Anyone else drinking almost 2 bottles of wine a night?

[Peaky777]

i’m drinking nearly two bottles of wine most nights. Sometimes I go weeks without drinking but when I’m on it, I’m on it. I drink nearly two bottles in about 4 hours. I know this isn’t right. I don’t really get a hangover but I do feel ‘jaded’ and I stumble over my words. I’m scared I’m going to lose everything. My husband works in another country so he doesn’t know. My children are older so spend time away from the house with their partners but we’re all so close. Nobody knows. My daughter even said the other day that she’s glad I’m not ‘one of those lonely mums who drinks on her own’…I’m exactly this person! So, I want to ask, has anyone drank this much but managed to stop or cut back without using AA? I just can’t bear the idea of this. I know I should consider it but I can’t . Any help or advice is appreciated.

My OH drinks two bottles of wine a day minimum. He is an alcoholic. Lovely bloke, kind, funny, functioning but a drinker. If you can, give up.

Sorry it’s late but wanted to suggest trying these as a replacement to wine

https://www.sainsburys.co.uk/gol-ui/SearchResults/Trip

Two bottles of wine a night not a week. . This is a serious drinking problem. Maybe think about going to the AA meetings.

This was me, for 15+ years. Couldn't sleep without it.
I started using Mounjaro 6 months ago and now the thought of wine turns my stomach.
Unexpected but welcome side effect.

Me. I drank a frightening amount and never thought I’d be able to give up. I’m 8 years now without touching a drop and can honestly say it’s the best thing I’ve ever done for my self, and I genuinely don’t miss it or think about it. I NEVER would have believed it possible.

First step is recognising it’s an issue and wanting to sort it out. I picked up Alan Carr Easy Way to Control Alcohol with no expectation or pressure and it changed my life. I really recommend it.

The joy of waking each day with energy, grateful to be free of the guilt and shame of not being able to go a night without buying alcohol on the way home despite swearing each morning I wouldn’t, far outweighs anything I ever got from alcohol.

i wish you all best - you CAN be free of it and life is much brighter without! Feel free to dm me if you have questions.

@Peaky777 I hear you peaky. My record is seven wines a day lately. Not glasses. BOTTLES. I'm dying of shame everytime the recycling van comes around. I'll give you a brief reason for my drinking which is heartbreak/deaths/bored/skint/used/abused and feel I have utterly no purpose left. I have to be honest the doctor gave antidepressants straight away...that I don't want to take as I think there is a difference between 'being depressed' and 'depression'.
If anyone would of been what I've been through they'd need a bloody stiff drink aswell! But I can't stop now (not for lack of trying) as having physical withdrawls. I know I've damaged myself. I so want to stop. I wish you the best of luck and hope you well xxx💐

People think you are a great person because you ARE a great person. Addicts (hope ur ok if I use that word) can be some of the most sensitive, emotional, considerate people. You do so much for people, to the extent of even wanting to protect them from knowing that you're struggling. I wish you all the best.

OP, I'm a doctor. Believe me when I say your GP will not judge you and will have seen many professionals in your situation; they will help all they can. I'm also a problem drinker (it's very common amongst doctors), and near-complete sobriety is the best thing I ever did. It's given me my life back. It's also opened my eyes to the extent of my husband's drinking, which I was previously in denial about. If he carries on as he is, he'll be dead in a few years, and I'm afraid you will be too. I mean it. Please go and see your GP ASAP, or contact your local alcohol support services. I highly recommend The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray as well x

Like you, I was incredibly embarrassed by my drinking, and the thought of admitting I was an alcoholic made me want to curl up with cringe. Unlike you, before I could admit to myself that I had a problem, others around me started noticing, and that was far more humiliating than going to the GP to ask for help would have been. Even with the knowledge in hindsight, I'm still not sure if I would have been able to convince my bottle-of-vodka-a-day-drinking self to self-refer for help, that's how ashamed I was. I get it.

However, the very first addiction group meeting I went to (not AA, but similar), I fully expected to be full of street drinkers; grubby old men and homeless people. It wasn't. I was 31, a professional, married mother of 2, and I was shocked by how many other women, just like me, were in the same boat. Our drinking, which had been a treat at the end of a long day, or a way to unwind after the kids had been driving you crazy, had taken over our lives, and was costing us more than money.

I've been sober for 12 years next month, and although it was tough to begin with, the very hardest bit was admitting that I had a problem, and you've already done that @Peaky777! Your GP likely sees a couple of women in a similar situation every week, and will be able to provide all the support you will need.

These days I'm happy to admit to people that I'm an alcoholic, because being a sober alcoholic is something to be proud of, which is incredible considering the shame and embarrassment it brought me when I was drinking.

@IAmAnAlcoholic I am so sorry the groups you have tried have been so poor.
On this thread there is lots of advice about face book groups, online groups, and podcasts that might be able to help you? Good luck

You have posted on here - a courageous step!

Reading what you have said above, the drinking doesn't seem to be working
(it seems that you don't do it and feel happy - you just feel numb...and then scared/guilty/embarrassed).

What could you do with the money and time you would get back from not spending on drink? Is there something you would really like to do (for yourself - or for someone else?) or something you would like to be?

I think that people who succeed with this usually have help. If your GP doesn't seem like an option - and you don't take to AA, there is always 'Drinkwise'. (The Samaritans suggest them.)

You say you are embarrassed of anyone finding out but OP people will find out if you continue. I have someone in the family who drinks similar to this and when visiting them I notice their demeanor change around 5pm - words begin to slur etc (after 1 glass, i presume it is because they are essentially just topping up so signs start quicker). At 7pm they are snoring on the couch. Everyone (including grandchildren) makes jokey comments about them/to them but it is actually serious. It gets pretty annoying quite quickly.

If you go to the GP you can stop people finding out. Nip it in the bud now. GP won't bat an eyelid. You've made the first steps by posting here. Best of luck OP.

I think you have two choices @Peaky777
You either go to your Gp for help and stop, or you slide deeper and deeper into alcoholism until you are drinking three bottles a night, then four. You’ll need more and more to reach the state of mind thot satisfies you. My DD’s friend’s dad was like you and now all their conversations are at the graveside.

Do you have any idea what GP’s get told on a daily basis? “I think I’m a transvestite. I’m making myself sick. I’m abusing my painkillers. I’ve taken cocaine. I’m having inappropriate thoughts. ̶I̶’̶v̶e̶ ̶g̶o̶t̶ ̶a̶ ̶c̶a̶r̶r̶o̶t̶ ̶s̶t̶u̶c̶k̶ ̶u̶p̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶a̶s̶s̶“ I promise you he will not bat an eyelid as you’ll be the third person that day to say it.

Make that appointment today.

If you are drinking that much and feel as you do about stopping, you are an alcoholic. The fact that you can stop for a few weeks doesn’t change that. You will need help and support. Not everyone gets on with AA. Google Alcohol/substance abuse services in your area.

I see others have mentioned it too, but if you're very overweight (which seems likely if you're drinking so many calories), an Ozempic/Mounjaro prescription, which can be sourced online, will probably cut out any desire for wine.

While I don't necessarily agree that you should be trying to go this alone without professional support, approaching it obliquely from a weight loss angle could really help.

Do something to stop yourself now before it's too late. My best friend died of liver disease over 20 years ago brought on by drinking too much over a long period. Leaving a 9 and a 7 year old DC. They were heartbroken. Your DC would be too if you don't stop. You say you feel pain in the liver area. Your GP can give you emetic drugs that will make you vomit if you drink alcohol. It will put you off drinking. Go to your GP. It will be in confidence. No one will know. Please do it before it's too late. My friend left it too late. It was hidden from friends. By the time they did go to a GP because of terrible pain. There was not much the GP could do.

I'm really scared about physical withdrawal. I've been drinking every nights for decades.
Edited to add that I also have a lot of unresolved trauma.

A dear friend of my parents was an alcoholic. He was a well respected professional and died of liver failure in his 50s. He was a lovely, intelligent and generous man, and they never stopped thinking well of him. Alcoholism can affect anyone. His alcoholism didn't make him a terrible, shameful, unworthy person. But it did kill him. You have to make a choice now, to live. Go and seek help, tell someone who can help you. It will be such a relief not to bear this burden alone.

Will come back and write more in the morning but I got a great deal worse than this and quit completely without AA and haven't had or wanted a drink for three months now. Try not to judge yourself and also realise you're already doing really well being so honest with yourself and reaching out for help, with motivation to change.

@IAmAnAlcoholic I am really sorry to hear that. I know you have been to the GP and you did not find the service you were referred to at all helpful.
This page provides details of telephone helplines who might be able to help you get the support you need.

https://www.drinkaware.co.uk/advice-and-support/alcohol-support-services/support-lines/

Don't be embarrassed. Your drinking isn't going to stop you being a great person and your GP won't judge you or be able to say anything. Get help. You sound depressed - depression always made me irrationally fear judgement. If you go I'll bet you'll think 'Oh. What was I worried about?' afterwards.

In terms of stopping the drink, work on your mindset? I don't feel I need alcohol anymore - I enjoy a literal drink just as much. Try decaf coffee; they're a warm treat and just as satisfying in the evening.

Best wishes x

It's not a lie, you care enough to do a great job. You care enough to post here. You can do this. Don't buy the wine again. Go tee total. Distract with something else. A fancy mocktail or juice. Reading. A hobby. Exercise. Anything ... you can do this.

@IAmAnAlcoholic sending hugs🤗thing is I know WHY I drink. I associate drink with happiness/socialising/relaxing. I swear I'm such a positive person but had a shit storm the last few years that is the gift that keeps on giving and I've been kicked so much when down I don't think I'll ever get back up! I used to enjoy a nice Bath but it's just a chore now. I used to have hobbies.....can't afford them. Nice walk out and about. It's pissing down/miserable and have nowhere to walk to! Work....I hate my job. Quit? Yeah I'm already skint and a full time carer so let's quit my shite job that's the only reason I get out of bed right now. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. The antidepressants the doctor has put me on have EXACTLY the same side effects as the withdrawal symptoms coming off alcohol...so how do I know if its the tablets or not? I phoned 3 separate alcohol support centres and 2 out of 3 told me not to cut down?????? Ill be dead by 40 drinking 7 bottles of wine a day? Another said to cut down one glass a week????? So at that rate I'll still be pissed this time next year???

Sorry about what I can only describe as a non-intelligible drunken rant. I'm at wits end. Can only be sympathetic to others on this thread and say we'll done to those who have over come thier issues! I salute you!

Well done for recognising you need to cut back. Following as I need to do the same and thank you as your post and other responses have given me a boost to have some dry days.

Curious, having not been to my GP. For those whose have found it helpful, what in the way of support have they offered?