Best creepy-male putdown ever?

[Imdunfer]

I think I've got one of the best.

Years and years ago when I was first engaged I had a very creepy boss who had even made comments about my backside. I told my fiance, who was a tall man (still is, but now my husband). At the time he had a bright yellow car. One day he came to pick me up from work in it. My boss was a short man and he was standing between us looking into the car. He commented on what a lovely colour it was.

Looking straight into my eyes across my boss's head and the roof of the car, my DH replied "yes, the only trouble with it is that it does attract insects".

Can you beat that ?

See post above.

I've heard this before a number of times. It's quite an old story It's called the 'daddy-stitch.' This man you experienced was far from the last man to ask for his wife's vagina to be tightened up (for him!) Seems quite a number of men are not too well endowed.

https://www.buzzfeed.com/kristatorres/heres-everything-you-need-to-know-about-the-daddy-stitch-in

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I always remember some husband said this in a Mother & Baby magazine interview chat 30 years ago.
I've never forgotten how crass it sounded, but it was seemingly totally accepted by his wife/the journalist and the Magazine's editor as a cheeky chappie thing to say. 🤨

This.

Standing in a burger van queue after a night out many (too many years ago).

Man serving: wow, I wish my dick was as big as your nose!

Me: I wish my tit's were as big as your mouth

I had a pervy tradesman come to install something make a very slightly lewd comment about dd and having a teen in the house while he was working. I told him with a slight growl that if he thought a house full of women all going through immense hormonal changes was in any way "fun" he probably hadn't got to know many. It got him to finish up quickly anyway!

Did the short boss man in the OP get the joke or just go ?

And that the boss was attracted to the boyfriend as it was his car. To me, it’s just a nonsensical reply.

Oooo, excellent put-down 👏

I don’t really get it either! Well, I do, but I don’t think it’s some sort of clever put down. I’m intrigued to know if the boss got it or if it went over his head.

Well, he was quite short...

He won’t have equated himself with an insect, whatever size he was. It’s bizarre that anyone thinks this was a witty riposte.

If this thread shows anything, it’s that withering put downs are almost uniformly embarrassingly shit 🤣

He went very quiet.

😂🤣😂

I'd just like to thank everyone who is joining in the thread in the spirit that was intended.

Can I remind anyone else that other threads are available.

None of these are “put downs” though.

The insect one was a put down, albeit not in the least bit clever.

I refer you to my answer to the two people before you who have made your first point and my post immediately above this one for your second point.

Oh, you got there before me!

And I see others have commented on the embarrassing insect put down too.

Must read full thread… 😬

When I was very much younger, a much older guy in the pub (I was out with friends) tried chatting me up. I explained that I was very happily married but he was persistent "don't you fancy a bit on the side?" "No thanks, you look more like leftovers" He skulked off and left me alone after that 😂

Probably wondering what the hell your chap was talking about.

I’ve got a bright yellow car. People often make comment on the colour in a small talk fashion. They say nice colour, you say it attracts insects. That’s the end of the small talk interlude.

Like when someone says what a lovely day and the other person says rain is forecast tomorrow. It’s just small talk.

Out with a group of friends in the evening for a hen celebration. A group of uncouth young men tried to latch onto us. One of them leered "where are you going after this?" Quick witted friend shot back "nowhere that will let you in". They disappeared pretty quickly.

Great one!

I work with a doctor who was mistaken for AI. She was thrilled! 😆 she is German, I've no idea if that was the reason, her style of writing in English!

I don't know how you manage to think quickly enough, great answer.