Constantly worrying about my adult son and not sure how to stop

[Goldtree2]

Please dont be too harsh on me!
I worry constantly about ds. He has asd and had a really hard time at school. He is 20 now, has a part time job and is doing ok.
He doesnt have any friends, he is friendly with colleagues and goes to 2 different hobby groups. Seems happy in himself. But I worry constantly about him. Currently I worry about him driving, he passed his test about 7 months ago, he had a accident within the first 3 months but got a new car and no problems since. But I worry everytime he goes out.
His car has also been giving him problems and now im worried he has been ripped off and will loose even more money if it is not repairable. I feel like i should have advised him better on what to buy.
If he is at home I worry he should be socialising more. I think I've just got myself in a pattern of being constantly on edge with him, its really getting me down.
I dont know what advice im looking for really.

Yes! I only have DS and worry non stop.
exactly the same as you.

I think it’s normal to worry however yours does sound a bit excessive. I have a 20yo ND dd so I get it but I am trying to accept dd is an adult now 🤷‍♀️

Worrying doesn’t actually achieve anything, it just drains energy.

I am also worried massively about my 22 year old son and the big relief for me is that he's at home and not living away (it's a really long story) so I have nothing helpful to say but I'm empathising!

Me too ! In their 30s both single doesn't get any easier I'm afraid.

I thought everyone would tell me to pull myself together! It's massively draining, I just can't wait to hear the key in the door.
I hope it improves, but I suppose one worry will just replace another

I think it's normal. I only have young DC but I moved in with my mum myself for a while in my 30s and she still worried about me! Different when I wasn't living there before/since, then she only worries if I tell her something that's bothering me, but while I was there, she was right back to listening for that key in the door. Never pestered me or anything, I'm not complaining! I did make sure to text her if I wasn't come home etc though to put her mind at east (she didn't ask me to).