Did you ever get weird vibes from someone and couldn’t explain why?

[Queequeck]

I probably sound totally insane, but I’m hoping that there are others like me so I don’t feel like a total freak.
I have one colleague in my team direct team who somehow gives me the creeps. He hasn’t done anything specific, or made crude comments, or anything but I just can’t help feeling that something is off. I know that this sounds mad because I can’t even explain why, and this is driving me nuts.
It really got to me today and it made me wonder if there is something wrong with me or if other people get these vibes too and if they ever found out what caused their reactions.
I passively commented on it today to someone and I feel like I’ve made a big mistake because I can’t even explain my reasoning and I should have kept my mouth shut but what’s done is done.

I’ve had this my entire life and never understood it fully. I just assumed that everyone could feel or see what was painfully obvious to me.
My intuition is my strongest asset and it has kept my children safe from “friendly neighbours”.

Yes I agree there is that too sadly.

Just make sure you don’t act on unevidenced feelings. That’s how we get witch hunts and scapegoats. And the demonisation of non NT people. And think of all the “I can just tell” people at every police press conference after an appalling crime….
Remember-guts are excellent at processing food. Brains are excellent at processing facts.

Yep, I always trust my gut. I always despised a friend’s husband, he of course came across as lovely, kind and a great laugh. No one understood my dislike of him, he is now in prison for attempted murder of said friend.

I think everyone gets weird vibes from someone occasionally; I certainly do.

Sometimes it means there is actually something wrong. Mostly it doesn’t. Mostly it’s just that someone’s awkward or just not your kind of person. Also there’s a ton of unconscious irrational biases we all have (yes, all) that feed into how we feel about people.

Sure, sometimes we’ll be right, but nobody’s going to come on a thread like this and say “I got weird vibes from someone but he was actually fine”, as it’s much more interesting to say “I got weird vibes from a man who blinked too many times on a bus and the next day he ate a child and killed four pensioners with a crossbow, always trust your gut, hun xx”.

I also know someone who ‘trusts her gut’. As she gets ‘weird vibes’ from everyone who isn’t a blood relation, I take that with a pinch of salt. Strangely the only non-relatives she got no weird vibes from in the last 20 years were two men who were very obviously - to everyone else - dodgy as fuck.

Weird vibes for sure.
Yes even more so now days.
Like the reel of pwople acting as if they are real animals...thats mental tho.

I don't tend to get these type of gut feelings, so it's hard for me to understand. Of course I am drawn to some people more than others as we all are but that's not a negative reflection on those I'm not drawn to. For those that have this strong intuition, I'm wondering how often are you correct relative to how often you get the feeling? Maybe you are giving an example here of when you were proven right but how often did you right someone off for absolutely no good reason? Genuinely curious

*write

I've told this story on here before and I don't know whether it is my being ADHD or whether my intuition is just 'wrong', but...

I have, on a few occasions, met people I have immediately taken against. No reason, just seeing them made me bristle with antipathy, like an instinctive reaction.

Three of those people have gone on to become among my closest friends. I have no idea why I took against them so strongly on first acquaintance, none at all. Something in the way they looked or behaved must have made me defensive. But I can now say they are the loveliest of people, and two of them I have now been friends with for more than thirty years so I doubt anything dreadful is yet to emerge about them.

Sometimes we remember those we took against who subsequently went on to be proved 'wrong 'uns' and forget those we disliked who didn't.

I dislike some people immediately but rarely feel creeped out by them.
I read somewhere (could be bollocks) that 10% of people have psychopathic characteristics. Perhaps we're picking up on ultra-subtle micro expressions and gestures which indicate this.?

Yes not very often but it does happen and I think it's important to trust that instinct.

My adult DD was in hospital last year and a guy arrived in the bay to take her for a scan .. she was in a wheelchair. There was something about him that really alarmed me, and I'm not sure why as appearance wise he was fine. I insisted that I went with them. Later on DD said the same.

Yes a female neighbour of then bf (now DH) she was always fake friendly but grilled me constantly about how many children I wanted, surely I would prefer girls etc. since then she made it clear she literally hated me but bombarded our DC with gifts and was overly “nice”, constantly watching out her window etc. I told DH she’s creepy and was brushed off. Turns out I was right she has been watching them with binoculars, climbing walls and watching another neighbour’s daughter too. Literally caught in our gardens etc peering in windows at their bedroom windows. Police will do nothing because she’s a “Christian woman”.

Yes, I've felt this way about a couple of people. People who acted very warm and friendly and were well liked. As I got to know them both more it came to light they were very manipulative people. They were work situations were I couldn't really get away from them. I've come across people who give me that vibe in social settings too and just kept my distance so I don't know if I was right about all of them.

I sometimes get the gut feeling- sometimes people I actually know, other times total strangers, but something is telling me to back off.

I had a work colleague who never gave me any trouble; she was always polite, was an excellent worker, etc., but there was always something about her that made my flesh crawl, but I could never work out what!

Then there are the others that knowingly or unknowingly drain my energy, twiddle with my thoughts in a bad way, upset my system - psychic vampires -

I feel less crazy reading this.
Yes I think that he might always be watching everyone a little too intense whilst somehow not giving away anything about himself.
Anyway, I’ll just continue to avoid direct interactions where possible.

Yes, I was 10. He was in a band. Looking at him made my stomach turn.

He was outed as a peadophile many years later.

However I do agree that sometimes the ‘gut feeling’ is actually indicating a difference from you not necessarily a badness. Neurodivergent people sometimes trigger this response in neurotypical and they obviously haven’t done anything wrong… they’re just not making the same micro expressions and social contract moves that NTs do automatically and the NT brain then says ‘danger, this person is acting off’.

I was going to write this- I passed a man on the street and what I could feel was otherworldly. It was like he just radiated evil, like a force pushing me away. I’ve never felt that before or since. Anyway, later that day he pushed someone under a bus and killed them.

Yes many years ago at a party, there was a doorman who made my skin crawl, everyone else thought he was perfectly nice and polite. Was Levi belfield.

Yes and ive told the story before on here but turns out he was a registered sex offender and was placing himself in a position to be around kids when his license specifically said he couldn't. If it hadnt been for that gut feeling he could have been around my own Daughter and Niece and Nephew a lot.

OMG

I’ve met 3 paedophiles (obviously at that point they hadn’t been convicted), and had no idea, so it’s a no from me.

Also important to remeber how often we get a “feeling” about a perfectly innocent person. And how often we don’t get a feeling about a person who is guilty as hell. We tend not to remember those cases.

😱

Slightly different, less intense versions for me.

There was a boy at school with me who was genuinely a good friend. He had a little crush on me at various times but I found him physically repulsive. A really good, and genuine friend, but even just normal teenage hugging etc would completely turn me off. I didn't see hin for a few years whie at uni and when I saw him again, I was surprised to discover that I was simulataneously thrilled to see him, and hated the hug. As an adult, I have a theory that genetically we're not compatible and on some level my body wanted to make sure that we never procreated!

Another one was exBIL. I never really liked him. I always felt bad about it because I thought I was being a snob on some instinctive level. But it turns out I was right. He's a bad person with significant issues who has brought nothing but drama and chaos to SIL's life (and ours, for that matter). And now I think about it more logically, I've never been snobby about anyone else so why did I allow myself to be convinced I was snobby about him.

More worringly, in person, their DS is a difficult child, yes and so it's not weird we all struggle with him. But I find whenever I see a picture of him on social media or the family whatsapp group, I have an almost instinctive recoil reaction and it worries me.