Sober October - Plan Ahead

[notroundthebend]

I managed dry January, even did Feb! Then the virus hit and I went backwards with the wine drinking and it's really got to stop. So sober October it is (and beyond)..! So, Thursday will day one 🙌 join me if you wish.

That was a really interesting read Fanny, especially about the dehydration. I always had a huge glass (500ml ish) of sparkling water after my nightly half bottle of red, nearly always up for the loo in the night not surprisingly. So making a bad night's sleep worse. I don't seem to be drinking anywhere near as many fluids now and am not dehydrated. I got up refreshed this morning and been super active all day. I can tell I'm a much nicer mum and wife for this already. I have ordered a book, the joy of being sober, I like reading positive stories about sobriety. I also had a read of the Al anon case studies on their Web page. They are very sobering

I'm on the lilt tonight. What is everyone else drinking?

Just ordinary plain old builder's tea for me.

Had a lovely dinner though. Homemade garlic mushroom pizza with salad. I'm obsessed with Romaine lettuce at the moment. Always used to buy bags of leaves / rocket etc. until I couldn't get any one time so picked up Romaine. It was love at first crunch. Served with homemade dressing of balsamic, lemon juice, olive oil and honey.

Then half a bar of Lindt Dark Orange chocolate. Couldn't manage the whole bar as I was stuffed.

All washed down with water

Hi, sorry not been posting, it’s been a busy few days. Given up on AF stuff as I find it too sweet so the rest of October will be tea, coffee, water and fizzy drinks. I’ve really enjoyed the no drinking, it’s made life a lot simpler in the evenings. But I am looking forward to a glass of alcohol with Sunday Dinner 🍷

I've had some unexpected cravings this evening, felt like I'd been coasting this for the last few days but would love a large glass of red tonight, it's chilly and dark and the lilt isn't cutting it. Just saw an advert for my favourite red and it's just so tempting. I know I'll be glad tomorrow I haven't given in.

Only a few more days to go! I’m hosting a Sunday lunch for a couple of friends who live nearby. They’re out of work right now due to Covid so I thought an old fashioned roast dinner might cheer them up. I’ll have a glass of wine if I fancy it, but if I don’t, I might just abstain.

I've stopped drinking tea as well as wine - just have a dash of milk with hot water. I always had my tea pretty weak anyway, but my sleep this month has been amazing. Lack of alcohol and caffeine has been brilliant for it. Just wish the kids would get used to the clocks turning back...they wake up obscenely early!😭

I gave up coffee a year ago because I ended up in A&E in the middle of the night with a racing heart. I'd been having problems for ages, had ECGs etc and they kept telling me it was anxiety and gave me beta blockers to take as and when, but I wasn't convinced. This particular night it was off the scale, it felt like my heart was flipping around in my chest like a dying fish. It was terrifying. The doc at the hospital was the first one who asked if I drank coffee. I did. A lot. Would make a strong pot of filter coffee every morning and drink great big mugfuls through the day. So I packed it in and switched to tea (which I know still has caffeine but less), plus herbal teas.

The rapid heart issues settled down without medication (whether giving up the coffee helped with that I don't know) but I've been too scared to go back to it. To be honest I like tea and drink far less of it than I did coffee.

Fanny that's terrible!!! I knew those horrible cans of Monster and drinks like that affect your heart but I never thought coffee would do much. I suppose the cafetière coffee is a lot more potent than a cup of instant, maybe.🤔 I once worked with a man who would take two heaped spoons of coffee and two heaped spoons of sugar in every cup and over the course of a twelve hour shift he would drink around twenty cups. I used to wonder how does he even do that!!

It was pretty scary, but I think they were right and it was down to anxiety. My mum had died, I had loads of shit going on with a relationship and other stuff and just got overwhelmed. I was convinced it was physical had all the medical tests and they couldn't find anything.

I don't think it was the coffee was the cause as I'd drunk it for years but I doubt that amount of caffeine was helping when I was already a bag of jittery nerves. Giving it up was something positive I could do as I really didn't want to go down the medication route. I got out of the relationship, sorted out some other shit and started to take better care of myself (gave up drinking for several months too!), and gradually the heart thing settled down. I started drinking wine again sadly, but never went back on the coffee.

@FannyFernackerpan, that sounds so scary! I am a huge coffee drinker but like it quite weak so have never had a problem with it. My DP last night though - he decided to try this awful looking beer based energy drink. (Probably the German equivalent of Buckfast.) It tasted vile and he came out in an awful rash and had to jump under the shower to cool it off.

I'm still here. Had stopped receiving email notifications so thought everyone had given up giving up! I'm now on 30 days. Woohoo! Has actually been SO much easier than I ever thought and as a general rule I'm not at all bothered by the thought of having a drink. I made a roast dinner last night and with the grim weather a glass of red would have gone down extremely well. Didn't have any in so vaguely considered having a bottle of husbands beer but then thought how pointless it would be and how annoyed with myself I'd be. I've got a vague idea of saving myself for a nice couple of glasses (which will probably become more) on Christmas night after the kids are in bed. But I'm not even that convinced by that! We'll done to everyone who is still going.

Well done user glad to know you are still going strong.

End of the month is coming up so I've started a No Booze November thread for anyone who wants to carry on.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/alcohol_support/4062975-No-Booze-November?watched=1

I've managed to stick with it, last night was hard though, took my son out for dinner for his 18th and other son was on porn star martinis whilst I was on a jug of water

Well done for sticking with it user and 2u. We're all doing so well, I'm going to mark my place on no booze Nov. I have been invited to a friends to dinner on 14th, we are proper wine friends, and share a bottle whenever we meet so will be my first real test. Haven't had a night out that would match it for temptation, so I'll plan to be AF till 14th at least

Well done everyone. We are nearly at the end. Hoho I will join you in the No Drink November one too. It is so much nicer and easier with supportive people like you and the others. I was sooo tempted tonight..had a miserable day at work. My team is so divided. Our manager favours around five members of the team so much and myself and another woman, both part timers, get treated like we are nothing. We are always ranting to each other about it over the phone these days. Sigh...feel like such a second class citizen at work.

BUT - I have just poured myself a nice hot milky drink and might watch some good crime documentaries on YouTube and forget all about work and drink. ☕️

Hoho - you will fly through that test. And feel so great about it. It is a good lift for the old self esteem, soldiering on without turning to booze.

I'm joining the November thread. Must admit my resolve is weakening a bit with these long dark evenings but I know I'm definitely better off not giving in. Luckily my temptation has been coming as I'm preparing dinner and at that point it's too late to nip out and grab a bottle (although it has been known in the past). When I was out at the shops earlier it didn't even cross my mind so that's good. Things to be positive about are: clear decision making, not breathing alcoholic fumes on the kids, not having the kids make comments about Mummy liking wine, good quality sleep (apart from the kids disturbing me!), saving money, losing some cellulite... I'm also not missing the stress of wondering whether I've got enough booze in to meet my 'needs.' Also i hadn't had any health indicators of too much alcohol but the thought that my liver etc can start functioning correctly and hopefully reverse any damage is a great one.

Well done User! It really is the demon drink...the way it creeps in to your brain and takes hold. I think that's a really great strategy to think of all the positives you mentioned. Lol the kids saying that mummy likes wine - I know exactly how that goes!! I must admit, it is a concern for me that my children will see my levels of drinking as normal. So I am doing this for them as well as for me.

A friend sent me this.

For anyone considering carrying on into November ....

digitaleditions.telegraph.co.uk/data/398/reader/reader.html?social#!preferred/0/package/398/pub/398/page/76/article/95934

I couldn't get that page to load Fanny, what was the jist of it? Just checking in this evening, I seem to have settled into a new drinks regime, a decaff Earl Grey or peppermint around 5pm ish, OJ with dinner, lilt afterwards and milk at bedtime. I mix my drinks a lot more now I'm AF.

Sorry about the link, it's weird as it was working earlier but now not.

I've put the same link in the November thread and that one seems to be working ok, but if not, it's an article entitled:

How to keep your Sober October habits for life by Kat Brown. It's a good article about her experience of giving up drinking last year and how 'the benefits just keep on coming'.

I really admire people who stop for good. I like reading the blog Waking the Ghost I think it is called. Marilyn, the author, was a three bottle of wine a day person, completely changed her life by herself, and now works with alcoholic men and women. People like that are just so impressive I think.

I want Sober October and November to be a reset for me. I already know I will be having a drink at Christmas but I shall be doing the dry January. Ideally, I would like to have a drink on special occasions only...that is the dream. To not have it as a regular, normal part of my life but just at Christmas, my birthday and anniversary, for instance.

Hi, can I join you all, please, for No Booze November? I am a lifelong lurker on Mumsnet and now really need to get my act together with alcohol. Epic fail on sober October...

Hi SeaState. It would be great if you could join us. I'm new too and it really does help to have support.