Dry January and beyond - Thread 2

[BulldogMumma]

Hey everyone
New thread as the old one was filling up
@Flicitytricity @coastergirl @TimeForNosecco

Evening all
Well today at work was horrendous, really stressful day and the temptation for wine was real, it only lasted a few minutes though but I played it forward in my head and imagined myself waking up hungover tomorrow and the temptation soon went away.
Forgot to buy the batteries for my scales again!! I will definitely do it tomorrow.
Day 28 done and dusted

Day 29. Shocking day at work and at home but I’m dry. Thank god it’s not a weekend otherwise I’d be in trouble. As it is, I’m breathing through the urge. Early night for me I think.

13k kcals, 208units, £253 all saved.
If you have the trydry app, look at the insights it's really interesting. I love the badges you can get too for doing certain things sober that you would normally do with booze.

I’m going out on a limb to say the Try Dry app could be SO much better than it is, it’s so basic! What I really hate is that you can’t reset data since you joined… or choose a time period in question.

it opens to total by default which is rubbish if you used it last year for a couple of months then stopped using it and came back to it. All the stats are meaningless. Yes I know I can click month or year… but all the insights are useless too as based on the total period. I emailed them about this and they said they’d had loads of requests but no resources to do it. I have to cancel account and sign up with a different email address. Also… calories and money saved are so wrong. I spent £20 on a bottle of wine not £9… and instead of a wine I might have a non alcoholic beer that still has calories! You should be able to set yourself how much each drink saved is worth in both price and calories.

it can’t be that hard with that many users.

Evening all.
Now that we are approaching the end of January (hurrah) I can more confidently say I'm keen to continue, and would defo like to keep on hearing others' updates as I have found it all so helpful.

Had a great weekend for a number of reasons connected to NOT drinking such as-
Has said I'd treat myself to a nice new jumper in the sale from a lovely local (bit expensive) shop if I managed Dry Jan.
I know we are not quite at the end but I went in on Saturday and bought one!
Felt a bit guilty as we are trying to be frugal but then I thought to myself that what I spent on the jumper less than half what id usually have spent on alcohol in the month..and I felt somewhat better about it!
On Sunday my sis and family were over and she and BIL commented on how well I looked and what a nice jumper I was wearing.. :))) Small wins...

9300 calories and £146 saved. However I have eaten my own body weight in chocolate this month to handle the sugar cravings so that calorie deficit is irrelevant 🤪

£149 and 8000 calories saved!

Morning all day 29! 🤩
What a long month, glad Jan is almost done as for the no drinking it has been an eye opener how difficult I’ve found the past 3 weeks considering I’ve had a few dry spells.
This for me signals that I don’t have full control when it comes to alcohol because it’s been such a struggle and the cravings have been so strong.
Thankfully I haven’t gave in but it’s not been easy and I’ve definitely wanted to drink, I’m still educating myself on the negative effects of alcohol and that has helped massively.
Definitely feel 💯 better health wise and am loving having my sleep rhythm's fixed once again! That’s always the first thing that turns to shit when I drink.
still feeling a bit meh! but that’s something that will take time I guess I’m evolving I’m a very different person without alcohol so it’s like getting to know myself without it.
Planning to continue and see where this leads me but feeling positive and confident that this is where I should be.
well done to everyone 🤩

Well done all.
I will have had 2 drink days out of the whole of Jan so I consider that a massive win. Once I got out of the mindset of all of nothing it was easier.
This January feels so bloody long and dark and dreary.

Morning all @BigButtons & @TimeForNosecco i hear you & well done!!!

it has been long and miserable!!

i was chatting to my sister last night & we were reminiscing about last Jan and I really struggled with dry Jan last year but it really has been ok this year!

I am quietly confident that if I had drunk it would have felt even more miserable & I wouldn’t remember half of it!! I’m trying to look at the bulbs in the garden daily to reassure myself spring is coming!!

this week I have started to notice a difference in my focus and concentration particularly at work it is definitely getting better!! I was putting my issues with it down to perimenopause. I suspect it does play a part but I’m now thinking the alcohol might have been playing a bigger part than I thought!! I’ve managed to complete a couple of things I’ve been procrastinating over!!

anxiety still a big issue and v hormone driven but hoping that too may improve over time! Am finding herbal teas help a bit which is something I wouldn’t have considered at all pre dj!!

just read in the joy of being sober that the neural pathways recover fully 6-12 months af! It made me feel excited to see what I’m like at that point!! I’m hoping to regain the clarity of my 30’s 🤣 may not be realistic but time will tell!!!

Day 29...and day 2 of eating crap and sugary stuff as if my life depended on it!
Don't know what triggered that this week more than any other.

I'm surprised at how hard the wine witch is calling to me this week! Maybe she knows I'm breaking the drought on Friday evening, sitting down to watch Traitors US! 🤭

The bit that follows will be the hard bit, knowing that I'm 'allowed' to drink.

I feel the same Fordian. Thought I was on the home run but tonight is hard. I will NOT fall this close to the finish.

@Fordian 100%! I've never thought about wine as much as I have this week, I think our brains know it's nearly the end of January.
Well day 29 successfully completed 👍.
How have we all found January (besides being a million days long)? I've found it easier than I thought I would but I have had days that have been tougher than others.
I was planning to have a drink on Saturday night but I'm enjoying the clear headed mornings so I might carry on as I am

It's the zero hangovers which are making it so much easier.
I breeze through Mondays now too.
Thought of a wine headache or nausea from binge drinking the night before is enough to keep going.
I have a feeling that on Saturday I may get the "oh well January is over now" feeling so I have my Trip subscription arriving tomorrow ready for it.
I have CBD vape juice as well and I find it's really helping me with the booze twitch. ( I was planning on giving up vaping all together too but one vice at a time. )

Day 29 done. Like you, @BulldogMumma, I've found it easier to get through Jan than I thought, but there have been twinges now and again. Like tonight, but I know that's a habit trigger because of getting home after a couple of days away with work when I used to kick back with a nice glass of white. I love waking up feeling fresh and full of energy, but haven't really lost as much weight as I was expecting to, grr.

I had her hounding me tonight but I poured an AF drink instead into a wine glass, reminded myself I have work tomorrow and finished up done paperwork I had to do.

I really struggled the first 3 weeks but I feel I’ve turned a corner now so I will be remaining AF for as long as possible and taking it day by day as this is what seems to work for others as oppose to telling myself I’m never drinking again!
just concentrate on the day in hand and not going to give it much of my time the mental gymnastics of moderating have been driving me insane it’s just a drink it doesn’t deserve that amount of power!
i wish everyone all the best in whatever you decide to do and a massive well done! We should feel proud we have at least given ourselves a re set and a great health kick to the start of the year!! Let’s carry on making better choices in 2025 🙌🏻

I've found DJ way easier than I thought and so I'm up for 100 days, sober spring or whatever else they are calling it. Last January I had a drink on 23rd after an annoying evening meeting. I think I had less resolve and was blasé as I was really only aiming to moderate.
I have successfully moderated all year with the app and have stayed within and under guidelines. I think that's why I'm now up for knocking it on the head.

I woke this morning with an immediate jag of a headache and a dry mouth as I 'came to', annoyed at having drunk too much last night and forgetting to hydrate and take Ibuprofen before bed, irritated that a hangover would dog at least my morning.

Then I remembered that I hadn't been drinking 😡

Fortunately it's subsided into a very mild background pain, now, but I'm pissed off that I'm not springing joyfully out of bed, ready to greet the day, after 29 AF days! And I wish I'd lost some -any!- weight!

However, in the spirit of balanced honesty, it has been useful to me discover how much of my general 'meh' is alcohol induced, and how much is 'just me'! Which doesn't mean I'll carry on as before after DJ. I did DJ to see if I could stop for any period of time, and to reset the ridiculous habit of drinking every night.

So my aim is moderation; I've had some fun, funny and amazing times with a few drinks on board over my 40 years of drinking, so obviously, I like a drink 😂 but I want to reassociate it as being a treat, not a habit.

I'm hoping the motivator for re-learning moderation is the knowledge that if I fail, the options are the continuing, insidious slow destruction of my health, or abstinence 😬

I recognise that many people have found the constant 'bargaining' of moderation to be too much head-noise, which of course I may also. But I will try, as I'm not ready to give up alcohol altogether, yet (?).

However, with no piss-on-chips intended, here, so many 'newly sober' friends over many decades evangelised about how incredibly, unbelievably transformed their AF lives now are! - then subsequently went on to drink more than me! I think they wanted to believe that they'd found the 'fix' for all the ills in their lives, which is completely understandable, but not realistic. Going AF didn't fix the reasons why they were drinking too much, they remained unexplored, thus unaddressed, thus ready to hijack them again.

I know why I drank too much: habit. It's past 6 o clock, dinner prep = wine; low level, low grade constant worry about my DS2, 23, drifting post degree; Post menopause, fat and a bit 'can't be bothered' listlessness; and finally, I love how that first glass feels. It's not replicated in the third glass, but by then, I don't care.

I'll shut up now!

Good post and I hear what your saying, I agree it’s only the first drink that I love and desperately want but would I stop there probably for awhile but I’ve been on this rollercoaster long enough and I can’t fool myself into thinking it won’t be only be one glass 3 months down the line. Once I start it creeps up pretty fast and I’ll be arranging dinners and brunches and my diary will be filled of fun and booze filled nights!
good luck to you and I wish you every success in moderation I really don’t want to give up alcohol but I know how my pattern works!

@TimeForNosecco yes, enough people have told me the same thing about moderation, especially if previously your drinking was heading into 'the problem zone'; that you begin the 'one more won't hurt'/ 'yeah! See you down the pub later!' -spiral. I could easily imagine that might be me 😬

Hopefully you can I genuinely wish you/ everyone who wants to moderate every success in an ideal world we would all want that for ourselves.
I will miss a holiday cocktail or a drink with dinner I’m a long way off from feeling ok about it but I know I would just ruin all the hard work I’ve put in!! 😅 I’m waiting for my brain to catch up and realise we ain’t doing that anymore!

I also found it a lot easier this year and may continue into February without a set target.
Not planning to go teetotal.
I really enjoyed being a part of this thread even though I only posted a couple of time so thank you for creating it @BulldogMumma all the regular posters for keeping it going

I'm actually amazed I've managed almost 30 days without a glass (bottle!) of wine.
My reasons for drinking were also habit, then losing my mum I told myself I had a reason to drink because I'm grieving. The reality is I'm grieving whether I'm drinking or not, drunk or sober, the fact she's gone is the same. I was drinking too much before mum passed away but losing her gave me a pass if you like. Ironic that I was drowning my grief with the very thing that killed her.
It's nearly a year since she passed away and I've found dealing with her loss so much easier being sober. My relationship with my partner has improved too.
I'm still 50/50 about drinking again, I don't want the fuzzy head anymore but equally I don't think I can go forever without a drink, DJ has really helped me to reset my relationship with alcohol and give my body a rest. Whatever happens I won't be going back to a bottle a night