How does your DH make you feel if your unwell?

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Just that really, I've been unwell the last week with Covid and I think he resents me, I still get up to sort kids but if I'm being honest I'm after been floored with this, if I ask him to do anything its met with a deep sigh or woah I'm only in from work give me a break...
If he was unwell I wouldn't treat him like this.
Also I haven't been this unwell in years!!

Is anyone else's DH similar

I mean if he just got back from work and the first thing I did was give him a list of things to do he might say the same.

But that alone wouldn’t be resentment

Oh mine ignores me, always has done. He doesn't have a nursey bone in his body.

This is less to do with you being unwell and more to do with him being a lazy shite? Do you usually do everything?

My DH is devoted- if I’m unwell he does everything he can to help me feel more comfortable and to recover. I do the same for him, can’t understand why anyone wouldn’t for the person they love.

Sorry OP, he sounds awful. I’m feeling unwell today too. DH had my tea ready within 10 mins of me getting home. Checked I had enough medication in then suggested I go to bed and brought me up a and some chocolate.

I've got cancer and DH couldn't be more caring or helpful

It could be that exactly. When my DMIL was unwell “D”FIL seemed really resentful that his meals and clothes weren’t ready on time and done exactly how he liked them. Also he struggled to realise that their home didn’t magicalled clean and tidy itself.

I’m glad he’s looking after you

He’s an ITU doctor and he doesn’t give a shit when I’m ill! As long as I don’t have meningitis he has little sympathy. I’m guessing empathy burnout (and a bit of a nob)

He sees me as a bit of a hypochondriac, which if I'm honest, I probably am - I have a tendency to think I am 'coming down with something' more often than I am, so he is often sceptical at that stage of an ailment.

When I am actually ill, he looks after me well, e.g. going out late at night to get the exact painkillers I want, making me hot water bottles, fetching me food and drinks and so on.

Honestly speaking I don't usually ask him to do things I just feel like I'm after ruining his day by being unwell.

I was unwell this weekend with some kind of norovirus. I was actually just thinking I never love my husband more than when he takes care of me when I'm sick. I wonder if there is any love greater than cleaning out someone elses sick bowl?

He did everything with the kids, ran me a bath and even cooked the roast.

I realise this sounds too good to be true so I will add that we did have a row the next day when he started throwing up too and I was taking care of him and the kids in return whilst still ill myself. When both parents are ill and the kids still need looking after it is HARD.

He makes me feel looked after. Gets me meds from the shop. Tells me to rest. Listens to my constant whinging

If I’m vomiting, he will be right there holding my hair back. If I’m injured, he’ll help me wash and dress and do everything around the house. He’s even removed stitches for me before!

If I’m (heaven forbid) snotty? That man will leave food, drinks and Lemsip outside of a closed door and run 😂

Where does it say she greets him with a list? She actually said “IF I ask…” and so what if she has a few things to ask of him when she’s floored with illness, isn’t that what a loving relationship should be like? You sound like a man pleaser

I hope you are getting good medical treatment and I'm glad you have your DH to look after you, wishing you well op

I think you can tell a lot about someone by how they are when you're ill. My dad was very kind when I was a kid if I was ill. My mum has always accused anyone who's ill of faking it as she likes all the sympathy on her. My late dh was fine I think.

I feel smothered by my dp when I’m unwell. I’m used to just locking myself in my room and tending to myself. He regularly checks in, asking if I want food/drink/bath running/pain killers etc. I know he means well but he doesn’t understand my need for sleep - he can function very well on very little broken sleep whereas I need as much as possible. And wakes me up every couple of hours. During the night if I cough or make a noise when changing positions he asks if I’m okay, gets rather tedious. I know it’s because he cares but sometimes I just want left alone.

Mine is great, I had breast cancer in 2025, lots of treatment , he was great.

But also great when it’s much less serious.

As I am him!

Yes.
Same here
Husband is 76, thirty years older.
Always does what he can (very healthy).

He mostly ignores me. He also expects me to leave him alone when he’s ill.

my DH would expect me to stay in bed and he’d do everything else.

Ive been terribly ill for a month, resulting in surgery at the weekend and more surgery to come and DH has done everything. Cooking cleaning walking dog sorting kids looking after me. Shouting at me if i try and unload dishwasher!! I genuinely couldnt have coped without him and hes been my rock.

He cares for me exactly the same way I care for him.

If yours doesn't then move on.

My husband could run the household solo better than I could, and as I prefer to be left in peace and darkness when poorly I’m happy with the occasional cup of tea or bit of food. I definitely do not appreciate being fussed over.

He, on the other hand, would love a 24/7 nurse when he’s ill, but unlucky for him I’m not it! It’d be different if he got a serious illness rather than man sniffles, of course.