The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Spring 2026

[REP22]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you only just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.
Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.
All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain. We don't encourage moderation-only here, as it can be triggering for some to read. If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there from those worthy people too. Keep trying. Sobriety may not be easy - but I guarantee you that it is worth it.
I started trying to give up drink in 2018, succeeded (mostly) in 2019 but had a few “wobbles”, one of which led me here in April 2023. I still struggle sometimes but the posters on this thread have been an absolute godsend of wisdom, support and encouragement, along with my dog - known here as Sid (not his real name), and they keep me going. I hope you find strength and comfort here too. This thread and its wonderful posters has been a lifesaver to many, and have certainly seen me through many good and not-so-good days.
These books were particularly helpful to me and I still go back to them from time to time: The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley (Amazon - Sober Diaries) and The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray (Amazon - Unexpected Joy). Others have found This Naked Mind by Annie Grace (Amazon - This Naked Mind) helpful. There are Apps that help track your AF journey, including Reframe and the ones I use, I Am Sober and TryDry. Podcasts can also be helpful. I have found One for the Road by Sober Dave to be a good listen. But different things work for different people. Feel free to post and ask. There is solidarity, wisdom and support here. This is a safe space where your voice will be heard, understood and valued.
Warmer weather is coming. Keep an eye out for that first daffodil waving in the breeze, and make yourself at home. It's going to be alright. x

@REP22 hope you are OK, a difficult situation. Hope Sid gave you lots of cuddles.

@ElusiveHope keep going. Glad you've been able to have honest conversations with DH. Tomorrow will be a week! 💪

@elusivehope DS said to me, 'Mum, you're looking well tonight'. I couldn't help thinking that it was because I'd had a few days off the poison

100% - you have a great cheerleader in your son! It feels so good when you get a compliment like that. Well done!

Thanks so much everyone for the supportive words. I have no desire to drink today.

On the one hand I feel very frustrated with myself for not having 'got' this yet, but on the other hand I feel like my mindset is so much better than it was. Keeping my drinking secret was holding me back from getting better if that makes sense. When I first started posting here last summer, I hadn't told a soul. Being honest here has helped me get more honest in real life. I've started to share openly at recovery meetings (after literal YEARS of going to meetings and pretending to be sober, wtf). And now DH knows as well. I feel lighter.

My anxiety and depression are also so much better than they were, thanks to the increased dose of SSRIs I'm on (they can pry my 40mg of citalopram out of my cold dead hands as far as I'm concerned 😂). I have absolutely no reason to drink apart from the fact that my habit of using it as an everyday coping mechanism is so deeply ingrained.

Today is a relatively low-stress day but tomorrow my schedule is crazy: an early morning meeting followed by five hours of teaching. Normally three hours in a day is pretty much all I can manage. Hopefully I can do all the prep today and then get through tomorrow, making sure I have time to eat nourishing food at regular intervals (forgetting to eat when I'm busy is one of my tendencies).

@Adsy1988 enjoy Amsterdam, that sounds fab!

In frivolous news, I ordered a set of large (350ml) Le Creuset rainbow mugs. We had a set years ago, but most of them are now chipped or broken, so I decided to replace them. I found a discounted set online, but they were still expensive.

Anyway they have just arrived and I am SO happy with them. Bright rainbow colours that will fill me with cheer whenever I drink teas and coffees throughout the day. Another small incentive to stay sober.

Sometimes I make excellent shopping decisions even if I do say so myself 😍

Afternoon shipmates.

I woke up a bit disoriented after yesterday's blubbering.
My upset was part self realisation that I won't have help with my care and cooking. The DH struggles to fry an egg!
The DS loves cooking and playing Dr Kildare!

Keep going fellow shopper @elusivehope

Aww @WendyWagon sympathies about your DS moving out. It's definitely a kind of grieving process. Every time my older DS goes back to uni after a vac, I feel bereft.

Kudos to you for raising a man who can cook.

When it comes to shopping, the things I succumb to aren't usually jewellery or clothes (unlike you I have very little sense of style!), but when it comes to crockery and kitchen stuff, I'm very susceptible. I could easily spend £££ on Le Creuset and Cornishware if I had the funds.

Le Creuset, so spenny, but so lush! I have a massive casserole dish that is Le Creuset, my favourite kitchen item. Would love the mugs, but don’t think I could justify the price (I can only imagine what you paid, @elusivehope). Enjoy a lovely cuppa out of them.

Sorry I’ve been reading but not posting much lately, but got lured back in with talk of ape Creuset - LOVE

Saw online about an amazing in person sample sale once and am desperate to go. Mine was all bought about 20 years ago the current prices are insane, but I love it all

Ha, it's good to hear from others who share my Le Creuset obsession. I also have a massive casserole dish, and it gets a lot of use.

DH came home and saw the mugs and was a bit bemused (my explanation of how we NEEDED them failed to impress him, oddly enough). Oh well. There are some things men cannot understand 😂

We'll use the mugs every day though! (I'm still justifying my extravagance to myself.)

Hello my sober crewmates!
Celebrating 50 days today and 9lbs lighter. Here’s to the next 50!

<peeks round the corner....> Can I join you guys? Spent much of this evening reading posts from the start and wished I'd found you sooner!
After years of drinking too much, mostly every night at home, but then creeping into day-drinking over lockdown and on the WFH days recently I've had some pretty rotten days experiences, but that's nothing compared to what my family have had to put up with :(

I tried to address it last year with moderation and 'no-midweek-drinking' alongside some support from the local ChangeGrowLive alcohol service but then massive binges at the weekend I realised that every weekend was getting too messy and it was ruining the relationship with my OH and our DCs

I wasn't alcohol dependant and had had dry periods before but never managed a full Sober-tober or Dry January. I'm 32 days sober today and I'm fully committed to staying sober. I've done a pub quiz and been on a mini-break abroad with AF options which was a massive hurdle overcome and has reinforced that I can be strong enough to do this and try and repair the relationship with my OH.

Anyway, rambling now, wanted to come and say "Hi" and hopefully keep checking in to see how everyone is doing - you're all so inspirational so thank you to all the regulars for sharing their stories 🤗

Welcome @JK26 sounds like you are doing a fantastic job.

@WhatMaggieDid well done for 50 days and 9lbs down! I'm a few days behind you but sadly not getting any slimmer. I put on weight after ditching the booze. My next goal is to loose what I've put on and then some....

Morning all.
Welcome @JK26

The joy of disability. I've got this bed handle thing to get me up but it does have a reading light!
The Rituximab appears not to have worked this time. One more big gun to try.

The plot thickens on the house saga. The local agent has been chasing us to list. They've two others on the development but ours is the biggest. They have now reduced the faux Georgian one (looks good but has a potholed drive). I'm not sure what to make of it as I got the big boss this time saying we have people looking. I never saw any of them prior to Christmas. Anyone else selling and finding it tricky?

Morning all.
Congratulations on your 50 days @WhatMaggieDid 👏👏

Welcome @JK26 and well done on getting to 32 days, through some big challenges

Welcome @JK26. Well done for 32 days and for the experiences you've had sober. That's great! Resonated with lockdown!

Great work on 9lb down @WhatMaggieDidand for your 50 days. After losing after giving up I am sadly creeping back up again but I think it's the hibernation biscuits. I've stopped buying them now and got myself a fruit box.

How are you @REP22?

Morning!
@WendyWagonam not selling but certainly noticed houses near me being on the market for a long time and they just seem to be being reduced over and over. There are some that just get snapped up but I think they're priced lower than they want for a quick sale. My friend is looking for a little place and they're gone before she can look round!

Late night and early morning today. Got a big guns presentation for work today . Gulp. Thank goodness I don't have the alcohol fog along with the tiredness. I don't know how I managed before. I remember I used to forget words mid sentence. Haven't done that in a while.

Am a bit late saying it but hello @elusivehope! So glad you're feeling a step forward after opening up to your husband even though it was hard. I'm incredible envious of the mugs. I have them in and out my basket across the year. They are JOYFUL.

Morning all.
I might get out for a food shop today.

I'll post if I see any after bargains.

Afternoon all, thanks for the welcome.

OH been working away this week, back tonight - 'old-me' would have definitely been have been WFH and cracking open some early afternoon drinks for some solo drinking and have been messy when the kids got back but I'm pleased that the corner has been turned and I can be a proper parent.

Been busying myself in the evenings with some house cleaning and tidying - isn't it wonderful how much time and energy you have when you're not drinking! Although I have been feeling far sleepier, earlier than I would be normally - come 11 I'm pretty much ready for bed whereas OH is happy staying up with TV and a cider for a good couple more hours.

How does everyone else cope when their partner still drinks (sensibly) and you don't? I don't begrudge them continuing to drink - although it is most nights - I definitely can't judge and it doesn't bother/trigger me, but I do get the impression that the thing that we enjoyed the most was drinking together... :(

Ah @JK26I have the same issue with my husband. I found it hard at first because I felt that the way we connected was to basically get drunk and chat shit.
All I can say is we're used to it a bit now. One thing we do now is he sits in the kitchen having a beer whilst I cook and we chat a lot there and then we go out for more walks together, and I find over time we've started getting that easy flow of conversation about our days that only really happened when I'd got a glass of wine in my hand.
However, I do get annoyed still when he over does it which is rarer than at was but still frustrating - mostly because he becomes really boring! And I don't want to be around a boring person. The other thing we started to do is go to the gym together- it's a fancy one with a sauna .. your mileage may vary! But it was kind of nice to just sit together in a place where drinking was just not an option.

@JK26 welcome, you’ve done so well to get over the hard yards. My husband is a moderate drinker but over the last few months seems to have cut down so much, he doesn’t buy anything now so there’s nothing in the house and often if we go out for dinner he often just has a soft drink with me. I think he’s seen such an improvement in me that he wants to do the same, or is just being supportive. I’m sure he’ll still drink on holidays etc but I think it’s really made him have a look at his own relationship with alcohol.

just finished season 4 of bridgerton, loved it!

Hope everyone hanging on, have we heard from @Becky3825? Hope she’s ok x

Hello shipmates, Sid and I are back after having a rough couple of days. Sending you all love and good wishes. Welcome @JK26 - I'm very glad you have found us.

@Lavrander - alas, @Becky3825 hasn't been around for a while now. I really hope all is well.

Strength and courage brave shipmates. All shall be well. x

Good to see you @REP22. Please pass on cuddles to Sid, and be sure to let him look after you? He knows you will do the same for him when the need arises.

Thank you @ShyMaryEllen - he is sitting on my feet as I write. Just about to take him out. He's a good boy. xx

HI @Lavrander and @FiloPasty - thanks for your comments,I know it's like I needed the booze to get to chatty stage - now when there's a mismatch it's a bit more difficult. Hopefully when we're reunited this evening we'll have a lot to catch up on from our weeks, keeping fingers crossed for a nice sensible evening - my Friday nights are not what they used to be for sure although I do think my sobriety is rubbing off a little bit so we may both turn into sensible (not boring!) non-drinkers!