DP eats his food too quickly

[rangelina]

DP eats his food like it's about snatched away from him.

He can eat a full plate of food maybe twice as fast as me. I'm not a slow eater. He will always finish his plate before anyone else on the table.

He shovels the food down and doesn't pause between eating.

If we're eating at home then fine it's not a big issue. But I do find it really annoying when we go out for a nice meal and he's scoffing his food down in a really uncouth manner and then will say things like "I win". Then I'm sat eating my food and feeling like I am slow.

Inevitably a nice dinner out lasts less than an hour because he eats so quickly!

I've tried being nice and joking that no one is going to take his food away, there is no rush or he can order another course if he's hungry. He wasn't raised with any siblings and wasn't raised poor, with both parents having good table manners.

Has anyone else experienced this?

It's bad for digestion to eat too quickly.
However, once someone is an adult I'm not sure you can police their table manners.

Get him a cong or feeding mat OP!

But that assumes one person is in the right. What if he said he struggles with how slowly OP eats- dawdling and faffing, and if she cared about him she'd crack on. It's upsetting to see her letting food go cold while she pokes around at it. If dragging a meal out indefinitely is more important to her than the comfort of her partner...

this has reminded me: 1970s primary school - dinner ladies forever saying "less chat more chomp" :)

I’m a fast eater. No idea why. I just don’t find having dinner a social event. I eat because I need food. I can’t set my fork down to chat in the middle.

'What do you win, dear? A lapel badge with GREEDY PIG on it?'

Poor manners and socialisation, failure to adapt behaviour to situation.

Going out for dinner with someone is about conversation, back and forth. Pace of ordering, cooking and eating supports that. One person bolting food (so not talking) then sitting staring while the other person eats, or having to monologue, makes the sole diner feel uncomfortable. Poor manners, misunderstanding of a social situation.

I internally grimaced at this- I'm the fast eater in our relationship!

I always finish before everyone else because a) I hate my food going cold and b) I could go days without eating as a child. So think it's an inbuilt mechanism for me. I also have my fridge, cupboards and freezer always stocked up. Again it's from not having food as a child. I hate the thought of not having food in the house and the dc going hungry.

You absolutely can though, and you can learn good table manners.
I eat 99% of my meals at home, on the couch, with just a fork, I do not eat like this in public because it would be incredibly rude and uncouth.

What I really can’t stand is the fast eater then firing questions at the person who’s still eating. As if that’s their best attempt at ‘conversation’. It’s like dining with a demanding toddler.

You finish first, you carry the conversation, allowing the other person opportunity to chew.

Uncouth? Jeez, I’m not shovelling it in. I’m eating like a perfectly civilised person. I just don’t find it a social event. If I’m served food, I eat the food.

Ewwww
ick
@DonewhatIcando

Him - "I win!!"

OP - "Win what - the Greedy Pig of the Year contest?"

@FizzyColaBottle8

you absolutely can though. Going out for a meal and not engaging with your companions because you can’t take a break from getting the food down as quickly as possible is very anti social

I used to date a former priest who was the same. Not uncouth, but he would have a clean plate in 10-15 minutes. When he was in the monastery they had a pretty short window for meals so it was just second mature to him. Quite annoying, especially when out.

At home, no, not necessarily a social event, though I like us to sit down together. Out for dinner is absolutely a social event, not just an alternative venue for getting food into you!

I am a fast eater. I hate my food being cold and also grew up with lots of siblings. Luckily my DH is Army and does the same. We eat fast and then can go do something more fun!

My friend went to boarding school, she said you learnt to eat fast or go hungry

Exactly.
You adapt your way of eating to the situation.

If I invited someone for dinner and they just bolted their food without any interaction I'd think twice about inviting them again.

I didn't go to boarding school but I did go to a private girls school where we all sat down at long tables and ate together family style. We had a teacher at the head of each table and we were told off if we ate too fast and were encouraged to pace ourselves and to converse, and I realise now that we were being taught how to eat properly at a dinner table.
It's interesting that boarding schools don't have a similar experience.

but then they have a conversation about it? lie grown adults?

Table manners are a life skill.
Is he like this at important occasions such as weddings or formal dinners?

I can't bear seeing people bolt their food, hold cutlery from underneath, make a mess, anything like that.
Ugh.

Who doesn’t clear a plate in less than 15 minutes? Under 5 minutes is fast. 10-15 mins is normal if not a bit slow.

we did at lunchtime when the teachers ate with us. We didn't at breakfast, tea or supper when they didn't. In theory the 6th former at the head ot the table portioned everything out fairly - but then bread, butter and other things that were put out for us all to eat went to those who moved faster.

In the army it was usually eat fast because you had very limited (often unknown) time to get your food down and then get on to the next thing.

But as pp said: in the mess, or other social occasions you adapted yourself to the situation, so not eating fast, or taking more than a normal amount from a buffet etc.