Why can't I use chopsticks?

[Brightonrockkk]

I enjoy Japanese food and eat a lot of it. However I cannot get chopsticks at all. In my effort to learn I have...
Sat with DH who can use them, and practiced
Sat watching YouTube videos practising for ages
Bought one of the childrens starter pairs attached at the top with rubber
....but still, everytime I pick them up it's like my first time! This has been going on years. I don't have any other fine motor skills issues.
Is it possible we all just as humans have one particular thing we cannot do, despite genuine effort and a lot of trying?

Because they are bloody hard to use.

there are several different techniques. Maybe try a different one?

I’m the same. I’ve tried over the years and my brain just cannot fathom it. Same with crocheting!

There are multiple ways to use chopsticks. I imagine there must be videos on youtube, there might be a style that suits you better.

I use the Japanese way, my DH holds his the Chinese way, I find Chinese style more difficult.

One of his cousins uses them with a clenched fist which surprised me when I first saw it, but she manages to eat whole meals like that.

Another trick that helps is if you eat family style you would have a rice bowl so you can pick up whatever you choose (sometimes with a communal spoon) and quickly transfer it to your rice bowl, then bring the bowl up to your mouth so you hold the food in the chopsticks for less time.

Also if you are making the food yourself, think about how to prepare each bite to make it easier to pick up. Chinese cuisine has advice about how to cut various things with this in mind eg cut spring onions into "horse ear" shapes.

Or if it's sushi, fingers are acceptable.

What about trying using your other hand or more practice?

I gave up years ago. I’ve made peace with it 🙏

Maybe try holding them nearer the pointy food end and hold your hand so they are horizontal and not one above the other. Then if all else fails, you can hold them stiff with the points touching to form a triangle and use them as a scoop.

Ah, also some chopsticks are easier to use than others. Disposable chopsticks are normally way too short for adult hands and some chopsticks are too slippery and have a useless tip.

My favourite chopsticks are the cheap cream coloured melamine ones with square tips and for cooking extra long bamboo ones with grooves at the tip
I've got fancy carved wood ones but they are too slippery for me and so are the Korean metal ones.

I think its something you have to start early. My husbands family are big on Chinese food and they can all use chopsticks, his Mum learnt as child because her parents were good friends with a Chinese family and used to have dinner with them regularly and his Dad learnt while living in Singapore when he was in the Navy, they taught him from a young age. Its a great source of amusement for them that I can't do it and some friends bought me a pair of training chopsticks.

Anyway there was the food programme on radio 4 the other day called fork and knife. It had a Japanese(?) man on it saying that they learn in stages so as kids the hold closer to the tip and as they get better they move their hands up towards the top. We bought Rookie Stix for my kids to eat with, they can all use chopsticks.

I can't either. Luckily it's not a required life skill!