@Br1ll1ant has it.
I think childhood is the core of whom we are. Our childhood is the heartwood - when it's sound, we've got a really solid basis for living and can look outward, secure and almost unaware of this central strength that's grown up over the past years.
When somethings gone badly wrong, out heartwood is weakened and even cracked. It influences us. Some people are less aware, some more, but either way it does influence us.
And many of us long with an almost physical pain for the living family that, had we had one, would have given us a good basis to grow up with and look outwards.
What you're feeling is natural. It doesn't mean that you are wrong; it means that you grew up without the vital nutrients and nourishment that makes your heartwood strong.
Ive never found a bandage for it, I'm afraid, only possible tips. Grounding yourself in the present moment by literally trying to feel your feet on the ground can help a bit. Some people find that imagining the child they were and holding her helps, though it doesn't work for me.
Being aware of your blessings does help too. It doesn't take awake the aching pain, but it does help balance it out. Some people, but not all, find therapy helps. Some people find their own children very healing, though you can't have children just for that reason, it's very hit and miss; it sharpens the pain for others.
Time and age (sorry) and experience can help you learn to live with it too.
[Flowers]