Wankerbastards and autumn weather, crunchy leaves, browning heather. We want crisp, cool days and crisp, cool wine, or beer or gin. But only a couple, as we smash moderatin'.

[Frouby]

Thread 8 for Tryers to be Dryers.

Join in for help and support and lots of laughs to reduce alcohol. Whatever you want to achieve with your alcohol intake, whether it's alcoholidays, dry days, less booze in general we are all in the same boat.

More threads floating around but I can't do clicky links. Just look for Wankerbastards and you will find us.

Just go NC. Mallorca is lovely and with 4 of you it's not like you have to soend tome 1 to 1 with her. Just do as she is doing and don't acknowledge anything is wrong. Fale it til you make it. Then when you are back if it's really bothering you sit her down and tell her how you feel.

Feel rough today and not cos of beer, think Birdflu making a last ditch attempt. It's done what every bug always does and gone to my chest cos asthma so I keep coughing and that's not good for my pelvic floor 😮.

Rode BabyPony again today, she was very good and we managed a little walk around the school all by ourselves which sounds pretty pathetic but it's hard work with a BabyPony without someone on the ground directing proceedings. Have also done 3 HMRC returns, made a shepherds pie, did an hours work, cleared the courgette bed, fed the chooks, picked ds up and went Halloween outfit shopping and just got dd to take and pickup from dragonboating.

Have been thinking as well. Day 1 all the time is a bit negative if you keep having Day 1s and not many Day 2s (like me). So I think we should start our AF week on sundays because Sunday is a good day to start an AF run, then if we are AF sunday, wet Monday and Tuesday but then AF Wednesday, that should be Day 2 and then Thursday AF should be Day 3, wet Friday then if you were AF Saturday that should be Day 4.

Then if anyone has a really good AF run like 11 days they can be 11 DAYS AF instead of 11 days AF.

So my today will be day 3 AF as was dry sun, mon, wet yesterday then will be dry tonight. Hopefully. What do ya fink?

I like your system Frouby, because it doesn't really matter if our AF days are not consecutive. That said i don't think I'll have any more this week as am on holiday now. Well, have finished work at least. In fact have already started as took dc out for tea as a post dentist reward (dd1 has lasting trauma from last time but all was ok today, phew) and it turns out 5-7pm is half price drinks at the place we picked, but none of the half price ones were soft. Couldn't quite face paying over the odds for juice so indulged in a beer. Taking a pause now though till after i get dd1 from brownies.

Longest - those half price drinks..be rude if you didn’t!! I’d have deffo done the same!!

Omg frouby, I love you even more!! That’s an ace idea. So basically counting how many AF days in a week. You’re right. Keep going back to day 1 means we are kinda failing. But actually we aren’t. We’ve come so far 💪🏼 It makes it achievable, so therefore doable!!
So therefore I’ve done 2 days this week 🎉🎉. However I’m wet tonight. Proud of last night. But looked forward to wine alllll day today. So sod it!!
NC4 - I’m with frouby..go for it!! Stay strong girlie xx

NC4, what a horrible situation. I agree, though, that you should go and, as Frouby says, fake it 'til you make it. I do get how difficult it is, though. Hugs.

Frouby, I'm so glad you posted that. I had just come on to register my complete failure on Day 2 today - but you are so right. That would make much more sense. Otherwise we would spend our time feeling like crap (which is what I do, mostly).

Nc4 i totally agree you should go. We will be in menorca till the Saturday. Get a ferry across and join us if its that bad! X

Longest 💖

I’m loving the idea of a Spanish meet-up for NC4 and Longest!

On a borrowed phone and struggling to type. Usual feelings of shame, remorse, misery, failure etc. But I really am going to try to think more like Frouby suggests. If I get through the rest of the week, that would in fact be more days AF than not (though the ‘not’ ones are not remotely moderate). So it might work better for me than this constant sense of Day 2 failure.

I've posted this on the brave babes post, but am posting here too...

I've been here before but have NC just now.

I need help. I am an alcoholic. I drink a bottle of wine and at least one gin and tonic per night. I haven't had an AF day for over a year.

Last night, I went out and made a drunken idiot of myself again - flirting inappropriately (in front of my long suffering husband) and fell over at least once.

I don't know what to do... I don't know how to stop.

fish welcome back. I think recognising you need help is really important. And the very first step. But actually seeking that help is another big thing. Is it worth contacting your GP for advice? .

Only flying in and out to post my epic picture cos I am super proud and chuffed. Rode BabyPony again this morning and think she has clicked with what I want her to do. So am celebrating later. Will definitely not be dry or probably even moderate this week, it's my birthday Tuesday so we are out tomorrow to celebrate and today is friday so yeah. Enough said.

A ferry Longest? The way my friend's been acting, I'd probably swim to Menorca.

(Picturing the end of the Inbetweeners movie now!)

That is a fabulous picture Frouby. Every right to be proud.

Fish I'll just echo what Frouby says - a trip to the GP may be useful? But you're very welcome here too, of course.

Happy birthday Frouby - I'm saying it now and will repeat at various intervals throughout the week. I'm a big believer in the week long birthday celebrations. Chin chin!!

Hi Frouby - best wishes for your birthday!

Yesss - let's start Frouby's birthday celebrations now!!

Love the photo, Frouby. I want BP.

Welcome back, Fish. All I can say is that we are all in our various ways worried by our relationship with alcohol. None of us intended to go beyond the 'normal' "enjoying a drink". Whatever you do, you won't find anyone here judging you.

AF today, but only because hangover, health anxiety, anxiety generally etc. And it is now half term. FML. Two weeks of the bugger.

Frouby, how big is baby pony?
I’m not dry tonight whoops!

Nc4 give me the word and i will swim over. I am miles and miles behind on my swimming challenge so will kill two birds

Am nowhere near dry. Took kids to circus, which was fun, if old skool. Then went for quicj drink with parents from school wgi h was nice. Would have stayed longer but had promised to get back and now have drunk far too much widg and somehow need to get uo and finish packing before flight

hedgehog she's about 14/14.1 I reckon, but about 13.2 wide. Shes a registered highland, born and bred up the side of a glen in Scotland. I bought her direct from her breeder as a 2 year old. She's 6 this time, so late being finished compared to some but they are a very slow growing breed, like big dogs, so have done bits and pieces the last few years but stopped when she's gone bum high or gawky and unbalanced. She was originally supposed to be for me and dd, but dd decided in the summer holidays she didn't want to ride anymore and wouldn't even help me finish her so have finished her by myself. No one on yard to help and didn't want to send her away as she's too kind to be rushed.

Been sitting on her for last few weeks, and managed a few hesitant steps a few times, and had my cousin come up before kids broke up this summer to lead me round on her, but yesterday was the first time she's gone forwards willingly and seemed to get what I wanted from her. Everyone thinks getting on newly backed stuff is the hard part, it's getting them going forwards on their own that is the difficult bit. Am aiming to be trotting round the school and hacking out by the time I go away at Christmas, then in January try and get some lessons booked for us. I am very rusty lol, haven't rode properly for 20 years. Used to be pretty good, and so far it's been like riding a bike. Need to work on both our fitness though.

Feeling slightly hungover this morning but not horrendous. Half a bottle of wine and a couple of beers so not horrendous. Decided not to bother going out tonight, going next Friday instead. Doesn't feel like my birthday yet, and tbh I want to slob out in front of the TV and Get Shit Done tomorrow. Dh cooking me a steak instead 🥰.

Still want to adopt BP, Frouby.

Not dry because half term. FML.

If she decks me will probably give her you dion 😂😂.

Wasn't dry either. 2 beers and 2 wines so not horrendous. Got the usual miracles to shit today. Cleaning, washing, ironing, shopping, Sunday dinner blah blah blah.

Mine don't break up until Friday. Tbh I can't wait, seem to get more done when not doing school run twice a day. And ds is desperate for a break, he's knackered.

Made it to Menorca! Felt embarrassingly hungover most of yesterday. Must do better. Is nice here though. We have a pool (bit chilly but ok) and a footpath leading down to tiny cove. Kids up at dawn yelling though. Gah.

Hope you have a lovely time, Longest.

Good luck longest, hope it’s gone well

Frouby, it’s my birthday this week too, happy birthday to us! I like your thinking on day 1 etc.

Flossie, your dh needs a 👋

Dionysa, half term here too

I’ve been rubbish, not AF since last Monday, am avoiding the app as I don’t want to add all the non AF days on, how stupid is that?! Had The Fear at 4am but slept until 10am and felt ok when I woke up. I’m again wondering about dry November, once half term is over. Maybe I will.

Welcome back fish, we don’t judge on this thread.

Just got over myself and updated my app, I’ve had 6 AF days in October, which is shit, and 118 AF days this year. But far too much on the non AF days so I really need to work on that.

Thanks, Water. I've had The Fear since getting smashed on Thursday and randomly cuddling / holding hands with many random strangers.

I once worked in a big law firm that had an annual dinner dance party. One year, the head of HR got pissed and ran through the ballroom whilst stripped to the waist. Every time I get The Fear, I think of her and how she felt waking after the morning after that!

Christ Fish that poor girl! Can you imagine waking up the next day? Ooof.

I hate BeerFear. Last few times I have been drunk drunk rather than just tipsy I have found myself getting quite belligerent and argumentative. Think I am turning into a Miserable Old Woman when I am drunk. I then wake up at 3am hating myself and worrying what I have said.

Dry here, day 1 of a new week. Despite not drinking sat, sun, mon of last week Inhave had a shocking week units wise and no dry days apart from those. Nearly 1300 calories as well according to my app which is half a pound in weight minimum. Need to do better. Will be dry tomorrow, wet Tuesday cos it's my birthday, then hopefully dry Wednesday and Thursday.

Had a lovely Sunday dinner, gammon and cauliflower cheese and all the trimmings. Can't bloody move now though, ate far too much.

Keeping ds off school tomorrow. He's been really emotional all weekend, cried all the way home from school Friday, slept in til 9.30am, then same again this morning. Been really quiet on allotment this morning and just generally really easy to cry which really isn't like him. So am giving him a duvet day, it's such a long half term for the little ones. Am not sure if he is overtired or coming down with something. They break up friday but I don't think it will hurt for him to have a day off. So we are going to potter around and do some cleaning.

Water, 118 days this year is loads!! You have a good record, even if it doesn't feel like it at the moment.

AF today because of drinking too much last night. It seems that I drink masses on the nights I'm not AF - which is probably even worse than drinking a bit less every night.

Domino's tonight as I couldn't be bothered to think of anything else that everyone will eat without complaint, and I am too hungover to be arsed with people complaining.

Posted too soon. Meant to say Frouby that I think a duvet day is a good idea for DS. I hope he bounces back soon.