How can I politely stop exchanging birthday presents with a hobby friend?

[GoldMoon]

I do a hobby that I have done for around 5 years . There are approx 8/10 of us that meet monthly . We are friendly with each other and usually go for a drink afterwards but we don't meet up at any other time .
One lady buys me a birthday present every year so I ( reluctantly reciprocate ) I don't want to continue to do this and have strongly suggested we stop but she does not take the hint .
My birthday is earlier in the year & hers later . We have both had our birthdays ( and presents ) but I want to end the year by once again saying let's not buy next year .
Rather than just verbally say it I plan to send a text / email or WhatsApp but what do I say ? Any suggestions greatfully received .

Don’t buy her one to reciprocate. If she’s bothered, she’ll stop if she’s not she’ll carry on.

She's a very nice person and I know 100% she would continue even if I stopped .

"Hi Jenny, I've been looking at my budget for 2027 and I've decided only to exchange birthday gifts with close family, so please do cross me off your list to buy for next year - we'll just do cards. See you soon!"

Maybe suggest going out for coffee or lunch instead of presents to celebrate your birthday.

I'd say that you've been thinking about how commercial birthdays have become and at "our age" you really don't need gifts. So you've decided to make small charitable donations instead and hope that others would feel free to stop buying you gifts, although cards are still appreciated. Try and make it sound like it's not just aimed at her, personally.

I did that for Christmas as she used to buy for then as well . It worked as I said I'd rather she donated the value to charity / foodbank and that seems to be working so maybe I could try that tactic .

She does sound really lovely, but I completely understand your dilemma too. Perhaps you could say that you really appreciate her thoughtfulness and the gifts she’s given you, but that your financial circumstances have changed, so buying presents for people outside of your immediate family is a little difficult for you at the moment.

You could also explain that you find it quite hard to receive gifts when you feel you can’t reciprocate in the same way and that you’d therefore feel more comfortable keeping things small and meaningful, perhaps a lovely card or thoughtful message instead. That way, you’re still acknowledging and appreciating her kindness, but in a way that feels balanced and manageable within your means.

I know that me saying it would be due to financial difficulties she would continue to give a present and not expect one back .
I think I'm just going to have to say I don't want to send or receive and be seen as being quite blunt about it .

Perhaps you could build on that - along the lines of, it worked so well last Christmas to give to charity instead of buying gifts, I'd like to do the same for my birthday next year.