10 year old night waking

[Worriedmum40284]

DS10 has been waking through the night for the last few months, pretty much every night. He comes into us saying he is scared or has had a bad dream and is very hard to get back to bed. He is very scared of the dark.

We've tried different lighting options, rearranging his room a little, audio books but the issue persists. During the day he's such a confident child - no big changes in his life and no concerns/points of stress. He also recently camped with a group he belongs to, hours away from home for multiple nights and breezed through it.

It feels like the night waking has become a habit now and not sure how to help him (and us!) He used to sleep absolutely fine. Does anyone have any advice or suggestions of what else we could try?

Oh this is tough. I have an 11 year old who is scared at night. She mainly takes ages to settle and comes back down after being put to bed, but sometimes wakes in the night too. We have tried some meditation cards before bed and leaving them available so she can use them if she wakes up. She has a fairly bright nightlight plus another option if she needs to read or use her cards. She also listens to audio books when settling to sleep, so if she wakes she puts it back on which sometimes helps her to settle again. When she comes in to us in the night, we give her a quick cuddle and then send her back to bed where she can then read for 10 mins and I check on her after the 10 mins is up and that can be helpful as it's the same every time and predictable. I really feel for you as it's so tough when they are unhappy but everyone needs their sleep!

Thanks @Craftyroseand sorry your DD struggles at night too.

Getting to sleep isn't a problem for DS - he just wakes up after a while and automatically becomes scared so gets up and come into us, rather than try to get back to sleep. We encourage him to put his audio book back on but he wants us to go in and do it. And he will refuse to walk back in to his room by himself - he'll stand by our bed becoming more and more upset. Sometimes we relent and bring him into our bed, but he's becoming quite big to do that now! More often than not we walk him back and have to lay on his floor until he settles (which he doesn't need when first going to sleep).

I've no idea where it's come from unfortunately.

Would a gradual retreat work when you take him back? Maybe stay for 10 mins and then check in 5. Then stay for less time and check after a longer period? Another thing my daughter has found useful is using the Kooth service on her iPad. (in the daytime, not at night!) It's a chat service where they can chat to a counsellor for up to an hour once a week. She has shared some of her issues with them and they have suggested some techniques for her to try. She did it last night as she was anxious about secondary school. It helps them to see that their troubles are valid and helps to chat through it with someone who isn't as emotionally involved.