Anyone else struggling right now? (Parenting and money worries?)

[Cantworkitoutatall]

I just feel like I'm burning the candle at both ends. DC are young (4 and 7) and lovely but ever so much work these days, and I find I'm shoutier than I'd like to be. My work is busy and I need to work more (we are stretched financially) but can't take on more due to caring responsibilities. DH and I don't have much time for each other and I worry we will slip into a sort of platonic co-parenting relatioship. I love him and am attracted to him, but I'm constatnly worried about money (historically we'd have middle class salaries but these days we're counting down the days until our next pay cheques, despite living very modestly. We've had zero date nights this year, and managed only 1-2 last year. My mum died two years ago and it still feels very fresh.

Can anyone else relate? Everyone around me seems to have a bit better situation, whether financial or logistic support from parents/family, and it just feels like I'm in a sinking boat these days. Will it ever get easier or feel more manageable?

I’m in a similar boat. We have a 2 and 10 year old. I’m counting down the days until the older one doesn’t need wrap around care and the younger one is out of nursery. The cost of living rises are crippling.

My mum died before my kids were born, and I struggle with jealousy around friends with involved mums/grandparents. My in laws and dad love my kids (which is amazing) but my god I would have loved someone to swoop in and offer to watch the kids for a few hours. That was very hard when they were babies. My mum would have offered that.

With the big age gap I did regain quite a bit of independence back between them, so try to remember it will come back to you eventually. Life does just gradually get easier. I fought very very hard for a long time to conceive my youngest, but it’s fine to allowed that young kids are hard work. I love mine to pieces, but I’m not a particularly patient mother! It’s hard to not want to wish the time away, and then there’s the guilt for even thinking about it. There are absolutely lots of beautiful moments each day, but there are also plenty of hard moments too.

hang in there.

Stick the cartoons on for an hour on Sunday for …. Sunday sex!!

It’s a relief to see that someone else gets it. I have a similar age gap between mine and I find myself sometime wishing my youngest would hurry up and get a bit older so things are easier with us but also so we don’t miss that window with the oldest before he’s off doing his own thing.

i find myself missing the days when we only had the one. When we could be spontaneous and take off for the day or weekend and not plan it around naps and bedtime and resent almost having had to start all over again.

i fought hard for my second too and god i love her so much but there are moments when i wish things would just get a bit easier.

the easiest thing would be for the oldest one to pause while the younger one catches up a bit - if only 🤣