Dryer than a Tena Lady - DJ2022 #2

[MyGhastIsFlabbered]

New thread for those of us attempting Dry January.

My Mum died suddenly last year, so know where you're coming from. Hadn't heard of that type of arthritis until coming across it on MN, sounds doubly tough

But we shall reach our goal of moderation! Or total AF for some impressive types on the thread

Honestly guys, I cannot believe we are on day 17! Well done y'all. I got great work news last week about some hard work coming to fruition and didn't drink, my birthday tomorrow and I am really sure I won't drink.
I also had a stressful weekend with family (helping mother move from our family home and make decisions about belongings!). Arrived home having spent the 2 hour drive thinking, 'one glass of wine wouldn't hurt'. Still didn't drink.
Hope everyone is okay! I am not sure how I'll cope if I crack and drink... Hopefully I won't just abandon the whole thing!

Definitely stuffing my face with chocolate tonight!

Hello all, nearly the end of day 17. This must be the longest I’ve gone without a drink in 35 years -scary thought.

I feel great in the mornings but feel so tired by the end of the day. I’m feeling very glum this evening but I think it’s because I’m so tired and have to go out for an hour when I just want to stay warm watching TV and have an early night. Sleeping well (until my puppy needs to go out at 6.30am) so not sure where this tiredness is coming from

I've stripped and washed the sofa covers and remade it, and done four other loads of washing today, just got to put the bloody stuff away now! I tend to go into power save mode in the evenings though...

Think I may join Crumpets with a wee bit more chocolate, when I can be arsed to move

The 17th day is nearly over ✅
Feeling tired today , I think We might have walked a bit too far ( 10 k yesterday and nearly 5k today and I’m errrrr … a more mature member of the congregation )

Don’t miss wine at the moment , though we’re planning a night away and dinner out at the end of January so I’m a bit confused about what to do then ( haven’t booked anything yet , so no point fretting )

@DeedIDo hopefully today is a better day 💐

Hi all, I've been lurking on this thread and the previous one getting a lot of motivation from al your posts!
I'm on say 17 (other than a small glass of Buck's Fizz on the 2nd over lunch which I'm not counting as it was so small!) feeling really good and actually very proud about getting through 3 weekends now without my usual evening G&Ts and bottles of wine!
My drinking has spiralled since the start of lockdown 2020 and I realised over Christmas just how much more I was needing to get down my neck before I felt tipsy. On the 28th DHs family came over and I kept looking at everyone's glasses thinking 'why are they taking so long to drink!?' I ended up getting pissed and saying some stupid things to SIL and FIL and I realised at this point I needed to sort my problem out!
And here we are... well done to everyone!

Ps is anyone noticing an inner calmness and better relationship with their spouse? I feel my usual irritability has vanished!

Thank you @MyGhastIsFlabbered and @NorthernChinchilla

Well Saturday night proved to be just a small glitch and the last two evenings have been AF and absolutely fine. Am getting so much more done of an evening, Not losing much weight yet but am going to exercise this morning before wonk.

Well done all you people who are having a difficult time an$ resisting temptation. Well done :)

I'm definitely trying to get back into the habit of getting my steps in, but with DD at home all day it's pretty hard, and wfh. I only count steps outside the house, so try for 6000, ie an hour's walking.

Am also going to try to get back into doing my morning workout Pirates, it's only 10 mins or so, but my back was squeaking today so must do it!

Anyone else eating more generally, especially sweet stuff? Not happy about this, putting weight on! However, will carry on with dry Jan.

@Shortkiwi I was. I think it's because our bodies are missing the sugar in alcohol - there's a high sugar content in alcoholic drinks sadly.

Day 17 and my skin and hair look soooo much better. It’s amazing! It’s really making me think I’m going to continue reducing my alcohol intake overall after dry jan & when I do drink stick to spirits rather than wine. I can’t seem to leave a bottle of wine when it’s opened.

@NorthernChinchilla

My Mum died suddenly last year, so know where you're coming from. Hadn't heard of that type of arthritis until coming across it on MN, sounds doubly tough

But we shall reach our goal of moderation! Or total AF for some impressive types on the thread

I'm so sorry to hear this. It's utterly destroying to lose your mum (I lost my wonderful mum very suddenly and unexpectedly in September 2020). It really does shift your whole universe.

I hope you are doing as okay?

Still here. Still dry though I have to say I know what @JaquiRussell means about caving to AF drinks. I had quite a few AF beers last week and weekend - 1 a day in the week and 3 Saturday. My son was really off with me saying it's disgusting that I need beer. It really upset me as for me it's just a sense of some sort of treat. I'm not having any Monday to Thursday this week though
All the carbs though.

Just a quick point on the sugar cravings. I was watching one of the live videos that Sober Dave puts out on Insta. He had a guy on who has written books, researched and studied. He claims the sugar desire is not a replacement from the sugar in alcohol but actually its your will power which is making you refrain from drinking, that's craving the sugar as its energy reward for willing you on. And in no way should the amount of sugar you crave or not at all, cause you to worry about the strength of your will power or whether your doing this on a different cause for determination. Each and every mind is different.
I thought it was a pretty interesting perspective/ researched opinion that I thought I would share 😊

Just checking in for day 17, whirlwind of an evening, spent in A&E with ds and a small fracture, nothing too dramatic though, all good here though.

@hellokitty9

Hi all, I've been lurking on this thread and the previous one getting a lot of motivation from al your posts! I'm on say 17 (other than a small glass of Buck's Fizz on the 2nd over lunch which I'm not counting as it was so small!) feeling really good and actually very proud about getting through 3 weekends now without my usual evening G&Ts and bottles of wine! My drinking has spiralled since the start of lockdown 2020 and I realised over Christmas just how much more I was needing to get down my neck before I felt tipsy. On the 28th DHs family came over and I kept looking at everyone's glasses thinking 'why are they taking so long to drink!?' I ended up getting pissed and saying some stupid things to SIL and FIL and I realised at this point I needed to sort my problem out! And here we are... well done to everyone!

Ps is anyone noticing an inner calmness and better relationship with their spouse? I feel my usual irritability has vanished!

I can completely relate to so much of this!

Day 15 ✅

Checking in. Day 16 here and still dry. We got this!

Day 17 here also. Glad I’m more than half way in first milestone! Next is not to drink during the week! Anyway day by day!

Happy birthday @ChangeMustCome I hope you have a lovely day! Any nice plans? I hope you have some nice things for yourself to look forward to - even if they are small little treats! It is mine tomorrow

Day 18 and it feels like a miracle to be honest. But was in bed by 10 and had a nice long sleep and feel good for it. Alcohol clearly has had a real hold on me since the pandemic started. My family would have been shocked by my drinking if they had known. It was basically an everyday thing and started getting earlier and earlier in the day. It's the first thing I crave in a time of stress/feeling low. I find it useful to recognise and reflect on this as I continue on this journey. I read an article in the paper this morn saying it will take society 5 years to get back to pre-pandemic levels of drinking as it has spiked so much!

Thought couple of days but have managed to push past it and determined to change this relationship. Everyone's comments helping, I enjoy reading this thread everyday. Thank you everyone and keep up the amazing work.

@hellokitty9 I can totally relate to the looking at everyone else's glasses!! Another reflection I've had in the past few days is how much I used to unconsciously find myself 'planning' my next drink e.g. what drink, when, how much. I did this a lot yesterday but it was on a theoretical level e.g. 'IF I had one, what would it be' and also I keep playing situations in my head like, IF a certain situation occurs, would I justify a drink? This is the heart of the dependency isn't it! Constant justification. I had to remind myself it was only Monday and how ridiculous my thoughts were! Plus I've come so far. It was stress/feeling low that really led to these thoughts. Things with OH not helping.

Still got a way to go to kick this. I keep telling myself if I don't kick this now, when will I?! It only gets worse. Plus the benefits of not drinking are massive, life changing. And I'm excited for that.

I am definitely feeling benefits and actually in general am okay most the day. Skin seems better again and sleep is good!

@Crunchymum doing OK ish. She was very disabled- you name a condition, she had it- but lived independently with carers from her 50s. We were INCREDIBLY close, only child, single parent (though I have a good relationship with my Dad), spoke daily, Skype at weekends, loved being a Granny.
Then at the start of lockdown she had a fall and literally went mad overnight. So I was taking multiple calls from hospital a day, and she was calling 10s of times a day either screaming and swearing, or terrified as she was in psychosis and thinking she was eg. locked in a cellar, or berating me and threatening to kill herself. It was dreadful, and a massive contribution to my breakdown. Not least as I couldn't even see her, let alone do anything to help.

Her death was sudden- embolism- but the hospital somehow kept her going so I could race to the other end of the country to say goodbye. Then doing all the legal stuff for months on end was a full time job in itself, esp in the pandemic. She died three days before the rules on visiting care homes changed and I spent last Mothering Sunday at the funeral parlour arranging her burial.

Sorry, that was long!

Day to day I'm fine, but on a deeper level I think there's a lot to work through.
If you don't mind me asking, what happened with your Mum?

And I'm with pp, I don't think we should be in ANY way guilty about drinking AF beers, it's just the grown up version of Ribena! Sorry your son upset you Whoops

Thanks, @JaquiRussell. Interesting about sugar cravings. I’ll try not to beat myself up about this! Being AF is more important!

Oh @Crunchymum that sounds heartbreaking

@NorthernChinchilla

My gosh, it all sounds awful. So much to deal with before you lost your mum, as well as the sheer grief of her actual death. I hope you have good support (partner, friends) and I'm glad you have your dad. Losing your mum is something I don't think you ever get over.

My mum always had poor mental health. Panic, anxiety, agoraphobia, fear of anything medical. She wasn't well in that respect, and Covid / lockdown have her a valid excuse to not see us (4 kids, 12 grandkids) but physically she plodded along. The day she died we thought she was having a massive panic attack. In fact the first ambulance that came agreed (her oxygen and BP was fine, HR was high but fitted in with her having a panic attack). The paramedics would have taken her in if she'd insisted but of course she didn't want to go.

Half an hour after they left she collapsed and died. My dad and sister performed CPR on her until the other crews arrived and they worked on her for an hour but she was gone. So I went from thinking she'd had a panic attack to getting the "come now" call but she was dead when I got there.

It's a lot. It was over a year ago now and day to day I'm alright. But things like this change you and redefine you.

I've been wallowing. I've been grieving and wine had become a part of that. So I want to change things.

Sorry for the depressing post. But it's how things are.

I'm off work today and it's my youngests birthday (she is at school) so I'm going to take my sorry arse for a nice canal walk and a hot chocolate.