The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Spring 2026

[REP22]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you only just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.
Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.
All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain. We don't encourage moderation-only here, as it can be triggering for some to read. If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there from those worthy people too. Keep trying. Sobriety may not be easy - but I guarantee you that it is worth it.
I started trying to give up drink in 2018, succeeded (mostly) in 2019 but had a few “wobbles”, one of which led me here in April 2023. I still struggle sometimes but the posters on this thread have been an absolute godsend of wisdom, support and encouragement, along with my dog - known here as Sid (not his real name), and they keep me going. I hope you find strength and comfort here too. This thread and its wonderful posters has been a lifesaver to many, and have certainly seen me through many good and not-so-good days.
These books were particularly helpful to me and I still go back to them from time to time: The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley (Amazon - Sober Diaries) and The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray (Amazon - Unexpected Joy). Others have found This Naked Mind by Annie Grace (Amazon - This Naked Mind) helpful. There are Apps that help track your AF journey, including Reframe and the ones I use, I Am Sober and TryDry. Podcasts can also be helpful. I have found One for the Road by Sober Dave to be a good listen. But different things work for different people. Feel free to post and ask. There is solidarity, wisdom and support here. This is a safe space where your voice will be heard, understood and valued.
Warmer weather is coming. Keep an eye out for that first daffodil waving in the breeze, and make yourself at home. It's going to be alright. x

Attagirl @WendyWagon - knew you'd rock it! x

Ooh, The Devil Wears Givenchy! 😈 Well done, Weasel-Buster @WendyWagon ! 🙌 Ain't ya proud of yourself?! Wendy for the Win!

@WhatMaggieDid great advice from everyone else - I'd just add to think of yourself as really thirsty and in need of a big, refreshing fizzy water (or diet Coke if you must... 😉) to start the evening.

The big pinch point for me was always the first ten minutes. But once the others have their first drink in, they really will not notice yours, nor do they need big explanations - and the buzz of clarity and success when you get through an event like that FAR outweighs the shabby and transient buzz of alcohol!

Also, maybe send yourself some inspiring notes on your phone, and refer to them as needed.

@WendyWagon yay!! Well done!
@WhatMaggieDid I would be feeling exactly the same way as you. I think @Onewildandpreciouslife’s advice is really good. Seeing these early experiences as experiments to find the non alcoholic options I like most has definitely been helping (and surprising) me. You also may find if you’re not drinking they automatically drink less too.

Well done @WendyWagon!

l have taken to my bed as this cold is getting more like flu. I will take a Covid test tomorrow if it’s not better.

Really sorry to hear you're feeling so rough @ShyMaryEllen I hope you feel much better very soon. Sending love and Lemsip x

Thank you so much everyone, some amazing advice - I have read every word and screen shotted it to my phone. I'm excited in a way, especially reading what @Onewildandpreciouslife said about seeing a show sober. Last year I did one day at a festival without drinking and I loved it. I have so many great memories of that day that I wouldn't have if I'd been drinking, so I can only imagine the theatre will be just as good.
I will keep you all in my pocket like little sober Borrowers 😁

Evening shipmates!
So pleased @WendyWagon thst you kicked some weasel arse while looking SUBLIME!
I’m blooming knackered tonight and it’s only Tuesday. Off for an early night! Steady sailing folks.

Any other stationary lovers? On day 1, I treated myself to one of those beautiful Papier wellness journals to help keep me accountable. Each one lasts for 3 months, you fill in a double page each day and there are weekly and monthly check ins. Have just got to my first monthly check in and reflecting back, I really feel like it’s helped.

Morning all.

Another mad tidy up beckons for the national Estate agents calling this afternoon. Last try before i have a stair lift put in.
I hate cleaning but my cleaner disappeared at Christmas and ive only been offeted men. I have enough of Toxic Tommys in fhe workplace i dont want them in my house. How do you tell these companies females only? Will I get sued? Some days I'm too ill to get dressed so I'd feel vulnerable.

Nothing to report. Hospital tomorrow.

I wish I were better at journaling @eekwhatnow . I buy lots of lovely notebooks but they tend to get filled with to do lists and notes. I think it’s really helpful to journal to see how far you’ve come but I never seem to manage it!

@Onewildandpreciouslife I am often the same but this one has prompts so you sort of have to do what it tells you. Which is frustrating and useful in equal measure!

New victory last night, I dreamed that I was the designated driver at a party so didn’t drink alcohol whilst everyone else did!! I crashed the car due to it being stuck in reverse and the brakes not working but nobody was injured & I WAS SOBER! I’ve had many dreams about being drunk over the last 30 night so this feels like a win 🤩

I celebrated my first (non pregnant) sober birthday this week and it was great! Focused on fun activities and lots of good food rather thsn using my birthday as an excuse to drink as much as possible.

Think I posted about this before but my birthday last year was the trigger for me to realise I really needed to think about stopping. Had tickets to a show in london. Tickets were over £100 each. Went in early, before lunch. Started drinking on the train. More with lunch. Then a fancy cocktail bar. A pub. Wine with dinner. Pre bought drinks at the theatre. Basically blacked out the whole show, couldn't remember a thing. Was devastated. And so embarrassed. And god the money we spent. Probably best part of £300 just on booze. In one day. I did enjoy it (until the black out) but the whole day was based around our next drink. It controlled everything. I am SO much happier now 😀

Hello all, just checking in. I have slipped again, but I'm sober today. I'm hoping that at least my periods without a drink are getting longer, and the relapses/slips fewer and further between. I have various women from the local women's AA meeting texting me now, which is nice (I feel like I need to seize all the support I can get).

@WendyWagon I loved the description of you at your meeting - fabulous!

And @ShyMaryEllen I hope you feel better soon!

I'm feeling very unmotivated work-wise today, but I'm trying to go easy and just make not drinking my main goal of the day.

My (addict) brother posted something on fb and it's actually the first confirmation I've had in a few months that he's still alive. Anyway I'm relieved about that.

Wishing everyone a peaceful day xxx

I forgot to congratulate you on your year, @HorrorFan81 ! That's fantastic!

Thanks @elusivehope - I actually ended up drinking a few more weeks after by bday last year so I hit one year on 16 Feb 😀 not long now. Considering a social media post but havent decided yet...

Afternoon everyone
Happy Birthday for this week @HorrorFan81. So glad you had a lovely time.

@WendyWagonyou're absolutely within your rights to ask for a female cleaner. It's your home and involves personal access to you and your space. You won't get sued.

I've been feeling shattered all this week. Can't believe it's still January.

Happy birthday @HorrorFan81 🥳 I am sorry that your theatre birthday was grim - but it sounds like it was a springboard to the fantastic gift of the life you now have, definitely worth celebrating.

That's a definite win @TwoNicePuppies - I have dreams like that. Occasionally Sid is at the wheel. He'll do anything to get on 'Police Interceptors'... 😉

Hope you're mending soon @ShyMaryEllen - my M had lurgy that persisted (Sid and I managed to get her to interact properly with pharmacist and GP in the end and she needed some antibiotics to finally kick it over). Hope your DH is on hand with comfort, assistance and Lemsip. x

@elusivehope - sorry about the slip, be kind to yourself. I've certainly been there myself. You're still going strong. It will be alright. x

@WendyWagon - I agree with @Lavrander - your space, you can have what you want. We've got a cleaning company AND a driving instructor company in our area that are ladies-only and proudly so. Hope you can find someone to suit. x

@Lavrander - I'm feeling knackered too. It's like the January that wouldn't die. After the Triangle of Goats last week, today the Four Horsemen of the Necropolis cantered brazenly into view. 🐎 Safely ushered back from whence they came, but really... We're nearly at February. On the 14th it will be three years to the day since I first met Sid. Not sure where those years have gone, but much of them have been spent on here, and very gratefully so.

Strength and courage, bravest of shipmates. We are going to make it. It will be OK. xx

@eekwhatnow yes, I love stationery! I wish I had bought a journal and filled it out when I went AF, but I didn't. I think I would have found it very helpful to read back when I have cravings. I'm worried about the "fade affect bias". I love that you have a journal, and that it's helped you.

@WendyWagon I hope the cleaning and the visit from the estate agent both went well. I do not feel comfortable with males in my home either, so I hope you find a nice female cleaner. And (a belated) congratulations on the success in your meeting- it's very inspiring, especially given how unwell you feel. Good luck at hospital again tomorrow.

Thanks for the good wishes. I’ve had another day in bed, dozing and waking, but catching up on some well-needed sleep has to be for the best.

I love stationery too. My problem (well, one of them😉) is that I hate writing on the first page. I think it should only have profound and original thoughts on it, written in copperplate. As I’m not full of such thoughts, and write like a drunken spider I have a shelf of unused notebooks.

Congratulations on your sober dream @TwoNicePuppies definitely a win!
Congratulations to you too @HorrorFan81 on enjoying your birthday so much more than last year, and for feeling so much happier now, that's so lovely to hear.

Hello @elusivehope sending love and support, and well done for climbing back aboard, you're doing great.
Sending "un-shattered-ness" wishes to you @Lavrander and @REP22 Spring is on it's way and hopefully that will bring more energy all round, along with all the beautiful bulbs, and some sunshine!
More get well wishes to you @ShyMaryEllen I am 100% with you on the writing on the first page- just like on my textbooks at school!

@eekwhatnow the journalling is such a good idea. I might nick it. I love to journal but it's fallen by the way side in recent times and would be a lovely sober activity to rediscover.

@HorrorFan81 congratulations on the year sober, I find that really inspirational

I'm shattered too and really looking forward to January ending in a few short days.

I was thinking of you all today as I saw a social media post about Chrissy Teigen being 52 days alcohol free. She was alcohol free for a few years and thought she could go back to the occasional glass of wine but it ended up with her slipping into day drinking and an even worse problem. It was a good reminder that even with all the support she presumably has with the privileges of fame and wealth, she could not control going back to drinking. Found it a really powerful reminder, I'm so glad many public figures are now open about this, really normalises it.

Just checking in. Feeling a bit tired and overwrought this evening. Nothing to do with not drinking. Just a long and tiring month. I had a little weep earlier and felt better! I used to cry all the time so it feels quite healthy to just have a stress blub!
Nowt a good nights sleep won’t fix. I’ve got a hospital appt Friday and although it’s “to rule anything out” rather than an obvious issue I think it’s playing on my mind a bit.
Im certainly a much more rational person these days when it comes to managing life in general.
Solidarity to everyone here dealing with the various ups and downs of life!