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Laughed at for how I speak.

25 replies

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2026 17:58

I have ADHD.Sometimes when I'm excited or nervous my speech can be rambling and hard to understand.(ive been told this before.)
Today it happened so when I replied to a group one of them said did you get any of that.To which the young ones giggled and the person old enough to know better laughed.Then said sorry I can't understand what you said.
I feel embarrassed and will look into speech therapy although at 60 is it worth it?
Anyone struggle with this,

OP posts:
WallaceinAnderland · 26/08/2026 18:02

They were just making light of it because they couldn't actually understand what you were saying and tried to let you know in a breezy way. Maybe it was clumsy and they should just have said can you repeat that more slowly please?

Would it have made a difference to you how they phrased it?

WonderingWanda · 26/08/2026 18:02

Do the people that couldn't follow your train of thought know you have adhd? It was a bit mean of them if so. If they don't know or maybe they don't realise this is how your adhd presents you could just say "Sorry, this is the trouble with adhd" if they continue to laugh at you then maybe they aren't great friends.

Tunaboona · 26/08/2026 18:04

Next time just say "oh I was just saying how you are all a bunch of cunts" and walk away with your best theme song in your head.

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2026 18:18

Tunaboona that is inspired.🤣🤣
They know but I don't think they know the symptoms.

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beaglescurleduplikebagels · 26/08/2026 18:19

I really struggle when people talk too quickly but they absolutely should have been more sensitive.

Didion · 26/08/2026 18:21

Lighten up. You spoke incoherently and a joke was made about it.

No big deal.

Definitelygoing · 26/08/2026 18:23

I think it was very rude and I'd have felt very hurt. I was bullied about my voice at school, and that sort of thing brings it back. I'm not sure whether speech therapy would help but you could look into it, but otherwise I suppose I'd try to get over it and move on.

Yellowundermarine · 26/08/2026 18:24

I have adhd and I get this all the time. I can also slur my words or almost stutter. I just say sorry and try to repeat myself more coherently xx

IPM · 26/08/2026 18:24

I ramble when I'm nervous or excited too.

I just point at my own mouth and say, "I'm sorry, I have no idea what that was either" 🤣

But ultimately if you don't/can't find it funny then I guess that's up to you.

You don't have to.

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2026 18:28

Fair enough that is a good way to handle it.
Personally I wouldn't laugh at someone's speech.
My DD had speech therapy and called it peach therapy.

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VieuxFort · 26/08/2026 18:31

I think self deprecation is your friend here. Just laugh about it.

GladBiscuit · 26/08/2026 18:38

I have AuDHD. The other day I cried to myself about being told I’m ‘too much’ by an family member again. Oh ha ha. I keep it private though and never say anything. It’s very saddening to be told you’re too much and simultaneously told you don’t speak enough, you don’t talk the right way, you handled that social interaction wrong all your life. Gotta have thick skin in this neurodivergent game, and I very much don’t!!

bitontheobtuse · 26/08/2026 18:48

Didion · 26/08/2026 18:21

Lighten up. You spoke incoherently and a joke was made about it.

No big deal.

Edited

It is a big deal when you are laughed at because of your speech difficulties caused by ND or disability.

ChristophersRobins · 26/08/2026 18:55

I do this lots and openly laugh at myself, which tends to mean people either ignore It or join in gently laughing with me. I did get unkind comments when I was younger (up to mid 20s) and had low self esteem and was very embarrassed by it. It says bad things about humanity that no one laughs now I'm not visibly embarrassed by it. Even I can see it's funny at times. Me and my manager sometimes both do it to each other and over the top of each other, which can take quite a bit if unpicking for anyone else there, though we're pretty good at getting each other's intention first time 😂.

It happens most often on the phone for me (because I hate phone conversations so I'm already nervy and jumping ahead in my thoughts). The laughing at myself seems to stop whichever bank, UC, whoever agent becoming brisk and irritated too.

It's definitely impolite to openly laugh at you if you weren't laughing though. Did it seem malicious, or just silly? Try to forget it and not spiral about. It's nothing to feel bad about, they're just a bit unkind and that's no reflection on you.

When I'm aware I'm too excited or worried to make sense (because it's every time my emotions are heightened really, so it's pretty predictable), I try to pause and consider what I want to say almost like an essay point, so I have it unjumbled, if it's important. I always have bullet pointed notes for important phone calls, for things likely to come up. Social situations and chit chat, I just expect people to deal with it and I accept I sometimes make no sense.

DS very successfully had SLT for this issue when he was small though it's definitely something he still actively has to try with, so if it's upsetting you lots, it's worth looking in to. Don't feel bad about it though, there's loads of us like it 💐.

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2026 19:03

Thank you ChristophersRobins.
All helpful advice.I thinks it's like my handwriting.
Hard to read but my family know what I mean.!!
Mostly I admit or laugh that I ramble or word vomit as a psychologist called it 40 years ago before we knew about ADHD.
It does make me not want to join in when people do the side glance or laugh.

OP posts:
whatisforteamum · 26/08/2026 19:04

Laughing seems to be the best option.

OP posts:
NotEnoughtGin · 26/08/2026 20:00

Tunaboona · 26/08/2026 18:04

Next time just say "oh I was just saying how you are all a bunch of cunts" and walk away with your best theme song in your head.

Well that's useless advice, unless you want op to be reported to HR!

I have a speech impediment and had years of speech therapy. In a professional setting I'm able to talking about how I speak and mostly used it as an excuse for my speech. If someone laughs at me for my speech, I can laugh it off and say that 'yes, I struggle with x, y, z because I was born with a speech impedimen.' Funny enough I'm member of SLT and I'm highly respected in my industry.

Talk to people, let them know if you have issues. Calling them 'a bunch of cunts' will either make you incredibly unpopular or unemployed

BeverleyBrooks · 26/08/2026 20:26

DD has ADHD and does this and I often have to ask her to repeat herself.
Put her in a room with a grandparent who is a bit deaf, and there’s no chance, ha! One talking at a rate of knots and one looking confused!

But we see it as part of her uniqueness. I guess in our family we all tease each other a bit for our quirks, we all have our funny ways and it’s nothing to be ashamed of. Life would be boring if everyone was normal. We are quite accepting of it all and I think it’s very easy to take offence at everything.

RoachFish · 26/08/2026 20:42

I think most people would just laugh at themselves if they say something silly, speak too quickly or accidentally hit a weird note. I think you probably have rejection sensitivity, super common when you have adhd, and that’s why you struggle to take it on the chin. What they were doing was just friendly banter, but you see it as them being critical of you.

Jimmyneutronsforehead · 26/08/2026 20:50

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2026 18:28

Fair enough that is a good way to handle it.
Personally I wouldn't laugh at someone's speech.
My DD had speech therapy and called it peach therapy.

That's absolutely adorable. Peach therapy.

My son has had 3 lots of speech therapy and some of the stuff he has come out with has been cute, adorable, or just a down right corker.

He asked my 73 year old grandmother for a bowl of penis once, he'd got teeny and peas all muddled together but the look on my nans face was priceless.

vincettenoir · 26/08/2026 21:03

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2026 19:03

Thank you ChristophersRobins.
All helpful advice.I thinks it's like my handwriting.
Hard to read but my family know what I mean.!!
Mostly I admit or laugh that I ramble or word vomit as a psychologist called it 40 years ago before we knew about ADHD.
It does make me not want to join in when people do the side glance or laugh.

It would be a shame to not join in. I understand that the incident that you have mentioned was embarrassing. But I’m sure not all your interactions with colleagues are like that.

Many workplaces are full of people who are very different in age/temperament/backgrounds and it’s not always easy to connect with everyone.

I think you need more forgiveness and acceptance of yourself, your contributions are valid even if they are occasionally a bit rambling. And it would also help to foster some forgiveness and understanding for the colleagues who couldn’t follow what you were saying and made a joke of it. I’m sure they are not altogether bad, even if they could have reacted more sensitively.

vincettenoir · 26/08/2026 21:05

Btw if you are considering treatments wouldn’t Adhd meds be more effective than speech therapy? That’s what I understood - I may be wrong.

Sherararara · 26/08/2026 21:05

Lighten up. Own it. Laugh and say “Sorry that didn’t make any sense did it? Let me try again…”

suki1964 · 26/08/2026 21:37

whatisforteamum · 26/08/2026 19:03

Thank you ChristophersRobins.
All helpful advice.I thinks it's like my handwriting.
Hard to read but my family know what I mean.!!
Mostly I admit or laugh that I ramble or word vomit as a psychologist called it 40 years ago before we knew about ADHD.
It does make me not want to join in when people do the side glance or laugh.

This was so me - until recently - the getting upset and confused bit I mean

Im in my 60's now and am still getting diagnoses - last one was APD ( hearing Dyslexia ) and whilst I dont get treatment or anything, for my long list of isms , being given diagnoses has totally freed me

Im very very lucky right now that I work for a small family business who have plenty of ND family members so Im treated as me. We tend to joke about all our quirks and banter around ourselves

Im totally accepted for my quirks and because of that, Im never second guessing anyone or anything. Being comfortable in my work place has also made my social life so much easier

If only it was all recognised in the 70's, my younger years would have been so much easier

whatisforteamum · 27/08/2026 19:17

Suki1964 so pleased your diagnosis gave you answers 😁

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