Are you suppose to know what you want to do in life by year 12?

[Whenthecriwdsayno]

My son is doing A Levels at a Sixth form college but isn’t fully sure what he wants to do after.

He is doing Media, Business and Sociology. Said during the interview that he is interested in social media and advertising but then told me he just said that he isn’t sure.

I dropped out of Sixth form being pregnant with him so I don’t know the pathways or how sure at this stage of sixth form he is supposed to be.

On another thread people are saying to go to Uni open days in Autumn but I don’t think he is even thinking about Uni or how close that could be.

How can I help guide him and what should I be doing?

Hmm not sure how well he was advised with those A levels. Sociology fine but the other two aren’t considered particularly academic, though are accepted as A levels and would fit into the ‘marketing’ career path, and if not even thinking of uni they would suit a apprenticeship, like a level 3/4 one in recruitment, sales/marketing, HR, event planning etc. Far too many people think a degree is essential when for many it’s a waste of three years and costs a lot of money!
As for what YOU should be doing… not a lot. Your YP should see the careers advisor at school and do some research about local FE colleges and see what they offer.

No!
In Yr 12, DS was thinking Grad Schemes after Uni. He's now an academic. Read Classics.

In Yr 13 DD was thinking Drama/professional singing (her voice is classically trained), in Yr 13 possibly law. She's now a secondary school English teacher. Read Theology.

Let your DS find his way and have a stab at following his dreams.

I still don't know what career path to follow. I left school in 1978 and just retired!!

Some young people are going to know what they want to do as a career, often those whose families are in similar professions, but many others won't have any specific idea. The best thing to do is take exams in subjects you are good at, and then wait and see.

Sorry but I completely disagree, it doesn’t matter how ‘academic’ a subject is, if it’s something you’re interested in and have an aptitude for then there’s no ‘wrong’ subject. The worse thing you can do is go for an ‘academic’ subject because you think you should and then end up struggling because you’re either bored or don’t have the ability for it.

To answer you OP, my DS is in year 12, doing a levels. He doesn’t know what he wants to do yet career wise other than not go to university. He’d like an apprenticeship so he’s going to take this year and next to finish his a levels, get his drivers license, see what apprenticeships are available. We’ve suggested he keeps an open mind about uni as he might change his mind.

No I don’t think you have to know, I certainly didn’t and neither did most of my friends at that age. Some went to uni, others didn’t. But we’ve all found our way in life in some way or another.

It can be helpful to have an idea of what direction you want to go in and no doubt some kids have very clear goals. But I think the majority just wing it and see where it takes them.

If he's not sure, then he could choose a subject that relates to an area he's more interested in, and the others something he enjoys.

DD want to do music for a few years, even asked if we could apply for a scholarship (which she got). Absolutely enjoyed the experience but a few months before uni choices, she decided she wanted to do sustainability, luckily she had chosen geography as something she enjoyed and particularly covered this.

She's now an environmental consultant. Funnily enough she'd would like to be a batista so if ever between jobs she'd do that.

So one thing I’d recommend is, if he thinks that university is where he’d like to be, is to look at degree programmes that interest him and see what entry requirements they have. I mean at this stage, I suppose he’s chosen his A levels but perhaps there is still room for adjustment. But this will at least give him a sense of where his interests might lead him and if there is anything he hasn’t thought about.

But no, absolutely not. No 16/17 year old should know what they want to do for a career and even if they did there is a good chance they won’t do it forever. I was an academic and worked in a very niche academic field for 20 years before changing careers. What I did know at 16/17 is what interested me. Same with Dh. Neither of us are doing what we thought we’d be doing at that age. Neither of us are doing what we once were doing in our ‘first jobs’ in our 20s. But we are doing things that still very much reflect longstanding passions.

I’d suggest he study things he enjoys and finds interesting. If those don’t immediately map onto a career or a university place, that’s fine. He can take a gap year, go travelling, go volunteer planting trees or help a charity set up their social media presence, start a little business, get an apprenticeship, get a job in a related field, etc. Uni will always be there next year once he’s convinced about the direction he wants to go in, but at his age, there really is no rush.

If your son thinks it's at least possible that he might want to go to university, I would encourage him to look up when universities local to you are having their open days, sign up to some subject talks, and go along and listen. Even if he's sure he doesn't want to go to those particular universities, it's still likely to be helpful for him to listen to some subject talks. If he realises that he doesn't want to study a particular subject, that's also useful.

lol I didn’t

if you go to uni open days he’ll get a sense of what he likes and doesn’t like. It’s often easier to list what you don’t want to do.

at this age the options are broadly further study or get a job.

I don't think most adults know do they? Let alone Yr 12?! I've always told my kids to do what they enjoy and not to worry about having more than one job/career if they change their mind.
The pressure out there is bonkers!

Of course not. The system in this country is completely batshit. Other countries like the US allow kids to study multiple different subjects throughout uni which we should 100% trial here. The fact we expect a 16 year old to know who they are enough to decide their whole future career path is nothing short of insane.

Thank you 😮‍💨
The way people were talking on another thread I felt like he had missed his chance and that you had to get on the path now or miss it.

I think most people sort of fall into jobs/careers etc don't they? Not many folk think oooh I must be a teacher/bricklayer etc etc I think your son will be just fine op - don't listen to all the nonsense/b*llshit .
Go to college/uni open days of course to see what's out there without pressure to make life changing decisions! X

@Sartrecompletely agree - it's nuts and so stressful for the kids!

Indeed. Then stumble into a career you think you should do which follows on from the subject you thought you ought to do. Without ever thinking about what you really wanted to do.

No of course not. He should be thinking of what he wants to do after 6th form though and if it’s definitely university he needs to be looking at what courses he likes the look of and which universities. Then open days during year 12/over the summer to be able to do UCAS applications beginning of year 13.

I didn’t know really what I wanted to do with my life when I was in year 12 so I applied for degrees I was interested in and had a few different career options.

He should start with his favourite A level and work from there looking for related degrees and career prospects

Some people do. Remember that people change though. I thought I knew and I did two degrees to lead to it, worked in it for a decade then… I changed.

Now I’m 31 and have gone back to uni to retrain. Nobody says you can’t change your mind and do a different career after the first one. People don’t have jobs for life anymore.