The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Spring 2026

[REP22]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you only just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.
Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.
All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain. We don't encourage moderation-only here, as it can be triggering for some to read. If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there from those worthy people too. Keep trying. Sobriety may not be easy - but I guarantee you that it is worth it.
I started trying to give up drink in 2018, succeeded (mostly) in 2019 but had a few “wobbles”, one of which led me here in April 2023. I still struggle sometimes but the posters on this thread have been an absolute godsend of wisdom, support and encouragement, along with my dog - known here as Sid (not his real name), and they keep me going. I hope you find strength and comfort here too. This thread and its wonderful posters has been a lifesaver to many, and have certainly seen me through many good and not-so-good days.
These books were particularly helpful to me and I still go back to them from time to time: The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley (Amazon - Sober Diaries) and The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray (Amazon - Unexpected Joy). Others have found This Naked Mind by Annie Grace (Amazon - This Naked Mind) helpful. There are Apps that help track your AF journey, including Reframe and the ones I use, I Am Sober and TryDry. Podcasts can also be helpful. I have found One for the Road by Sober Dave to be a good listen. But different things work for different people. Feel free to post and ask. There is solidarity, wisdom and support here. This is a safe space where your voice will be heard, understood and valued.
Warmer weather is coming. Keep an eye out for that first daffodil waving in the breeze, and make yourself at home. It's going to be alright. x

Good morning shipmates, another lovely sunny day here. Sid is thinking about taking the cover off the quoits deck...

So glad you liked the exhibition @Carpetburn - I did take a little video of the portrait and other highlights to enjoy it for posterity, and there are a few Youtube clips of it. I've never been to Versailles and the last time I went to Paris, royal/revolutionary history wasn't a feature of the trip. I have got a very good little book from the 1950s called "The Way of the Tumbrils", where the various locations and revolutionary evils are visited and described and often think I would like to revisit armed with that and follow in the author's steps. Probably less safe these days though.

Sorry you're feeling a bit blue @Lavrander, @ThistimeImdone and @FiloPasty - I am very much in that camp at the moment too. We know it won't help, and will make things worse in the long-run, so why do we see it in rosy terms like we do? Definitely why we're here. Because we have seen enough of the consequences and the potential for further, permanent harm and we desire to be different. Someone on a different MN thread made a good analogy that chimed with me - that drinking is like being in a lift that is plummeting towards a doom-filled basement. We can push the button and step out of the lift to safety, or we can ride it all the way to the bottom. I don't want to be in that pit, but it is so, so hard to reach and press for that button. Because there is only one way down if we don't stop. I also think of the thread "The Reality of the End". I don't want that, for me or Sid. But it is very, very hard. But we are here and we are trying our best. That's worth celebrating. Keep going - we can do it. 💐💐💐

Top stuff on surviving Amsterdam @Adsy1988 - that can't have been easy. Victory is sweet. 🏋🏻‍♀️

Might the purple flowers be grape hyacinths @Lavrander ? Lots about at the moment - I love them. Hope Arthur-dog didn't bang his noggin too badly when he tumbled! Sid sleeps next to the wall, so is shielded from such things by my ample frame, hehe

Brilliant on 37 days @JK26 - hope the tacos were delicious. 🌮 That's so lovely that your DS wanted to cook for you.

Strength and courage. It will be alright. x

Very true at @REP22 and such a good analogy! Alcohol is far too romanticised isn't it?! Have to remember that. The life I am building is much better for no booze, just gotta keep going.

Gorgeous Sid ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Wow @Adsy1988 sober Amsterdam is quite the achievement. I have a trip there in a few months and we have been planning lots of wholesome activities. Any recommendations would be most welcome though.
Im sorry to hear that a few of us are having struggles but its reassuring to hear from folks like @WendyWagon that we get there over time.
It’s 100 days for me today which felt unthinkable back in November! I’m celebrating with a bit of self care!

Afternoon all.

I’ve been absent for about a week, apologies. I’ve had a few things going on which are mostly resolved now.

Sorry some of you are having a hard time. If it helps, I can recommend ChatGPT for somewhere to dump your thoughts and get some good feedback. I spend 95% of my day alone so it’s helpful to have some feedback without relying on my friends all the time.

Nice to see you again @TheMentalMentalLoad - no need for apologies at all. Glad you are still with us. x I've never engaged much with ChatGPT, though a few colleagues find it immensely helpful. It does offer very helpful, tailored guidance. 💐

100 days @Carpetburn - fantastic, powering up to goddess-level now. 🎉

Hope the house isn't too quiet without DS @WendyWagon - must be a relief to have him settled and enjoying the fairway.

whoop whoop @Carpetburn. 100 days is a brilliant achievement.

Thanks for the ChatGPT recommendation @TheMentalMentalLoadI hadn't thought of it for that although I use it daily for work; mostly 'I want to tell this person to shove it, help me tell them to shove it without saying "shove it."

I did arrange some meet ups with a couple of friends today and that made me feel a little lighter. I think when you're going through a bit of a rough time it can be all consuming. Just that action of deciding to do some things that aren't thinking about the all consuming thing or doing the all consuming thing has helped. I feel a bit more up in the clouds watching the traffic below this evening.

Yes @REP22they are crocuses! Thank you I looked them up. Lovely little flowers.

Morning all
Many congratulations on your 100 days @Carpetburn - brilliant work!!

Morning all.

Congratulations @Carpetburn

The DS is all out now. I've blubbed again. So final.
It's been a challenge living with him at times because he was forty at ten!
My late father did the school run and he had a special bond with him. My dad was a military man so everything was timed and controlled. The DS works on the same principles. Not for me squire!
I thought I might be tempted by the booze but I went to my boudoir instead.

Big cheese estate agent tomorrow but unless she has news of the cottage I'm not selling.

Congratulations @Carpetburn on reaching day 100, day 101 now! What an incredible achievement.

Amsterdam was good, done the usual sights, Red bus, Dam Square, RLD etc… Would have liked to have done Madame Tussaud’s but ran out of time sadly.

Hope everyone is well today. I was WFH yesterday and because of the wonderful sunshine I managed to get two washings done and dried outside. Feel sad saying it but that genuinely made my day 🤣.

Good morning shipmates,

Pleasure in the simple things should never be underestimated @Adsy1988 - getting some washing done, a bit of cleaning, a box or drawer sorted - these bring me joy too. And gentle, longer walks with Sid enjoying the birdsong and spring buds.

M said last night that she thinks Sid is "getting a bit chunky". He does tend to put on a bit of weight over the winter months (don't we all) but his harness is still comfortable. Unfortunately, he understood what she was talking about and was not impressed. A chubber indeed. 🙄 I am certainly tipping the scales as to what I should be (working on it, thanks to SW), but Sid is a lad in his physical prime. I am investigating the prospect of local dog fields for exercise purposes, as Sid is not generally allowed off-lead (occasionally he struggles to make the right choices in deer-based situations) but, as he has no concept of toys or play equipment, I fear it may just be a session of standing in a securely enclosed field. In the meantime, I will give him more decks to swab. 🧹 That ought to do it.

Hope you are OK @WendyWagon - it's another life-stage to get through, isn't it? It must seem very quiet in the house. But you will always be his lovely mum and he will always be your boy. 💐 Hope all goes well with the EA.

I'd be interested to hear what ChatGPT came up with for that scenario @Lavrander - I'm a bit of ChatGPT for that sort of thing at work. My managers laugh at some of my unfailingly civil messages in the direst of situations. One says that she can tell how annoyed I am by how polite my emails are - the more livid; the politer the response. But often the highest power lies in dignified silence. I do hope our PM does not respond to the nasty, idiotic jibes of FantaPants Manbaby spewed forth yesterday. Not Churchill indeed. No - because Churchill was a man doing what was right and best in the face of tyranny and evil, and a threat to us all, not someone inciting violence, death and fear for a variety of unspecified reasons. Sorry for getting all political, but it grinds my gears. I'd like to tell a lot of people to just "shove it betwixt the lips you never kiss with" - but that would harm me more than them in the end, I fear.

Sid has started muttering darkly about accessing "CatGPT". He wants me to look it up for him, but I'd fear for Parsnip (feline nemesis)'s safety, so I've told him the WiFi's down.

Strength and courage. Each new sober morning is a fresh new victory. Keep going. xx

What a lovely post @REP22 and you’ve hit the nail
on the head - the simple things in life really do bring the most joy. I’ve got a load waiting to be pegged out shortly.

I also like your description of that dreadful man over the pond who sadly, has lots of power without the common sense to go with it.

Im having another wobbly day but I’ll get there.

Thank you @TheMentalMentalLoad - I am so sorry you're having another wobbly day. They do get fewer as time goes on. It won't always be like this, I promise. I know you can power through it. You've got this. 💖 x

Thank you. I caught a nasty virus which is short lived but awful. I don’t want to say too much as I don’t want to be identifiable. (It involved a lot of trips to the bathroom) Both me and my DD have had it. She’s back to herself but I’m a bit behind and it’s stripped me bare both physically and emotionally. It’s brought up all sorts of worries about things I didn’t realise I was worried about that are quite irrational.

Still not on the booze though. That’s a massive win.

Morning all.

Stiff as a board this morning.

But we have sunshine. X

Afternoon everyone - lovely sunny day in the north today, amazing the difference the nice weather makes! It was one of my work colleagues' last day yesterday and we ended the work day with a drink in the pub, but I was pleasantly surprised to see a good selection of 0.0 drinks available so I had a zero beer whilst the others had halves of the proper stuff. I think my workmates were surprised, as usually I'd happily avail of a post-work drink but there were no questions asked.
We are having a leaving do on an evening in a couple of weeks where I might have to come clean... not sure how that is going to go down as there was a few of us that definitely made the most of the alcohol on a night out and I will stick out like a sore thumb with no drinking. I was fine on hols with OH and on the odd pub quiz, but this will be my first "night out-out" where I will have to deal with not drinking. Not that I think I will necessarily want to drink as I've definitely seen the benefits, but I'm more nervous about how other people will react and how I explain my reasons as I've not had to do that to anyone yet :/

@TheMentalMentalLoad - how are you today, do you think your virus has made your wobbly or has there been anything else to trigger it?

I've still not really delved into my triggers, I think a mix of possibly work stress and my relationship with my OH and I know I probably need to address both, but wanted to make sure I can cope, sober, first. 40 days today 😊

I’ve had a rough couple of weeks mood wise - been flat out with work and my diet took a hit. Previously I’ve had issues with binge eating which seemed to stop once I stopped drinking, but the last couple of week I’ve been going back to some bad habits. But…I didn’t drink a drop of alcohol (and didn’t feel the urge to either!). So a win in some ways - but I need to be more organised and troubleshoot before I get so tired in future.
Fast approaching 60 days now and the end of this thread. When it started I said I’d like to be here still at the end - nearly there!!

I’m pretty sure @JK26. I’ve been on chat GPT far too much though looking for reassurance and all I’m getting is confirmation that it is. My wobble isn’t making me want to drink, it’s just making me anxious and emotionally raw.

I’m also in a bit of a funk mood wise, not drinking just bad tempered. Think I just drowned it out with booze so now it’s a bit different real lifeing…

Hold on Shipmates better things await, hopefully!

Im thankful for my family. Annoying as they are, my health on a better track, and I’m getting some enjoyment and results from exercise. ADHD meds are helpful I think just not quite sure yet.

Ive just got quite a lot to do and need to get on with it.

Big hugs all around and head scratches for Sid and the other cute companions x

Morning shipmates
It’s not been a bad week for me as I’ve had some time off work. But it’s made me realise just how tired I am with the relentless pace of having a high stress job. I’m being much more boundaried at work recently and not drinking has certainly helped with my stress levels! I definitely feel much more capable these days than I did a few short months ago.
No exciting plans today but that’s quite nice. A lazy day planned! Steady sailing shipmates!

Sorry for those who are feeling grumpy or fragile.

I’ve been feeling great for a week or so - real pink cloud stuff - but took a nosedive halfway through yesterday and not sure why.

About to head off for another girls weekend (my second sober!) with a different group and struggling not to cancel. The older I get the less I look forward to large group socialising and there’s 14 of us. It’s not that drinking would make it better it’s more that if anything upset me or whatever I could always turn to drink before to drown it out. I feel positively scared.

Sending hand holds @eekwhatnow

Can you leave early if it feels too much? 14 is a LOT of voices, opinions and general noise.

@eekwhatnow that sounds tough, I hope you manage to have a nice, drama free weekend, and a sober one at that too. Just play it forward, how would you feel the next day after having a few?

So glad it’s Friday, every single day at the moment seems to be Groundhog Day in work, it’s never ending. Hopefully a quiet afternoon in store.

@eekwhatnow im in awe of you tackling these big events! I hope it all goes steady for you! An early night always helps once things start to get too rowdy! I have a bit of a trashy tv habit for real housewives of NY. Their drunkenness on any girls trip away makes me so happy not to be drinking. It’s real car crash tv. Hope there are no real housewife moments for you this weekend and it stays drama free.

Evening shipmates.
Rounding off the week with some banana bread and a couple of episodes of ER.
Better things do await for us, glimmers of sunshine.
Grateful today for my heated blanket.

@eekwhatnowI don’t think there’s any shame in cancelling if you don’t think you’re going to enjoy it. You deserve to put yourself first and if the planned weekend is going to cause you stress just say no! Tell the people pleaser in you to sit down, and do what serves you best! (I’ve got much better at this since turning 50 and becoming menopausal 😁)

For some weird reason this evening I’ve had my first real cravings and it’s shocked me how persistent they feel even though tomorrow is day 60. I have no idea where they’ve come from, but thoughts of a glass of wine/prosecco have crept in today.
“Why not? Just one? Why can’t I do what other people mange to do?”
I know the answers. DH has also stopped drinking now and I told him. It was nice to offload and he opened two Corona Cero’s and I’m now in the bath feeling much more level. It’s good to know that the feeling will pass - it just took me by surprise.

@Lavrander- god I loved ER. What series are you watching? I’m praying that The Pitt comes to UK channels soon - it looks like a modern reincarnation (although I’m sure Noah Whiley would deny this!)