"How do people get other people pregnant?"

[Cattenberg]

My eight-year-old asked me this at bedtime. I fobbed her off by saying it was far too late to talk about that now. But I expect she'll ask again. Would you tell her, or say she's too young and we'll talk about it when she's older?

DD was conceived by IVF and knows a bit about that. I don't think she knows exactly what sex is, although I think she's guessed something vaguely close to the truth.

My 8 year old is at a Scottish school and they have done some very basic facts of life at school already. Funnily enough she hasn’t asked more about it but we’re watching Ghosts together on the BBC and one of the innocent ghost characters is v curious about ‘how babies are made’…so I wonder if she’ll start asking me more. I think I will try to be matter of fact about the whole thing, no euphemisms.

I’d tell her at 8 (and possibly younger).

You made her by the doctors putting Dad’s sperm with mums egg and then putting that into your uterus. A lot of mums and dads do that at home without the doctors.

If she asks how, nothing wrong with saying the penis goes into the vagina. It’s true, natural and scientific. It doesn’t need to be more graphic or sexualised at age 8.

You need to answer her openly and honestly but keep it simple. Eight is exactly the age when she should know the basics. It is likely that there will have been talk in the school playground or amongst other kids she mixes with. Giving her an honest clear answer will prevent misunderstanding and half understood whispering from the playground.

‘Let’s talk about where babies come from’ is an age appropriate book. It’s good for you to read to her first time for any questions…. It’s always better to answer these questions, she could find out from the playground.

Tell her, much better to be given a proper explanation. I remember as a child we had a book. We couldn’t care less about the mechanics but thought it was hilarious there was pictures of bottoms.

It’s just biology. Tell her the basics before she hears from someone else. 8 is fine. Maybe get her a book on it. I had Claire Rayner’s ‘The body book’ when I was a child and my kids had ‘Where Willy went’ which was good but sort of missed or glossed over the crucial moment.

I’ve told my 6 year old that mummy’s have eggs in there bodies and daddy’s have seeds (probably wasn’t the best word to choose on the spot) and when they joint together in the mummy’s tummy a baby grows. She hasn’t asked yet how the seed gets in there. But I think it’s good for them to know the basics early on.

My oldest is 8 and naturally very curious. I'm pregnant so naturally, there have been questions about "how the baby is part dad too?". I've given her the basics, including the mechanics. I think it's probably about the right age.

Thanks everyone. I'll see if I can find a copy of The Body Book.

How is it she doesn’t know years ago? It’s easier to explain basic biology to a child than how airplane fly or how electricity works!

She's going into prubity soon so I think she should know as around this age she should know about her body more like why do I have a period and discharge like she doesn't need to know s lot but most of the time kids will just search it up so I think it's better coming from a parent then internet

I think if they’re old enough to ask the question they’re old enough to get some form of age appropriate answer. As pp said, it is just biology and good to think of it and present it that way for a young child.

My sister got her period at 8… you should just tell her

Yes, mine was nine, and this was the mid-80s, and no one had told her, and she got a terrible shock.

This is a great response. Kids need to be told the facts otherwise they fill in the gaps with rumours.

I told mine when they asked. Think they were also around 8. I told them the truth as to what sex was and how babies were made. Dd was very sympathetic that I’d had to have sex twice to have her and her brother which did make me laugh! You can just explain it as factually as you can and they will probably be grossed out but then at least they won’t feel stupid when it comes to sex ed at school and they know basic facts of life. I had a friend who told her 9 year old that if you love someone you get Married and pregnant and she genuinely thought that it magically happened for a while and had a shock when she was older and found out the truth.

I was in the car with DD and DGD recently and DGD (nearly 9) asked how the babies in mummies tummies get out! Not sure what DD told her.

I did tell DD about periods and other changes at puberty recently, as she saw period products in the bathroom bin and kept asking about them. My mum thought she didn't need to know this yet. My mum would probably say that DD doesn't need to know about sex yet either.

DD has seen frogs mating in the pond and I told her about the female releasing her eggs and the male fertilising them. But talking about sex is more daunting!

Can I still breastfeed without a pump my baby is trying to breastfeed I don't get paid for a few weeks to buy a breast pump yet so it wouldn't arrive for about 2 to 4 weeks

More people will see your post if you start your own thread.

“Where Willy Went” is a good book on this.

I second this.

As soon as they start asking questions that’s when you tell them, even if it’s very young. It’s better they know and get it right from the beginning than end up guessing and not understanding things.

I have two dc now aged 23 and 14 and I think I was talking to them about it all from around 5/6 ish.

Thank you all. I think I'll buy Where Willy Went. I was going to buy The Body Book, but am slightly perturbed by the illustration of a man's erection - with a dog and cat playing around a sofa in the background. I don't think they should have to watch!

I told my DD at 8. I bought a book and we looked through it together, it worked pretty well. It was Let’s Talk About Where Babies Come From. She particularly liked the illustrations of the baby growing in the womb.

Lol.

I was very right on with DD1 and explained the whole shebang to her when she was about 3 and DC 2 arrived.

It was all hugely surprising news to her when she got to 9.