The freedom thread ( continued ) Riding the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life!

[Fortheloveofgodwhy]

Hello all

This is a thread for people who have decided that life is much better without alcohol!🤩 These threads were started by @Drybird, and they have changed the lives of many people.

Some posters on these threads have been sober for a long time, and some are only just starting. We are a very friendly and inclusive bunch and we are always excited when someone new joins the thread. The only thing we ask is that our posters have given up alcohol completely. Talk of moderation can be triggering for some people, so this thread is not the right place for that (there are other moderation threads🙂).

We are a supportive welcoming bunch. No question is ever to “ silly “ and their is generally someone around if you are struggling

So just come here to chat or vent or check in . Whatever you need as you ride the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life smile

T@Champoopapihank you to for hosting the last thread 💜

And here’s to the next 40 pages grin

Glad you’re ok @SavBbunny

some work environments are just so toxic. Well done for escaping yours @HangingOver

I used to run a business and work in a hot kitchen with my dh……………..

Power to you both @HangingOver and @SavBbunny!

Hi all

Well done @SavBbunny for resisting under pressure. Congrats @HangingOver getting out of a job you no longer enjoy is life changing.

I haven't posted for a few days, but I think now on day 45 AF. Now at a point where I think I may have reset my relationship with the booze (won't go into any more detail that that as don't want to trigger anyone). BUT conversely I think I may prefer to continue be AF entirely as feels safer and tbh not totally sure I am not fooling myself.

So, I will be doing some thinking over next few days, but if I choose the non totally AF route I obviously won't be posting here. But will lurk and cheer you all on.

Sorry, hope was OK to post the above.

Morning all
@Lydialurk glad you are feeling positive and continuing to consider and evaluate your AF journey. Only you will know how best to go forward but this thread will be here and others may be happy to share their thoughts and stories when they reached this point.

have a good weekend 👍

Morning all. Feeling better today.
Rebellion yesterday, went out on business (skiving). Had big order from famous shopping channel. Would have gone on the pop, didn't, driving. Hoorah.

Hi everyone, hope your respective weekends have started well so far.

@SavBbunny Still a bit early for me (I've not had a coffee yet and it's also the first day of the school holidays in Yorkshire) pbut I'm reading your post that you a big order come in work wise, that sounds great work! Deserved after the week you had. I popped into M&S on Thursday and the AF drink selection was pretty plentiful so may venture back today to look more in detail on what they have (and get Percy pigs for me the children).

I think some of the health benefits are starting to come through, pretty solid sleep and some of the clothes are feeling less snug. I expect some of this is just my mind thinking that way but I'm happy to take it 😊

Hi All, can I join? I’ve continued to mess my life up with booze. On the outside I look pretty ok, good job and all the traps that go with that. Single and live alone so that means I can drink myself into stupors with no one judging me. I make a tit out of myself at every event. I’m lonely, bored, skint (pissed it all away). Not drank for 4 days but I’m always fine in the early stages. Away with work next week and that’s all boozy dinners. Terrified I’ve fucked up my body as get aches and pains often. Any advice/tips/support/sober mates would be greatly appreciated xx

Hi @whatthefuck23 . I'm relatively newish to this (coming up 3 weeks) but I was pretty similar. Not single but certainly the outside looking in probably looked very rosy with a decent job etc but inside I was not rosy at all. Have you got a plan for the dinners that are coming up?

Glad you’re feeling better @SavBbunny and that you’re starting to feel the benefit @Crayonpenny

welcome @whatthefuck23 . Work dinners are tough, particularly in the early days! I use two strategies: playing it forward and having something to look forward to. I think one of the hardest parts is saying no to the first drink, because you think it’ll help you to relax. Spend some time in advance playing forward the tape of what happens after that first drink (in my case it often wasn’t pretty). And on the night, have a clear thought of a good way to end the evening- I always used to imagine myself sat in bed with a herbal tea - and then work towards that. You may find you want to leave the dinner quite promptly, and that’s absolutely fine. I now find work dinners much less stressful as I don’t have to worry about how much I’ll drink and whether I’ll embarrass myself

Glad you are feeling better @SavBbunny
@Crayonpenny That’s great you are starting to feel the benefits relatively early on! I’m still continuing to notice progressive improvements. It’s all very gradual. I’ll feel same old, same old and then maybe look at a photo from last year and think “thank god I don’t look like that now!”

Not getting up to pee in the middle of the night is a massive improvement that has a knock on effect to everything!

@whatthefuck23 Welcome🙂
Alcohol causes inflammation. I knew that and still kept drinking. I had lots of aches and pains. I’ve stopped for about 3 months. Longest spell ever. My aches and pains among other things have improved massively! It doesn’t happen overnight but I noticed improvements in a relatively short space of time. Also, mood wise I was motivated to do my stretches and exercises, so that helps keep me less achy too. Well done for taking the first steps to stopping. It’s totally worth it xx

@Crayonpenny @JesusSufferingFuck22 @Onewildandpreciouslife thanks so much for your kind words. It’s the work nights and dating that I think will be most affected (not that I date much but they always end up boozy). For the dinners next week I’m going to say I’m just having a detox (after several holidays and boozy weekends). But like the idea of the self talk of what will happen if I have that one drink……

I am known as the work hard play hard type and have built up this reputation for being a boozer (it’s cringe now at late 30s). But what people don’t know is the massive amount of drinking alone at home, through shame, boredom, stress, sadness even celebration. Let’s be honest I don’t need a reason. I’m seeing a therapist for trauma so I’m hoping this may help as well.

Well done to all of you on your sobriety, you’re all an inspiration. I hope soon I will be 1/2/3 months xx

@JesusSufferingFuck22 To be honest I did have a fair amount to slim down on! It's interesting you mention pictures as it reminds me of my children, namely day by day you don't notice much change and then you look at photos it's a bit surreal to look back and see the change in a few months. I took a screen shot of myself during a zoom call before Christmas and it was ghastly. I looked like some kind of being from a Christmas Carol, pale and tired etc. I'm going to find it at some point and compare I think!

@whatthefuck23 , you've got some great people on here who I've really benefited getting support from. The posts back from @JesusSufferingFuck22 and @Onewildandpreciouslife are great examples 😀

@HangingOver have you seen the resuscitated thread about the boozy big stories? Very much for those with a huge sense of black humour, very St Marion. Might not be for the newbies as it is a bit 'so what' but I laughed out loud.

If you can be arsed to read 22 pages I tell the spanx story!
Just be out for driving pratice with the DD😬

@SavBbunny would you mind pointing me in the direction of said thread(s)?

Sorry, signed off too early. @SavBbunny how did driving practice go? My 6 year old just got in a mood about our earlier b and m trip, fab. Namely it was 'boring' which was probably fair.

Hello everyone! Sorry to hear you have been having a hard time @SavBbunny and happy you got through it! Skiving it definitely sometimes the answer. And yes I too want to read that thread!

Welcome @whatthefuck23 you're in the right place. I think that if you're worried about what people think on the work trip it's perfectly legit to say you're on antibiotics or something.

I second the advice about playing the tape forward. And picturing the end of the night. And doing both beforehand so you're prepared! The book Alcohol Explained has really helped me. I'm only 3 weeks sober but that book really helped.

I'm happy to report I made it past my 3 week milestone. Although I have still been drinking way too much AF beer! Been cooking and eating really healthily though which is great!

Been feeling a bit low today because of some stress at work on Friday, but trying to ignore it and feel proud!

Morning all.
@Crayonpenny @Stupidlydupidly The thread I mentioned is called 'disgraced myself on a works night out'
I have decided not to go to the scene of the crime tonight (I disgraced myself at this awards do last year, spanx flashing drunk). Too risky with having had an emotional week. Friday was better and I managed not to go on a booze run.
I would have loved to see my lovely ex staff again but I would have to be polite to the sexist pig who ousted me from the job I loved. The only way I could face him is with alcohol. Six months on I am well enough to not put myself through that.

Lots of lemons in for the faux gin and I cleaned my fridge out!
Have a peaceful day my friends.

That was a wise decision SavB, going to that event could have triggered you.

I have made a decision of my own. I am going to continue be totally AF free for a while longer. All that stuff about having reset my relationship with the booze is rubbish. I haven't and I will end up back to where I started.

So, back on the wagon. Day 46. For some reason this song from my childhood keeps going through my head. It is somewhat dated (and not very woke at all!) but replace Cherokees with Wine Witches and it fits how I feel...

Sorry, meant to say welcome to @whatthefuck23 fuck23. This is a great group. I am still meandering my way through my booze free journey and have got lost a couple of times, but I would not have achieved what I have without this thread.

I told a lie. I am on day 45 again!

Hi Everyone!

@SavBbunny Thank you for pointing to that thread, I will have a look shortly. I echo what @LydiaLurk has said, you had a rough week last week so not going to the event sounds very sensible!

@LydiaLurk I hope the last couple of days have been ok for you when you've been having a think about things. I just watched some of the you tube video! It certainly makes a nice change from Spice Girls! (No disrespect to Spice Girls, my kids have mastered (well attempted) 'stop right now' dance moves so poor Alexa has been quite busy).

@LydiaLurk Haha name change!

Lydia is also on day 45 😁

I hope you are both very proud of yourselves 👍👍