The continuing support thread for living alcohol-free. Everyone welcome.

[Blackberryblossom]

Hello and welcome to the alcohol free support thread. Many thanks to @wendywagon for holding the reins on the last thread, and to drybird for starting the original thread about 3 years ago.
We’re a broad community who have all chosen to live alcohol free for good. There’s support here whatever your stage on that journey. Whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love all the successes of whatever shape and size, and have all been there too when things get challenging.
Thank you too @rep22 @onewildandpreciouslife for offering to back up host too. I thought there was someone else but I can’t find the post.

well done @WendyWagon that will be the book moving!

@Fortheloveofgodwhy all 1000 of them!

Yayyy! @WendyWagon that's fabulous! Congratulations!! Onwards to the day when you can burn your Spanx in triumph and dance the hellacious hula on the ashes 💃

Congratulations on the 7 days @Thestartofsomethinggood that's a hard milestone to win.

Thank you for the Obstacle Course/Bunnies repost @Onewildandpreciouslife - that one has been very helpful to me - particularly after my last blip. Over 3 months now since last sip. Despite severe provocation from the dog. 🙄

Strength and love to all. x

Hello all, just checking in! I’ve been trying to really reduce my social media time but I do miss this wonderful thread and last night I dreamt of it😂 I dreamt I drank a whole bottle of champagne and felt so terrible and ashamed and then I thought “it’s because I’ve neglected the thread and now I need to go there and confess”😂😭

anyway, I’m still so happy with my sobriety. 3 years and counting. Thanks to you guys! Hope you’re all well! @WendyWagon ❤️❤️❤️

@BunniesBunniesBunnies ah now bunnies that was my tipple. If I had any cash post the house it would be dangerous

Hello @BunniesBunniesBunnies ! Good to see you again, even if it is because of a nightmare I hope life is treating you well.

Congratulations on the stone off @WendyWagon ! You really won't be needing that surgery. That's a lot of books moved! I'm currently working out whether to spend an Amazon voucher on the hardback or kindle version of a book I've been fancying. I suspect common sense will triumph and I'll get the kindle. Once I have a bit of space on my bookshelves I might add in the hard copy if it's that good.

I was looking through some old screenshots and found this poem I’d saved. It probably spoke to me as I came out of my “cancer phase”, but it struck me today as very true for this thread: “A risen woman does not find enough risen sisters to join her.”

Morning all.
A non dog accompanied sleep was had.
More shenigans last night as I bought a taller larder off FB (huge bargain) The DH collected it, moaned a bit but it means he can see his swag. He doesn't cook but does the shopping and laundry. My wine rack is looking lonely in the garden so I shall stick that on fleebay. And when I have my new kitchen I don't want a wine fridge! (the designers go glassy eyed when they suggest them, hum).
BFF is coming to help with curtains today so we will scoff a curry.
Have a good day all.

That’s a poem to live by @Onewildandpreciouslife , thank you for posting it.
hope your curtains and curry are going well @WendyWagon

How is everyone doing on this Friday evening? I have a big AF milestone tomorrow, and have celebrated by booking something miles outside my comfort zone next week (a half day songwriting workshop….) It feels very real without a gin to take the edge off, but I’d never have had the confidence to even consider it while I was drinking. And really, it’s just playing guitar in someone else’s living room so shouldn’t really be that big a deal….

@Blackberryblossom i have two novels on my pc. I do wonder if boozers are artistic people who lack the confidence to publish, perform etc. I played the cello at school, later a singer. Tbh all I wanted was to play the piano. My granny was a concert pianist (society beauty, not famous except for her divorce!). She wouldn't teach me. Untalented apparently. My DD is a pianist, my niece an opera singer. So I don't think we are not up to the mark! I have a voice like Alison Moyat / Nina Sinmone. I have threatened my DC I will go on The Voice, they are horrified. I might sing at my 40th wedding anniversary. I did at my 25th and many, many weddings. I lost my way with alcoholism. Very difficult to sing hungover. There are two careers I wish I had, singer and writer. I still fancy the book, ' mummy's pissed after school, fell down, got up and learned to like herself'
Who knows? Enjoy your course. Sobriety creates space for the real us. Let them in x

@WendyWagon that brought a lump to my throat. Thank you.
Your voice sounds beautiful, what a great mix! And wow on the novels too. Between your voice and your words you obviously have stories to tell. Untalented my a*rse.

Morning all.
Was a bit grumpy last night as I had to work a bit later than planned so missed my gym class, and got hit with a grotty cold. Everything got out of proportion, so I ate two ice creams.Ah well. Think I’m going to go for my planned long run notwithstanding my cold and the rain.

Hope everyone else has a good hangover free Saturday morning

Morning all. I hope your run helps @Onewildandpreciouslife , it's wet here but the air is fresh and cool. There are far more disproportionate responses than two ice creams, after all.

I'm just going to put this in here, with pride and slight disbelief on my part. 😀

🤩@Blackberryblossom ! That is an incredible achievement! You should be so proud of yourself!

May I join the thread? I’ve just told my best friend that I know I have a problem.
which app is that, please?

Welcome @SoosanCarter . Well done for telling your friend- a great first step. It’s the TryDry app.

Thanks. She’s being so kind and is so pleased I’ve said it.

Our friends can often see that we have a problem, but don’t want to say anything or maybe don’t know what to say.

Do you have a plan as to how you’re going to stop drinking? It’s very helpful to do a lot of reading about alcohol - “quit lit”. I found Annie Grace’s Alcohol Experiment book a good place to start,as it takes you the first 30 days.

@Blackberryblossom WOW!!! Amazing - well done.

Welcome @SoosanCarter I read all the quitlit when I first stopped drinking. It really helped - William Porter Alcohol Explained was most useful to me.

I also had a lot of Very Early Nights which also helped.

I’ve signed up to the Try Dry app. I’ve started reading The Naked Mind. I’ve ordered Adrian Chiles’s book because he sounded so logical when I’ve heard him interviewed about it.
I struggle to cook without a glass of wine in hand, so I’m going to get a stash of ready meals.
I’ll get knitting again to keep my hands busy.

@Blackberryblossom Huge congratulations and thank you for all the support so far

@SoosanCarter sounds like a plan!

I’ve heard a few interviews with Adrian Chiles, and he makes some really interesting points. However, his stated aim is to reduce his drinking, not stop completely. “Moderating” may work for him, but those of us on this thread find it exhausting and pointless. It’s completely up to you which approach you try, although we do ask that if you post on this thread your aim is to be completely alcohol free. That doesn’t mean none of us ever slip up! One day at a time is the best way to take this journey

Good point. My friend came round this morning with biscuits, and we agreed that completely alcohol free will work best for me. I told her that I only buy one bottle of wine at a time, otherwise I would just start a second, she didn’t know that.

Woo hoo @Blackberryblossom congratulations on your 1000 days. Well done you.

@Onewildandpreciouslife I was going to say the same. I've not read the Adrian Chiles book but I was pretty sure he advocates moderation (not abstinence) and yes this thread is for those of us who have chosen an AF path.

Thank you for all the congratulations! If I think of it as 1000 day 1s back to back it somehow looks a lot more like something I’d achieve Going out for dinner with the Mister tonight, it’s a nice place so looking forward to seeing what AF options they have.

Welcome @SoosanCarter , lovely to have you here. Sounds like you have a great friend supporting you. Good plan on the ready meals. We ended up having a floor relaid soon after I went af and that really helped because the furniture went back in different places so wherever I sat had no prior association with where I’d reach for my drink. Whereas now I always know where my is. Get creative about breaking old drinking habits. You can’t go wrong with quit lit, scribd has loads on audio and/or ebook and has a month’s free trial. I liked Lotta Dann. Cravings will pass. If you were a wine drinker, think about getting some pickled onions in, or just brush your teeth. It’s hard to fancy a wine after either of those. Gin was my first love so I had some Gordon’s AF and some really fancy ice cubes. Books, bubble bath and a nice new yarn to knit with (you’ll save a ton of money…) My knitting is so much better since I stopped drinking (far fewer mistakes )