmas birthday is not going to be able to have aparty at Christmas easily. So sould they just miss out on prties? Seems sensibl to me to half it half way through.

Marrow · 17/07/2010 22:36

My sister's birthday is on Christmas Day. My Grandad's birthday was exactly six months later on June 25th. She used to get upset that even though we would hold her party a week before Christmas very few people could come.

Grandad suggested that they share birthdays so we have always celebrated her birthday in June. Presents and cards given to her on Christmas day but she would then have friends round or a day out with her friends in June (no presents)

Grandad died several years ago but we still celebrate my sister's birthday in June and remember my Grandad at the same time.

piprabbit · 17/07/2010 22:42

As a January born person, I would have loved to have had one or two birthday parties in the summer.

It's bloody miserable always having parties inside on a cold wet day. I have dreamed of having an outdoor party on a lovely warm afternoon.

When I am old and wearing purple and a red hat that doesn't suit me, I will always have half-birthday parties.

chatee · 17/07/2010 22:42

we do celebrate half birthdays in this house but only because I was clever enough to have children on the same date but ?.6 years apart-only the birthday child gets a present(except from my parents when half birthday gets a small gift like a book)but both children get their own song

it's quite cute and does stop the "I'm 7 and a half comments starting -as both of them know when the other is exactly a half"

oh and just to blow the I'm a clever mummy scenario out of the window-i didn't really plan it-as it was a emergency c sec at 38 weeks

maryz · 17/07/2010 22:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

neolara · 17/07/2010 22:54

My ds was born on 28th December and it's absolutely pants. NO-ONE is around. Everyone seems to be caught up in family activities and few people (including myself) seem to have much enthusiasm for children's parties. He is only 3 and last year he had two friends around for his party. This is in contrast to his sister, who has a July birthday, and today had 16 friends to her party. (Although I do now appreciate this was complete madness.)

I have considered having a half year party for my ds because it seems very unfair on him.