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Original poster

If a senior police woman was drunk whilst driving her children around.

27 replies

RockQuinoa · 01/11/2009 17:47

This lady is a really lovely lady. I know her personal life isn't brilliant.

She has two children, I know her from school.

I saw her yesterday as our sons have an activity they do together and she was slurring her words but mostly she stank of booze and couldn't focus very well.

She drove there and back to her house.

I saw her last week also and thought the same but she didn't seem as bad then.

A familiy member was an alcoholic for years and the smell reminded me of that person.

Is there anyway I could report her to a police welfare officer? I'd rather it was anonymous as I'd like her to get help but don't know her well enough to ask/pry.

OP posts:
Original poster
RockQuinoa · 01/11/2009 18:13

Anybody?

OP posts:
harleyd · 01/11/2009 18:18

next time you think she is driving while drunk you need to report her

MadameDuBain · 01/11/2009 18:18

I've no idea what to do, but I do think you must do something and get her stopped - she could kill people. Possibly phone AA or Al-Anon and see if they know the best way to proceed?

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BitOfFun · 01/11/2009 18:20

If this scenario is true, you should have stopped her getting in the car, like you would with any friend. I don't think the police have special kindly taskforce to deal with drunk drivers from their own ranks.

bigstripeytiger · 01/11/2009 18:22

You need to either stop her from driving or call the police if she insists on getting in the care. If she is driving around drunk then she is liable to cause an accident.

Original poster
RockQuinoa · 01/11/2009 18:22

Thank you.

She is not my friend, I am on hello and first name terms with her.

I feel awful.

OP posts:
bigstripeytiger · 01/11/2009 18:24

You will feel worse if she kills someone.

I know that it is hard, and I have been in a similar situation myself, but luckily the person gave up driving (she wasnt willing to give up the alcohol )

BitOfFun · 01/11/2009 18:26

Well, anyone then, they don't have to be a friend. If somebody got in a car who was clearly drunk and they had children with them, what would you normally do? If she is showing up to her work pished, I imagine they have noticed anyway.

Mutt · 01/11/2009 18:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GhoulsAreLoud · 01/11/2009 18:28

I think you should speak to her.

As a last resort certainly report her for driving when drunk if you know that she is, but I really would speak to her first.

She will be fired if she is caught drink driving, I'm not sure but I think they lose their pension too.

Mutt · 01/11/2009 18:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

harleyd · 01/11/2009 18:32

if she is fired its her own stupid fault
she's driving a car drunk
i wouldnt give a toss whats goin on in her personal life, i have no time for drink-drivers

Original poster
RockQuinoa · 01/11/2009 18:32

Oh god why was I such a chinless twat?

I am sat here really imagining that I could have said something.

You are right it would be hideous if anything happened and I hadn't said anything. I know her friend very well and I wonder if it's worth saying anything to her.

I have even changed my name here for fear of others finding her out.

OP posts:
Original poster
RockQuinoa · 01/11/2009 18:34

Thanks Mutt, I am glad you can see how awkward it was/is.

OP posts:
GhoulsAreLoud · 01/11/2009 18:41

I'd still rather have the conversation than watch her get in her car and dial 999.

Stopping her getting into the car at all is safer than the latter, is it not?

motherbeyond · 01/11/2009 18:43

oh, you'll have to do something..if anything happened her life would be a hell of a lot worse than it is now...and for her children too.
i had been on a hen night with a group of girls one was a police woman,we were all really pissed,the taxi stopped outside the brides house were we'd all left our cars.laughing and joking we said goodbye (i assumed she was sleeping at our friends) the taxi pulled away and i watched her get in her car and drive away!

i was so shocked (and pissed) that i didn't do anything. i often think about what could have happened and what i should have done.she had two little girls at home.they mihgt never have seen her again.

some people thimk they are invincible.
you must intervene.
she may be relieved

Mutt · 01/11/2009 18:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
RockQuinoa · 01/11/2009 18:48

I rang AA they were shit.

OP posts:
Mutt · 01/11/2009 18:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
RockQuinoa · 01/11/2009 18:51

He said that what I asked him was the most common question they get asked(ringing about a friend/relative/acquantance).

He told me it wasn't appropriate for me to call him to ask what I did and only until she was ready that they'd be able to help. he couldn't advise in any capacity whatsoever.

OP posts:
GhoulsAreLoud · 01/11/2009 18:51

Sorry, I thought we were talking about what the OP would do if she saw the woman in this state again.

In which case I would not just wait for her to do it again then dial 999, as was suggested. I would stop her getting in the car.

GhoulsAreLoud · 01/11/2009 18:54

You could report her to the professional standards dept at the police, they will be used to dealing with this stuff.

They do all kinds of stuff, I think they do do surveillance on their own staff. If you reported it to them it would probably be dealt with.

Some police officers let off duty police officers off when they're caught drinkdriving, hence them feeling they can get away with it (because they often do).

Allegedly.

shonaspurtle · 01/11/2009 18:58

This is really really hard. The absolutely kindest thing you can do (but yes, it is really hard) is to talk to her now, tell her what you saw and say that if you ever suspect her of driving under the influence again you will call the police and report her.

She will lose her job, her pension but quite frankly, killing another person, her children, her self is worse.

I'm really glad I'm not in your position. Maybe talk to your mutual friend. I do think this is too serious to ignore.

shonaspurtle · 01/11/2009 18:59

Yes, if I did see it again I would stop her getting in the car. Doesn't matter that she's a police woman.

MadameDuBain · 01/11/2009 19:00

Bummer about AA. Do you think he thought you were not really calling about someone else?

Try Al-anon as they are for friends/family members etc I think, so shouldn't have a problem talking about someone else.

Or phone the police (but not 999) to ask their advice (and don't say she's a policewoman).