Less wets, more dry, sometimes damp. We are tryers to be dryers. Thread 3!

[Frouby]

New thread for those wanting to reduce alcohol. Always supportive and friendly. No judgements, just support to get to where we feel comfortable with our relationship with alcohol. All welcome.

Am a bit rubbish with clicky links but there are previous threads.

Merry Christmas. Not ashamed to say, am gonna open some champers for break any minute

Jealous! Mine have been awake since 5:30. Had self inflicted late night. Ready to go back to bed to be honest. They are happy though. Hope it lasts! X

Longest 10 am and I’m still in bed 🤣 I think I’m milking it now...
Turkey goes in at 11....

Joyeux Noel from France - shared a magnum of red last night and didn't feel it at all this morning, did a nice 10km run with my border collie and didn't see a soul, it was lovely. Going up to the coast for a long walk with DP, DC and dear dog. No booze 'til this evening, champagne in fridge but not sure it will get opened, I prefer red wine!
Have a great day everyone

Merry Christmas! Back at mil's. Survived! Has gone surprisingly well actually. Massive relief. DM and her DP were the most moderate they've been in years, at least up till now. Just breakfast to go but that'll be fine with my aunt and cousins coming round, then we head home via a stopover in Stratford, just because.

Morning to all you lovely dryers.

I was focussing on just getting through yesterday. It is hard to describe how much I hate Christmas, but the worst bit is having to spend it with XH (because "Daddy will be lonely" otherwise). Champagne was open by 12, followed by white. I don't think I had any more than a bottle in total, though, as I got fed up and tired, so watched Call the Midwife and went to bed.

Doing Christmas Dinner Number Two today for extended family, which will be nicer. It will not be dry, though.

I love your phrase, Longest - I actually quite like January. Is dreary but not stressful- is a whole year till Christmas for a start. You said it for me.

I am sorry for having been absent. The lack of technology just heaped yet another bit of awfulness onto my December depression. I have been in a pit of gloom, but will try to heave myself out of it now that Christmas is over.

Frouby, I'm glad your holiday went well and that DH behaved himself!!

Wrongway, very interested to read about sleeping tablets. Which ones are they? I'm tempted to try this myself, especially if it means every other night has to be AF (though it is not unknown for me to mix medication and alcohol, to my shame).

Anglaise, lovely to hear of French Christmas. Bonne Fête (is that French?!)

Flossie, I hope you got through it in once piece, and that your DD2 in particular had a good day.

NC4, mine were up at 6.30 yesterday for the first time since they were toddlers. As they were still in teenage bedtime mode on Christmas Eve (namely 2 am), they were pretty foul by yesterday evening.

Gracey, how are you getting on? I think I might need to adopt a MIL and ask her to stay. Anything that would help...

Well done for getting through it Dionysa. Is there a way to knock seeing XH on the head now kids are getting bigger? Hope Mark 2 went ok. We executed our escape plan and are in Stratford upon Avon youth hostel. Had a fun afternoon exploring and going to Warwick castle today. All the water has gone off though which is a bit annoying.

Morning all

Dion . It's nearly over.

I am drinking everyday. Start on bud at about 3pm, finish on gin at about 10pm. Tolerance levels massively up, can't even seem to get a buzz. Probably the obscene amounts of food we are eating.

Have reached that point in December when January sounds like a good idea.

Off sales shopping to Smyths today with 5 year old ds and his birthday/Christmas money. Dd fecked off to my mums yesterday for their traditional boxing day sleepover then shes stopping at my dsis tonight. So I don't have to worry about her sat in her room on social media at least.

Darts is back on this afternoon tho. More beer/snacks to endure.

Oh Frouby. I could have written your post for you . Tolerance is through the roof. FML.

Longest, I went to Warwick Castle when I was about 8!! XH is a tosser. "Daddy will be lonely". Ha! Daddy should have thought of that before he started abusing the children. I didn't say this, though. But thank God it's over.

Sending you all
Mahoosive hugs for shitty Christmas’s.
Why is it that all the flaws of life are emphasised at Christmas hey?!
I’ve been drinking like a fish. Starting with gin about 5pm and finishing with wine at 10. And drinking anything in between. Not had a day off in ages. Found this Christmas more emotional than ever before.
Ds came home for 10 days from uni, was a total wanker, then left today. The last 10 days I’ve felt abused. If he was my husband I would’ve divorced him!! But for some reason to have a 21yr old son verbally abuse you daily has to be acceptable!! I was nervous about him coming home, found the ten days hellish. Now he’s gone I feel so so guilty that I was relieved to see him go. Feel so so bad about the way I feel. Another reason to drink!!

Hugs all round. Christmas does put everything under the microscope, doesn’t it? My ex-H has been in touch, struggling with it all too. I’m sad for him but also for us.
My kids are at their dads now till NY. I’ve cleaned the house and my new TV came yesterday, so I plan to spend today in front of it. I’d like AF today too. I’m sick of eating and drinking. I feel gross.

Glad it's not just me Flossie. Am drinking from about 3pm. Not a lot, a few beers then a gin or 2. Eating pure shite as well.

But. Christmas is the only time of the year DH doesn't stress about work. We have had some pretty rough Christmas times in the past. DH was discharged one Christmas eve from 2 weeks in hospital after nearly dying. We have had 3 years where companies owing us money have gone bankrupt on us, then my stepbrother died over Christmas. DS was born 13th December so that was a tough one too after a c section.

So my theory is make the most of the ones where we have a bit of money in the bank, we are all healthy and fit and have work to go onto in January.

But come January I really need to be dry 4 days a week, stop eating alldacrap and sort out my house.

Having a chippy for lunch today though

Frouby I'm sure that you will moderate well in January, maybe go all out AF so don't worry.
Flossie sorry about DS what a PITA he is, it must have been horrid for you, he will regret it one day I'm sure.
Dion Christmas with an awful XH poor you, but it sounds like you coped well without too much alcohol.
I had a quiet Christmas with the kids and DP, then the day after he told me that last week he spent Thursday pm and night with his ex which was rather a surprise as on Friday he wanted to marry me. He told me it was a huge mistake (no sex, there never was with her) but the fact he spent the night in her bed was still shocking. He said it was clear it was me he loves and he would phone her while I was there to say he never wanted to see her again. He did that at lunchtime, she was furious as she thought she had him back for good, I think her family lunch was probably not great
I just hope this time he keeps his promise to stay away from her completely, it won't work staying friends as she wants more even if he doesn't. I believe this time he will and he has bought me a ring so I think he does genuinely love me even though he is a weak cowardly bastard as far as beautiful women are concerned, like a lot of men.
On the alcohol front drinking every evening half a bottle of wine so not too bad, but looking forward to being a lot more AF in January.

What a messy situation Anglaise. Do you trust him?
Flossy wtf does your DS think he’s playing at? You’d hope he’d have grown out of vile teenage behaviour by now.

Oh Anglaise. Hugs. I think you know that your DP is lucky to have you - but what a hard situation for you. I have no idea how I would cope with that one. My DP is difficult (as well documented over the course of this thread) - but the idea of him in another woman's bed, albeit without sex, would send me completely demented.

Soaking wet here, again, with no excuse. Other than that DP has gone away, again, and the DC are being shitty.

Flossie, I don't know what it is about these boys. Mine delivered a rant last night and has flounced off to his dad's. Good luck to him with that one.

Frouby, I will try to join you in 4 days AF per week and not eating crap. Try, I say.

Longest, it's hard with XH. The DC start saying that he will be really lonely if he's all on his own. It's hard for me not to say that this would be his own stupid fault. But it's true that he has alienated so many people (including his own family) that he really would be all on his own. Which feels bad, however much of a tosser he has been. Sigh.

Anglais - I hope your dp knows he was wrong. No matter what his excuse was regarding ex’s needs...it’s your needs he needed to put first. I hope he knows how lucky he is to have you xx

Dion - hope you’re ok hunny. Xx

Well I’ve just had the most mental chat with dh. Had this mad idea about doing dry January!! I can’t wven do two nights. How the hell do I think I can do a whole bloody month..a long one at that!! Also for a stressful hosp appointment coming up in January for dd so just know I’ll reach for the Pinot that night!! Ffs

OMG, Flossie. Dry January would be the most amazing thing. Not that I could do it, mind. I am going to listen to Anglaise's hypno recordings again this evening, as I really do have to try to have at least one dry night.

Are you going to go for it Flossie? I agree it would be amazing! I might do a mini version after 7 January. DH wants to try clean living to see if it improves his health. Am not promising to join in totally but may only drink if i am out without him. We have new year and a holiday before then though. I've just done two AF nights in preparation, but my clothes are all really tight again! May attempt some exercise.

Dion are you starting to relax now Christmas is over? I am sleeping better

Oh bloody hell no!!

🤣

I did about 3 weeks of dry jan last year. Was toooooo hard though. Am definetly going to do a dryer january tho. My last 'drink wtf you want day' will be the saturday before they are back at school which I think is the 5th. Dry on the sunday and until at least Wednesday hopefully.

We are well and truely in the Christmas vibe here. Neither of the dcs has gotten dressed, dd has only emerged for her room for snacks and drinks and ds is still in his pants. Am going to chuck him in the bath shortly then put clean pjs on him.

We didn't get up until 9.30am. Absolutely unheard of for us.

Have sorted ds Christmas toys out and they are all upstairs. Also set up his ants nest. Did you know you can buy queen ants on Amazon? I didn't either. She arrived by royal mail yesterday with a little group of worker ants and a cluth of eggs. Currently trying to encourage them to leave the testtube and go to the tank we have set up for them but its a slow process.

Have cracked open a beer and am not even ashamed 😂😂

We were in pjs till lunchtime yesterday and today! They also didn't emerge till 9 yesterday- I was worried! Took them swimming this afternoon but then went to the neighbours for mulled wine.

Is dh's scan tomorrow. Am optimistic about it but hope i am not in for a shock.