if there's one thing you could tell yourself about adoption before you adopted...

[meHoHoHoverhere]

... What would it be?

Plus after reading other posts I totally sympathise and understand those that say they felt they were rubbish and 'doing it wrong '. Be kind to yourself and do your best. Love comfort safety and warmth are what they need in those dark first days when everyone is telling g you how happy you should be and you feel totally shell shocked Good luck xx

That my (adopted) DD would return my love tenfold.

I knew I would love her but I had no idea how much she would love me

[teary emotion] cateblanket..... ditto

One thing isn't enough

Don't expect to love (or even like) your dc straight away, mine hated me with a passion for months, which made it really difficult for me to bond, but it does grow.

Don't try to be super Mum, who cares if the dishes aren't done or the hoovering is done.

Take care of yourself, take time for yourself and take people up in offers of help!

Definitely what Kristingle said.

I relate to the analogy about adoption being like trying to travel to Australia and watching your friends get on flight after flight when you can't get a ticket until until eventually you decide to take a boat.

The journey is long and choppy and sometimes it feels like it takes bloody forever. But on the journey you make some amazing friends, then finally you get there.

You might not be able to return as often as your friends who can fly but you realise that the journey itself and the friends you made have changed you forever.

Of course you've also got to come back with a seasick child possibly feeling quite queasy yourself.... but that too is sometimes quite apt!