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Alcohol support

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Original poster

Drinking WAY too much and need to detox - any shared experiences?

351 replies

TimeToStop · 31/01/2021 05:40

I'm a daily drinker and have been for absolutely years. Since the start of lockdown 1 I've gone from drinking around half a bottle of wine or a couple of beers a day to now drinking 1/4 bottle of spirits, a bottle of wine and maybe also a few beers. Because I drink all the time, I don't get drunk any more, it's a steady drip feed of alcohol through the day. My sleep is appalling; up around 4/5 am after 3 hours sleep and then I need to have my first drink to steady the withdrawal.

I'm supposed to be working from home but I'm really beginning to fail in that and I am desperate to stop. I stopped in February 2019 for 3 months - it was sort of enforced as I was very unwell and in hospital for 3 weeks with an ovarian abscess. I felt so much better. Since then it crept up from a beer at the end of the day to where I am now.

I've spoken to my GP and been put in contact with my local drug and alcohol service as I'm drinking too much to safely stop on my own now. I'm scheduled to do a community detox on February 8th and I wondered if anybody here has done this and what it's like? I'm so nervous about it.

OP posts:
Thomasina2021 · 13/02/2021 08:47

Ah your poor thing - well done for tackling this ..

You can join thousands of AA meetings on Zoom - just search online meetings on their website xxx you can do this but think you need the support of AA

VoldemortsKitten · 13/02/2021 09:04

@TimeToStop Just brilliant. You've made it through the really awful bit and that's no mean feat. I hope your anxiety is a little better and the shakes too. Yes there will be cravings, do whatever you can until they pass. Going to bed early is a great plan. Sweet treats like a few Maltesers buttons are fab too Smile your brain and body are healing and recalibrating. Whatever you are feeling, drinking won't help. It just won't, it's not worth it, but it can become such an entrenched response to stress/ boredom/ anything that it's hard to avoid the thoughts. You're nearly a week in that is just fabulous. X

Original poster
TimeToStop · 13/02/2021 09:48

Sleeping all night is just such a treat! Today I've woken up feeling the best I've felt so far. Actually enjoying a morning coffee instead of sipping it and feeling like I'm going to throw up every few seconds. Not taking a moment of it for granted. Day 6. So many things to re-learn how to do, like work, deal with teenage daughter, etc. I cooked dinner last night without wine, which was really quite difficult as it was always a favourite drinking moment for me, but I did it with a glass of posh orange juice. Trying to remember all the various bits of advice I've been given by so many generous people during this week. I NEVER want to go back to how I was this time last week. xxx

OP posts:
ApolloandDaphne · 13/02/2021 10:00

You are doing so well. I did dry January and felt fab. The minute February started I began drinking again and now I feel terrible. I have spent the morning talking to myself and asking myself many questions. I think I really just need to continue being dry forever. This thread is really helping me to face up to my issues around alcohol so I am very glad to posted. In supporting you I hope I can help myself too.

JCBluebell · 13/02/2021 10:01

You have just the right attitude, OP. You're so appreciative of all the small things. Enjoying morning coffee rather than feeling sick trying to swallow it is soooo good! I remember that well! And breaking the habit of wine while making dinner is such a positive step. Well done! The posh orange sounds yum. I'm so glad you feel you never want to go back. You have such resolve. It will become second nature.

JCBluebell · 13/02/2021 10:07

@ApolloandDaphne - I think that's so true that supporting others can be such a help to yourself too. Helps you stay on the right path. I really recommend this staying dry thing.

Thomasina2021 · 13/02/2021 10:35

@TimeToStop

Sleeping all night is just such a treat! Today I've woken up feeling the best I've felt so far. Actually enjoying a morning coffee instead of sipping it and feeling like I'm going to throw up every few seconds. Not taking a moment of it for granted. Day 6. So many things to re-learn how to do, like work, deal with teenage daughter, etc. I cooked dinner last night without wine, which was really quite difficult as it was always a favourite drinking moment for me, but I did it with a glass of posh orange juice. Trying to remember all the various bits of advice I've been given by so many generous people during this week. I NEVER want to go back to how I was this time last week. xxx
Well done !!! It’s learning new habits isn’t it? I absolutely have to mainline lime and soda when I’m cooking in the evening etc as if I get the slightest bit thirsty I start thinking about alcohol !
BillieSpain · 13/02/2021 12:05

Oh you are doing brilliantly! Very well done.

I did a year off booze 4 years ago, after 2 or 3 months it honestly was easy, I didn't count days, nothing. Got so happy and content. I remember making a chicken stew with 3/4 a bottle of white wine in it and the smell of the wine made me feel ill. I threw the rest I didn't need away, didn't think twice.

Which brings me onto... why did I have that first beer in the sun?

I'm looking 3/4 years younger already! It's all the water, I am swigging water when it would have been a G&T!!!

Keep going @TimeToStop you are no nonsense brilliant!

Original poster
TimeToStop · 13/02/2021 12:57

I'm still on my last meds today and tomorrow but very small doses now. Then I have a key worker, who is very experienced, and a huge booklet that I have to work through with him. But I'm also keeping a diary, writing down all the very worst things that happened and that it felt like at 4am, the utter bewilderment and despair and physical illness. You don't know it unless you've felt it, it is just horrific. I don't like thinking about it but at the same time I don't want to forget it because it will keep me going. Mint humbugs. They are helping big time and they last a long time.

OP posts:
Hohofortherobbers · 13/02/2021 14:25

Have delurked to congratulate you on your first week dry. You have been amazingly strong, you and your family must be very proud of your achievement. I hope you feel better with every hour that passes. Take support everywhere you can find it, attend meetings, read quit literature and surround yourself with like minded people, either irl or online. You will be an inspiration to the next desperate soul who writes a thread here. Well done!

Original poster
TimeToStop · 13/02/2021 15:43

I was just thinking it's gone 3pm on a SATURDAY and I'm sober. Woah ...

OP posts:
KittytheHare · 13/02/2021 18:55

Such a lovely feeling Op! You're doing so well, an unbelievable step forward in just a week.

JCBluebell · 13/02/2021 20:48

Well done with sober Saturday! You're building a new way of life. It's great you have a good key worker and they are helping you work through stuff and not just leaving you in the lurch after the meds. Yes, it can be very painful thinking about how things have been. Don't torture yourself with it, but you're right it can be very helpful to remind yourself why you do not want to go back there. They say pain has no memory, which is why people make the same mistakes again, so it's important not to forget what you've been through. That's not for you any more. You deserve much better!

LouisaAWOL · 14/02/2021 19:37

@JCBluebell

The OP didn't go cold turkey. She's been doing a supervised detox. She's doing great. Sounds like you've also had a rough time LouisaAWOL. Great that you don't feel like drinking now.
I realized that once i had pressed enter Im new to MN so getting used to thread.. Im much much better JCbluebell, my liver test was bordering on dangerous Wishing all the best..
Original poster
TimeToStop · 14/02/2021 22:26

One whole week sober! I can't say that today was easy because it was actually really bloody hard. First day with very very limited detox meds. But I did it. I think I will be keeping the mint humbug companies in business for a very long time ...

OP posts:
imonyourway · 14/02/2021 22:29

Well done you Smile that's a whole week done, you've done so well.

dublingirl66 · 14/02/2021 22:29

You can do this

Already amazing work

Each week gets easier xxxxxxxxx

BillieSpain · 14/02/2021 22:45

Go you!

Bojingle · 14/02/2021 22:53

Just found this thread and wanted to wish you well OP. One week down is fantastic, congratulations. You can do this!

MonkeyPuddle · 14/02/2021 23:05

Well done lovely. You should be so proud of yourself.

McHoops · 15/02/2021 00:09

You are incredible OP. You have inspired a few others of us along the way. All that you have described and encountered sounds familiar .
It's wonderful how ALL the contributors to this thread are supportive, non-judgmental and kind ; because alcoholics cannot be kind to themselves. The self-loathing and the feeling that they (we) deserve all the bad stuff that comes with the addiction has been dispelled by all these uplifting messages! Thank you for sharing. We are treading this uncertain, scary path with you.

JCBluebell · 15/02/2021 00:11

A whole week! Brilliant achievement OP! It will get so much easier. Just you keep doing what you're doing. X

McHoops · 15/02/2021 00:14

correction : non- judgemental!

OakSnows · 15/02/2021 00:15

Amazingly well done!

JCBluebell · 15/02/2021 00:25

Totally agree with McHoops. It's been amazing to see what's happened on this thread, with the brave OP herself of course, but also with others who have shown genuine concern and support and some of you who have decided to quit drinking alongside TimeToStop. Incredible how, in the space of just one week, a bunch of strangers have come together to support and inspire each other like this. I'm kinda humbled to have been part of this thread. You should ALL be proud of yourselves!