10 year old speaking for herself to GP

[Rainallnight]

This is a bit random but here goes.

My 10 year old DD can speak to the GP herself about her symptoms if she’s poorly. I’m really proud I’ve encouraged her to do this and that she can do it. It’s an important life skill.

She is adopted and struggles in many areas of life.

I was wondering if all ten year olds can do this or am I justifiably impressed? 😂

I think many could do this but would prefer their parent to be there with them. It is something to be proud of!

It’s a good thing and not precocious as someone rudely suggested upthread.

How was that rude @Chocolateforbreakfasttoday ?

Thats not nice.

As another adoptive parent, I think you should be very proud. The first few comments are tone deaf.

My oldest sits looking blank (boy) until I speak, then argues I am wrong.

Look up the dictionary definition.
It is as far from not nice as your misunderstanding is.

In my experience the GP speaks directly to the child anyway (then I fill in any gaps that I think they've missed). So I guess I'm not sure exactly what you mean. But if you've helped an adopted child to confidence in any way then you have my admiration and comparison is the thief of joy. Keep being proud.

Agree - they all mature at different rates.

It is lovely to watch your children fledging isn’t is. And moreso when they’ve had a difficult start.

I work in paediatric healthcare. I always speak to the child and ask them if they want to answer my questions. Obv the degree to which they can do so is age dependent. 5yos need more help than older kids.

I find it comment worthy when I have an older child who has indicated they want to talk and then their parent talks over them. It’s different if the kids indicates they don’t want to talk - some are simply shy or have additional needs that make this tricky.

Does it matter if other children can also do this? You’re perfectly within your right to feel proud of whatever feels like an achievement for you as a parent or her as a child. Well done to her and to you 👏🏻

Are you saying that your child sees the GP alone, or that you are in the room and they speak for themselves?

DD is 13 and autistic, she can and does speak for herself with her hospital team (chronic condition) and with a GP she has seen a few times, however, she would struggle with a first time interaction and would look to me for reassurance.

I think people dismissing you have not read the bit where you says she is adopted. Often trust is a huge deal for these kids and therefore talking to someone they don't know about something that has the potential to be scary, intimidating, possible intimate but definitely puts them in a vulnerable position is a big deal.

You habe every right to be proud @Rainallnight

'Precocious' isn't an insult, people! It just means developing ahead of time (as in 'precocious puberty').

It became associated with brattishness because the pride that parents feel at what they perceive as a precocious ability often leads them to be a bit over-indulgent. They are proud of their child's conversation and play, and expect other adults to enjoy it, leading to the child feeling entitled to constant attention, which bis draining and aggravating for everyone around them.

Ww live in a little village so see the same doctors. They were always impressed with the skills of my 2 year old, able to communicate very well even then.

Obviously I assist but at 7 now she is more than capable and they still find her remarkable. Her elder sister is also very good at, so i don't think at age 10 its particularly amazing no, a good life skill developed early though for sure!

I think it is probably the GP that should feel proud, in that they have successfully done what they are trained to do - ie engage the child as much as is realistic. All ten-year-olds can describe their symptoms, if they are made to feel at ease.

Sorry OP. I'm sure she's great but I'd be shocked if a 10 year old couldn't articulate this.

I think that's impressive!

Mine would respond to questions like where does it hurt and is your throat sore or whatever. Might launch into a big tale about how they hit their head...

I am glad to read that. I brought my child up to have confidence and to be articulate, look people directly in the eyes when addressing them, all that. It worked.

Your daughter has a good mum and I've no doubt she'd ask you if she needed extra help or support.

@Rainallnight Don't want to shit on your parade but in general the GP adresses the child directly (all mine have since my children were very young). I would say a 7 year old should be able to do this if no Sen. My DS1 is 16 autistic and shy so he still looks at me when the Dr speaks to him even though he's very capable. DS2 has talked to the doctor by himself since he was 7-8 which I think is normal.

You should be very proud of your DD @Rainallnight what an achievement 😊
Well done you and her 💐

When my DD had an apprendicities aged seven, she was able to tell hospital staff where the pain was, how she was feeling and that she'd been sick and it was an odd green. She was in a lot of pain, but they were actually asking questions and she was the one who knew exactly where the pain was, how she felt. Only thing I added to it was that I'd put a thermometer on the inside of her groin, and on the side of her apprendix the gauge shot up.

Mine couldn't do that. We didn't know why at the time. It wasn't that she was shy. It wasn't until 11.5 that we found that she had an expressive language disorder and got the help that she needed. Your daughter is doing well.