to ask people to take their shoes off?

[loopyloops]

... just in one room, the one where DD crawls around. She's at an age where she picks up the tiniest little thing and puts in in her mouth.

Responses I've had (I always explain the reason why I ask them to):

"oh, my shoes are clean"
"I'd rather not, I'm not wearing socks"
"a bit of dirt won't hurt"
"oh but I'll have to put them on again when I leave"

...then there are the people who conveniently forget and you have to ask them every time they come round...
...and those who take heir shoes off but leave their kids' shoes on.

Am I being unreasonable? Over the top? Should I just forget the rule and let them traipse dog shit into my living room?

YANBU,

We have a general no shoes rule at our house- we sometimes don't ask new visitors to remove theirs (unless it's very wet outside) and sometimes if people ask we let them choose although most see our bare feet/socks and follow our lead. But friends/family all know this now (some did complain the first time), and come prepared with non-holey and matching socks/house slippers etc.

I never grew up with this rule, but i think it makes a lot of sense, as when my DCs take their shoes off at my parents house, their feet/socks are an illustration of just how mucky the floor is (even though it looks clean and is cleaned regularly). And my sister's carpet is so full of stains due to muddy shoes.

have wood floors downstairs then.

Or get a rug?

I hate taking my shoes off, though will do so grudgingly if asked. I find walking about barefoot for any long periods uncomfortable (due to a raised instep - poss from wearing shoes all the time but too late now). I also have cold feet & am vain enough to think my shoes complete my outfit. I'm actually not that keen on people walking about my house barefoot as I'm more grossed out by the thought of acquiring athletes foot or varucas than walking / crawling in the general dirt on shoes. We have large doormats & ask people to use them & if muddy obviously take them off. We have a friend who always brings his own slipppers!

As for inlaws keeping their shoes on - my guess is either bunions or raised / fallen arches from poorly fitted shoes when young OR habits formed in houses without central heating / with draughts.

Also what is this obsession with dog shit? Do you live in areas without poppa-scooping bylaws or just not look where you are walking?

I agree entirely with kittykitty's post.

YANBU, I really don't understand why people don't mind all the crap that's outside, on the floors in their own home!! One person said to me, "oh my shoes are clean!" and proceeded to walk dog shit through the hall. She was SO embarrassed!

But generally people don't mind as I have white floors. And I always take mine off when I go to other people's.

Hmm not saying that I subscribe to such nonsense but I am afraid that I was brought up to believe it was very bad manners to ask people to remove their shoes and also (prepares to be flamed)social suicide rather the same as using "serviettes ."
Obviously all ridiculous now but I confess I hate it and contrive not to visit people who I know will ask me to,it makes me feel unwelcome and uncomfortable.The only exception being if the weather is wet or muddy and then it is good manners to bring clean footwear .

Can't stand all this take your shoes off nonsense. Putting possessions before people. I'd love to just refuse, am far to polite. ANd where exactly is all this dog shit that people have all over their shoes all the time?

We have hard floors downstairs and a dog who casts hair.

We take our shoes off before walking upstairs so we don't walk doghair into the carpets. Sticks in the pile of the wool, drives me berserk.

If people don't offer then I will ask. I've had friends come round who have walked up the stairs in muddy shoes while admiring the new carpet then took them off before going in the tiled bathroom. That made me realise if I want people to take shoes off I need to ask them.

um, that's why they invented doormats.
problem solved.

Well, someone did walk into my house with dog shit said! I don't see how it's putting possessions before people - it's actually about keeping my floors clean - for the benefit of myself, family and friends - I don't actually give a toss about the wood itself! I just don't think it's nice - shoes are for outside imo. Perhaps I should have been born a Swede, I think is normal there?

I think you need to offer guests some slippers to wear if you have a no shoe policy in your home.

Some people really don't like not wearing shoes and it's easy enough to have a range of house shoes for them to choose from.

Oh dear, this has been illuminating. I HATE being asked to take my shoes off - you're telling me to change the way I've chosen to present myself and it makes me cross! You could provide paper slippers, I suppose, but then I'd feel as if I was in hospital.

What if I knew you were that pernickety and brought a change of shoes (assuming I had a very large handbag and could be arsed) - would that be acceptable? Because, if not, that proves you're being an overbearing control freak imo

My last flat had pale cream carpets and new oak floors. I wouldn't dream of insulting my guests by implying I valued my floor more than their choice of attire!

Maybe I should always wear my pyjamas to visit people's homes? At least they go with slippers.

Ondine, I won't wear borrowed shoes. The reasons should be obvious.

As others have said, what have people got against doormats? You can even get antibacterial, machine-washable ones

I would refuse to wear a pair of stupid 'house shoes' I'm so glad my mates think more of my company than their precious floors

Mind you, the new oak floor I mentioned was so smooth, we used to have skating parties on it - I provided woolly socks for that

Please come in PJs!

What is this trend for cream carpets? Cream has got to be the most impractical colour going - except for white.

Heh, loopy, think I will wear them next time I have to visit pompous SIL

Oh god this rings such a bell for me! I have recently moved and have very pale carpets that I know are going to be a mare to keep clean. I do ask people to take their shoes off, in an apologetic "I know I am fighting the inevitable but would you mind..." kind of way. People do (apart from one person who said her feet were too cold!! So we sat in the kitchen and I thought you rude cow- as she makes you take them off at hers! )

I do feel a bit hyacinth about it all but I really want to keep the house nice for as long as poss so I suffer the discomfort!

okaaay ... so how about putting dustsheets down when someone visits wearing [gasp] SHOES, grumpypumpkin? If you're going to be hysterical about your carpets, you may as well be honest! Also, it doesn't look too bad (as dustsheets are cream, like your carpet), neither does it require you to control what your guests wear.

Of course someone will bring dog shit into your house one day. But it's hardly the norm is it. And you're not constantly licking your floors are you? I might just tell people that my feet are covered in veruccas

Am going to learn how to walk an inch above the floor, since floors are evidently not meant to be walked on

Haha I know I really did not think I would ever be one of these people! . I despair at the future... cellophane kept on chairs, that plastic see through flooring that my gran had in the hall (on TOP of the carpets!)...
Once the carpet in the hall is ruined I shall replace with a wooden floor to spare myself the agonies!

Bourboncreme - yes I too was brought up to believe that asking guests to remove their shoes is akin to having a setee in the lounge - social suicide indeed

Oh, yes, I remember those plastic hall runners! Yup, better get yourself some nice furniture protectors too