What did you observe at a wedding that made you think: "This couple will...."?

[timoteigirl]

"will or won't stay together for long"?
I'll start. I was in the toilet cubicles and the bride rushed in with a female friend and was discussing all the times she and groom had split up and got back together, ruminating on what actually keeps them together. I knew the groom, not the bride and this made me think they wouldn't last. But I was wrong. They have.

I went to a lavish wedding years ago where they had both been married and divorced before with teen children each.
All went well until groom’s speech when he said how touched he was about a certain special person in his life looking so lovely and happy and that it made his day complete etc etc with genuine tears in his eyes , he went on like this for a good ten minutes.
Bride and rest of table were filling up with emotions until he said he had got a gift for his special women in his life …. And headed towards his mortified teenage daughter to hand her a jewellery box… to make it even more cringe he went down on one knee , opened the box and tried to get the poor girl to put the ring on !
Wasn’t surprised when they split a few months later!

It was the groom’s second marriage and he was more than ten years older than the bride. His speech included an unflattering account of the first time they met. Apparently, the bride was wearing scruffy clothes and no make-up, but the groom was able to look beyond this.

Then the best man (who was the groom’s eldest son) gave a speech that suggested he wasn’t very impressed with his dad’s new girlfriend at first, but grew to like her.

The underlying message seemed to be that the bride was lucky to be marrying the groom.

They split up after about 13 years.

Yes, I think it’s important not to let confirmation bias make you forget the times you were wrong. At one friend’s wedding, we were all unable to forget the comic nickname she’d used for him after their first date or two, and how completely uninterested she’d been — no clue why she’d even had a second date. But a traumatic event happened, he was very kind and involved during her lengthy recuperation, and they married. I gave it a year, because they seemed completely unsuited, she was way out of his league, and it would never have happened had she not almost died, and someone being kind in a traumatic situation isn’t a great basis. But they’re still married nearly 20 years on.

I have been to two weddings where the groom basically ignored his new wife and spent all his time chatting to his friends instead. One of them divorced a few years later - he cheated - and one of the weddings was only a few months ago, so we shall see.

In my experience the more money spent on the wedding the shorter the marriage. One of the best weddings was on a shoe string with guests bringing a dish and wine but the love in the community around the couple was palpable and it was so obvious that it would be a successful marriage!

The groom and father of the bride both forgot to compliment the bride and bridesmaids on how they looked. Better still, at another wedding the groom was snogging one of the bridesmaids on the stairs.

I went to a wedding where the bride was 45 minutes late.
I was a work colleague of hers and knew that the groom was emotionally abusive to her- she'd confided in me a few times, and then suddenly they were engaged and planning a big family wedding within weeks. (She wasn't pregnant).
When she was so late to the church, I was secretly hoping she'd seen the light and changed her mind. I was sure they wouldn't last but they are still together 15 years later. I'm not close with her anymore, I do hope he changed his ways and made her happy.

Two but only one divorced.

Groom's speech spoke about his family, friends, his boss, his sports team and mainly himself. He didn't say one word about his wife...not a single word. Since divorced and she's met someone lovely.

Second one. Relationship since their teens, on and off at least twice a year every year. Their families were really close. He'd break it off, she wpuld show up at his work in tears, and them she'd ring his mother and they would get back together. Wedding night she went to bed and he spent the night in the bar with his friends.

The weddng photos are weird - she looks so happy & he looks miserable. They are still together but I don't see them often so no idea what the relationship is like.

The one in the 80s where there were three days of events and the bride's father was calling it The Wedding of the Year. Doomed.

The one where I could tell from the groom's behaviour that he considered himself better looking than the bride and she was lucky to be marrying him. Still together but he had an affair.

The one where the bride got in touch with neglected relatives because she wanted the pictures to show her being walked down the aisle with her father and a picture perfect flower girl. Lasted 18 months.

It's not an urban myth about writing help on the soles of the groom's shoes. My husbands best man did it , when we knelt at the altar we heard an audible gasp and then lots of stifled laughter. He also put all the clocks and watches forward an hour when he was in the shower so he thought he was running late.
We have been married 39 years and his best man is still his best friend

Quite a few years ago I saw a newly married couple leave a city centre cathedral and walk across the pedestrianised square , They seemed oblivious to everything except each other. I'd like to think that they are still happy together.
It look about 10 minutes for anyone else to emerge from the church.

For my friends who have divorced I didn't spot anything "off" at their wedding.

I didn't think though my friends would still be together 20 odd years after having a baby very early on in the relationship, but they are.

I saw that on shoes when I was in the choir as a kid. I presumed it was a joke by the best man.

The help thing is a horrible joke :(

This couple are still together, but at their wedding the groom basically treated it as a piss up with his mates. Aside from the meal and the photos the bride and groom were barely around each other. I secretly thought then that it wasn’t a good sign.

Some people are not glued to their partners though ! Maybe that’s more healthy than having to be together joined at the hips. Depends on the vibe they give out I suppose!

I know someone who has had 3 weddings to the same man and as it turns out none of them were legal marriages. She wants to be married; he has a ‘crazy ex wife who took him to the cleaners’ - supposedly 🙄 - so refuses to marry her. But they keep planning these big weddings, I think, in the hope that this time he’ll finally want to get married. They never actually do the formal legal bit, so three weddings (!!) later, they still aren’t married. They’re still together though, which I guess is more than I can say for some friends I know who only had one actual proper wedding. 😂

Harry and Meghan. I said I’d give it five years.
Instead we’ve had 15(?) years of mayhem…

A nice one. They both came from different countries, but honoured both sets of traditions, and both were so friendly to each other's friends and family you just knew it was going to last. Waiting for an invitation to their big anniversary!

It was the late 70s and my parents were dating in London. My dad earned £4500 per annum and got offered a job in Glasgow for £6000 per annum. My mum was training as a midwife at the time and the only way she could move with him and go straight into second year without having to repeat first year was if her husband changed jobs. They arranged the wedding in six weeks and will have been married 47 years later this month.

A wedding DH went to before we met was that of a work colleague. The wedding seemed to go fine however one of the men in the grooms party let slip that the groom had been having an affair for months. The bride spent most of the after party in the bathroom in floods of tears. However by the following morning it had come out that the bride had been enjoying playing away too. The wedding paperwork was never handed into the registry office so the marriage was never legally registered.

I went to a wedding of my cousin and he didnt let go of the bride's hand through out - adorably so. She was so precious to him. They are still together a decade on and seem so happy.

I went to another where tons went wrong (marquee blew down, orders of service got locked in a car with the car keys, the caterer had a heart attack; all in one day!). This was a year ago. I hope and pray it wasn't an omen!

DH and I eloped. We had a lovely day, still going 4 years on!

In retrospect, I suspect Dh’s family was probably a little bit horrified at our impending marriage, though they are very polite and probably too polite to have ever said anything.

There is a 7 year age gap, I’m older, was 28 when I met Dh who was 21 and in his second to last year at uni. 🙈 We were long distance for much of the time we were dating, opposite sides of the world, though we travelled to see each other probably 4x a year. We got married 3 years after we met, when Dh was only 24, didn’t even live together until a few months before the wedding when I finally got a visa to move to the UK. I come from an English speaking but quite different culture.

I’m sure there must have been bets on how long it would last. 😂 18 years later, still very happily married. I would also be horrified if my 21 year old came back from abroad and announced he’d met a girl and was going to marry her as soon as he could get her a visa to move to the UK.

A friend was constantly arguing with her partner, this went on for years, her saying she was thinking of leaving him etc etc. Anyway, they had this huge (expensive 🙈) wedding In his speech, he briefly mentioned her once. He talked about himself, their kids, he went on and on about their daughter in particular, but not the bride. It was weird and awful. Split a year or so later - not a surprise!

Choccy , omg ! Sounds a disaster of a day

A friend of ours, so downtrodden by the girlfriend, agreed to get married after she admittedly forgot to take the pill. His face on the day of the wedding., my god.

I suspect he'll hold out until the day their dd hits 18 or tells him to chuck her.

Not one single person likes her, and she tried to fuck him over by booking their family holiday for Friday, it was his sisters wedding the Saturday. Apparently she was raging that he said eh no me and dd will fly out Sunday. That's how nasty and self centred she is.