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Adoption

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77 replies

PurplePillow · 23/07/2010 15:13

Sorry for shouting in the title but I am sooo excited and nervous!

Finally I recieved a phone call from my link worker to say that he and his boss are coming to see me on Wednesday to discuss a possible match!

i know it's still only a maybe but after being aproved for 3 years my dd and I are bursting with prospective happiness

Just wanted to share

OP posts:
coventgarden · 26/07/2010 19:30

My mother put me up for adoption, the couple got everything ready, then the day before she refused to sign the papers. Bitch. Sorry for swearing.

PurplePillow · 26/07/2010 19:59

Oh god that's awful, my friend went through something similar.. contested adoption but she got her little girl in the end.

sorry for being nosey.

OP posts:
coventgarden · 26/07/2010 20:02

No need to be sorry .

maryz · 28/07/2010 14:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hester · 28/07/2010 19:39

Any luck, PP?

purplehonesty · 28/07/2010 20:17

Its wednesday....how did it go?!! Also can I ask how old is DD? I see you said you've been approved for an 0-5 child so am assuming DD is 7 or older? Is that how it works?
Excited to hear how it went....

Ewe · 28/07/2010 20:20

Oh wow, how exciting!

How did it go?

PurplePillow · 28/07/2010 22:07

It has been a wierd kind of day tbh

I have a 9am meeting, and will maybe know more after that.

It is really wierd and confusing

My head is buzzing, not sure whether to smile or cry tbh

My dd is 10 now we started this process when she was 5.

Will hopefully have more news before the weekend

OP posts:
maryz · 28/07/2010 23:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PurplePillow · 08/08/2010 14:45

Sorry for the delay in update but......

Basically I was told about 2 lo's 1 about 19mnths and another almost 3yrs Shock

I had to think long and hard about these 2 little girls and the impact for them and us..

So now la is having an emergancy meeting on tues and hopefully will only be a few days (for the desission (sp) maker) to give his go ahead then we can finally meet our new 3yr old addition to the family GrinGrinGrin

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KristinaM · 09/08/2010 14:42

fantastic news Smile

melikalikimaka · 09/08/2010 15:05

Good luck with the meeting, you deserve something nice to happen now. Smile

HaveToWearHeels · 09/08/2010 21:24

How lovey, how did you come to the decision on which one to choose ? Please keep us updated.

PurplePillow · 10/08/2010 11:52

The panel unanimously said YES

we are sooo happy GrinGrinGrin

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ProfessorLaytonIsMyLoveSlave · 10/08/2010 11:55

Oooh, congratulations !!! How exciting! When do you get to meet your DD2?

PurplePillow · 10/08/2010 12:01

Not sure yet, have to wait for decission makers approval but hopefully this week or start of next GrinGrinGrin

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EightiesChick · 10/08/2010 12:07

How wonderful! Yes, how did you make the decision?

KristinaM · 10/08/2010 20:34

that's great Smile

make sure that introductions don't last any more than 2 weeks. that's more than enough for a child of that age and for your 10yo

remember to get every last detail about her routine from the Fcs

resist the urge to buy lot of new stuff. its a permanent family she needs, not more stuff. keeping her old stuff is more important to her

purplehonesty · 10/08/2010 20:54

YAY! great news about the 3yo new arrival - can't wait to hear more....
congrats x

PurplePillow · 11/08/2010 11:57

Thanks guy's Grin

I know I'm being silly but on a bit of a downer today, just want to get things moving and knowing planning meeting isn't until 25th (poss sooner) isn't helping.

Really wanted to get things moving quicker if we could so we could do introductions before school started (26th)

She has been to a nursey but link worker has said not to rush trying to get her a place at nursery so thats one question answered.

I'm sitting here trying to think of other things to ask fc when we meet and my mind is a complete blank Blush

The main reason I chose 3 yr old over younger lo is after reading about both of them I was drawn to her more iykwim she so desperately needs nurturing but it's so much more than that....I really can't put it into words.

There are so many reasons I think she needs us but to say too much wouldn't be fair on her. But knowing she was over looked by another family was heartbreaking (didn't know that until after I made my decision)

I hope that all makes sense, my head is still buzzing with the newness of it all and tbh I sobbed a little when I read professorlayton describe her as dd2 GrinGrinGrin

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KristinaM · 11/08/2010 16:00

ask fc about her whole routine, from when she gets up til when she goes to bed.

eg wnat kind of bed does she have? bedding? if she has a favourite duvet covre, see if you can keep ( offer to replace if necessary)

what she eats ( in detail) eg cornflakes not enought, is it tesco ones or kelloggs? kids that age can be VERY fussy and you dont want to add to stress in teh first few weeks. you can always change these things gradually

when does she bathe/shower? how does she have her hair washed? products used? tooth brushing? is she dry at night?

washing powder and fabric softener used ( so her clothes dont smell funny)

how does she wear her hair? haridressesr?

time of meals? when does she have hot meals> supper?

does she watch tv / dvds/ computer? favourte shows/ games / toys

favourite toys ( hopefully these will coem with her)

what things does she like / dislike?

medical / dental issues. is she used to male/ femail pratitioners?

bedtime routine? does she share a room? sleep with light on? have music/ stories?

what discipline / consequences does fc use?

just all the little details that make up the home life of a 3yo

defo hold off nursery for as long as you can - when are you going back to work? "having a routine" is not nearly so important as bonding in these first few months. but you probably need to put her name down now and get funding

HTH

remember to get get any contact with the birth family noted down at planning meeting. also ongoing contcat with FCs

hester · 14/08/2010 22:40

Oh PurplePillow, I'm so happy for you!

I've just got home from introductions with our new daughter, and I feel so exhausted and elated and excited...

Waiting for introductions seemed to take forever, but actually it was useful preparation time.

Keep us posted, won't you?

mymummyisasquarehead · 15/08/2010 06:02

Good luck an dhope it goes well for you x

PurplePillow · 15/08/2010 21:26

Thanks mymummy and hester I will I promise Grin

Thanks very much for the tips KristinaM I am going to meet the FP's tomorrow but lo won't be there but the points you have raised are fantastic.

But on an up note especially for dd1, she was at her friends today when the FP's landed unexpectately (turns out they were my friends oldest's dd's FP's too) so my dd1 got to meet her sister before me but she managed to play it really cool so it didn't cause any problems GrinGrinGrin

I am so proud of how she reacted and she is totally smitten with her Grin

Not posted much as been waiting for things to happen, but kept my self busy with painting a well overdue kitchen and very naughtily buying a few neccessities for dd2's arrival in a few weeks (hopefully)

Will keep you all posted Grin

OP posts:
maryz · 15/08/2010 21:42

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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