It all kicked off in the swimming pool

[Poppystone]

Session times have changed because of the school holidays. There's no lane swimming during the day, only general swimming, which is making the early morning and evening swimming very busy.

My friend is a big man, well over six ft (ie takes up a lot of space) and a very good swimmer. He's gone into the fast lane and done his thing. There were two women also there swimming much too slowly for the fast lane. The target times for a length are published, so fast is not subjective, although they didn't appear to be aware of this.

Anyway they've objected and said they think he's very rude to be ploughing up and down. He thinks that's what the fast lane's for....

You lost me here. He purposely knocked / touched / kicked them because he couldn't be bothered to contain his entitlement frustration? Wow! They're right, he is an arsehole.

It's very interesting to see the way big men act.

He's another man using his big manliness to physically push women out of their space - I see it often at my pool. It's like the ones who simply can't close their legs and take up less room on the train or in a waiting room because they have such huge bollocks - he simply can't swim any slower because he is such a fast, manly swimmer and everyone has to budge up for him. I can well imagine he was behaving like an arsehole, and good on those women who stood up to him.

I was in the medium lane doing lengths in 30 seconds -, stopping at each end to let a faster woman through and getting my breath back, because the slow lane contained too many swimmers, swimming 2 abreast having a nice chat.

Well, I've just learnt I'm a slow swimmer! Gutted. 🤣

Unless they swim at a national competitive level, most ordinary women will not swim as fast as a man. Basic biology.

Which is why the lanes are categorised by swimming speed. The 'fast lanes' are for fast swimmers. The two women were not fast swimmers and therefore should have used the lanes which are designated for swimmers of their speed. Christ alive, it's not fucking complicated.

He should have politely said 'Sorry, this lane's for swimmers who swim faster - would you mind moving to a slower lane or we'll keep bumping into each other?' rather than jostling past them and storming off. But he shouldn't have to swim slowly in a fast lane just because two slow swimmers have decided to hog it instead of using the lane that's meant for them. This would apply whether the slow swimmers were male or female.

What is it about being A Big Man that prevented your friend asking the lifeguard to enforce the pool rules? Just because his size makes it physically possible to try and enforce them in his own way, doesn't make it right.
My sons and partner are all Big Men. They have never spoken of negative reactions to them based on their physicality. In our society being 'big' is seen as an asset to a man.
I think its more likely they were responding to your friend not doing the obvious to resolve the situation, rather than to his size. I don't think Big Men are in danger of becoming an oppressed minority any time soon.

Well, as I said previously, it does depend on the age of the people and time of day. The lane session straight after the over 60 aqua aerobics had a lot of slow swimmers who were in the medium lane.

If he physically barged into them then yes hes being completely unreasonable. His frustration doesn't give him the right to barge into people

Being a big man doesn't prevent you from using your words politely, or having a chat with the lifegaurd. It doesnt make the words coming out of your mouth aggressive.

It sounds like the pool was very busy so whilst these women may have been in the wrong lane, its a public pool in the school holidays and hes just going to have to accept he can't always swim as fast as he wants.

There was nearly an actual fight about this in our pool between two men the other week - some shouting and stand-up shoving before a life guard intervened. The breastroker had got in the slow lane and was outraged at the freestyler overtaking them. It was the talk of the showers!!

My opinion is ladies were in the wrong - pick the right lane and if there's no signs use your eyes/common sense to figure it out.

I saw a funny incident like this a year or so ago in our local pool. My DP was in the slow lane swimming along with his little pot belly. 😂I was at the side sitting watching. The fast lane was nearest me. Suddenly I'm aware of all this splashing everywhere and this bald guy with goggles is speeding along getting redder and redder. Right in front of me he encounters slower swimming ladies and starts shouting "F C*s" at the top of his voice. He does about 2 lengths like this, then gets out and takes his goggles off and throws them violently to the floor while looking like he might actually explode. He reminded me of the kid in the Roald Dahl story that blows up like a blueberry . A couple of ppl go over to the lifeguard pointing at the man , and the guard then goes over to the great exploding fruit and tells him to get out of the building. And I think a few years before that I was in a swimming pool and some other unpleasant incident happened, though I cant recollect what it was. Let's just say DP and I dont go to the swimming pool any more. I think swimming pools are a hotbed of evil behaviour. They bring out the worst in ppl. Maybe it's the fumes from the chlorine. 🤣

I did but the other two women got out 😔 He didn’t say a word when I spoke to him, just a kind of huffing sound, then shot off again. So I spoke to the lifeguard who tried to speak to him, but the man didn’t stop. He ploughed on doing a few more lengths then got out. He was an utter twat.

I agree that the pool are partly at fault for reducing the lane sessions. It's a bit crap to punish the people who effectively help them keep the lights on year round solely because they can make a bit more money from families. Surely 1hr extra lane swimming at lunchtime would be fairer if the majority of the rest of the day is open swimming?

Either way, im with your friend. If the other people are swimming slower than him they have a medium lane to go in even if there wasnt specific times. The fact that there were means they shouldn't have even been in that lane in the first place if they cant swim to the correct standard. So arrogant of them to assume they know better even that the actual lifeguard!

Also very weird that people were getting you involved in any of it!

To be honest public sessions are a mine field,I find, as you have to be super mindful of other swimmers who are just there for a gentle potter.

In the swimming club we used to have 6 people in a narrow lane and no one got in each others way or crash and we'd be hammering up and down for up to two hours. And no one would get upset by things. It was the swimmer in fronts job to pause in the middle of their turn to let the one behind past, then slot in behind. But generally all 6 people in your lane will be the same speed within a couple of seconds per hundred.

In a public session you have literally no idea what people will do, they will set off slowly as you come in for your turn, or wait in the middle of the lane at the end of the pool. The worst one is when they wait in the corner, then at the moment you lose sight of them during the turn they slide across the end of the lane! I've had a couple of accidents that way so now I really can't do a proper turn if someone's there.

On the other side, they would see me as barreling down the lane intimidating everyone, even when I'm keeping in my area.

I think at the end of the day public sessions aren't for club standard swimmers, the level of consideration needed means it's not worth swimming unless it's very quiet, and it puts off the non club swimmers who want to use the pool too.

The op says there are clearly published speeds
for the fast lane and these women did not meet them, so this is not a case of an entitled arrogant man claiming other people’s space. This is a man swimming having his space claimed. He has as much right to it as a woman.

Target speeds - so while it's ideal for people to swim at that speed I presume that it's somewhat flexible depending on the speed of the many other swimmers in a very busy pool. Anyone who can't understand the need to adjust their speed during a busy holiday period is an idiot - we'd all love a clear run at a lane but it doesn't always happen.

So two women were occupying the fast lane to dog paddle and chat while a fast swimmer swam fast and inconvenienced them?

just how it is today unfortunately. Selfish inconsiderate people making life difficult for the people who play by the rules

In our pool the slow lady breast stroke swimmers like me usually potter up and down the 'general swim' half of the pool. But now that that is full of babies, toddlers, divebombing teens and people standing in the water chatting we have had to brave the Slow Lane in the lane swimming part of the pool

Yesterday a 30-something guy charged up and down the slow lane, cutting us up, splashing, etc etc. The Medium and Fast lanes had hardly anyone in them. He was the only male person in the slow lane.

I wanted to torpedo him.

I mentioned this in another thread, but I was doing an aqua class - most of the lanes were being used for this. A man just got into one of the lanes, which had about 8 elderly ladies in it, doing the aqua class, and started swimming, forcing them out of his way.

The thing about swimming pools is that they are a limited space, used for all sorts of activities - lessons, family splash, aqua classes, triathlon training, swimming clubs, lifeguard classes, mum and baby sessions. It IS annoying if you turn up wanting to swim and aren't able to get exactly what you want. Even lane swimming isn't going to fit everyone - imagine if Michael Phelps turned up and told everyone in the fast lane they were too slow so move!

Crikey, I hope the person leading the aqua class told man to get out. Did he not realise it was a class? Surely after the initial moving out the way to let him through, the class participants didn't allow him to keep swimming.

In our pool if you meet the speed for the lane you can stay, it's doesn't get elevated to Olympic standard cos someone better gets in. They just have to accept it's a public swim and the lane speeds have been set to accommodate most of the public.
Mostly, people are not dicks and so there is some flexibility e.g. if someone is a little slow for the fast lane, but the middle lane is really crowded, and they are following etiquette by letting faster swimmers by then they'll be welcome in the fast lane. It's about communication and sharing the same space.

Did the life guard tell him to get out?

I think he knew it was a class - the loud music, the instructor shouting from the side etc. He was just angry. He got out at the other end.

I came thinking this was going to be a Benidorm style pool punch up. I'm leaving disappointed ☹️

Angry bcos people do classes
what a horrible man

@Poppystone your friend should be careful in a public pool even if some are in the wrong lane best tell them not bang into them

After reading that I can see why they were upset.

Exactly this. Surely if 30 people are there who swim 45seconds, 1 at 25 and 1 at 55, then the 45seconders are gonna have to spread out a bit