Neurodivergent 15 year old - looksmaxxing and restrictive eating.

[Blueberry2026]

My 15 year old son (who has constitutional delayed puberty so is only 5 foot 2) started of restricting his eating a while ago and would only eat ‘clean’ foods. Which was fine… however it then progressed to restricted eating and obsession about food and his body image. He is on the waiting list for camhs for potential arfid, body dysmorphia and ocd. Things have escalated this last week. Yesterday I saw he had bruises all around his jaw and he said that he had been hitting his jaw with his phone because it’s fun and seemed quite embarrased. After speaking to others and then my son it turns out that he was trying to hard maxx? (Never heard of it until then). He’s basically been hitting his jaw in an effort to cause fractures to get a good jaw. I don’t really know what to do about it. He’s a very young immature 15 year old.
Anyone have any experience of this?

No experience but solidarity with you, how stressful.

Can you install an app on his phone to see what he is watching on tiktok?

I've never heard of that, but did all sorts of stupid shit to be hot 🥺 x

I had never heard of it until recently either.
I mean hurting yourself and striking your jaw to cause fractures seems extreme, but it seems like it’s a thing. I am really worried though regardless.

These trends are so dangerous. I saw a story online about a lad taking cancer meds in the hope it would make him grow taller. He was having awful side effects. All in the name of this looksmaxxing.

God sorry to hear that, what a horrible trend

If he has diagnosed delayed puberty then does he see an endocrinologist? Could you get the endocrinologist to talk to him about it - in particular that eating normally and healthily is very important to fuel growth.

Have you checked his phone history - google searches, youtube viewing history etc? I’d be wondering what on earth he is watching and tbh I’d be considering only allowing him the phone under supervision if I thought he was watching really harmful stuff. I have younger kids though so perhaps that’s easy to say.

Take away online access.
Is he being seen/treated for his delayed puberty (assuming this is outside the norm vs late bloomer).

That is what I originally did ( restricted online content) but camhs said to not do that right now

He has been diagnosed with constititional delay of puberty. But that is a guess. And he’s very aware of his grandparent and uncle being 5 foot 7 fully grown. Which is fine.:. But to sam it isn’t fine and he’s messing over ot

How do I take online access away from a child whos whole routine on it

What routine? I would take him off his phone entirely md tell him its for his own safety. The get him to do his school work online in front of you. I have taken my teens screens away for a variety of reasons over the years and it has always been a good thing in the long run.
His Internet access is causing damage to his mental and physical health. Why let him have it?!

Take the phone off him!

I’ve be taken it away he’s not the happiest but we will deal with that tomorrow

disable the router, take away the cell phone/ipad etc. just go about the day the same way you would if the power was off, yes it inconveniences everyone. go spend the day in the park.
not eating will not help his body grow, he needs good foods including healthy fats.
you need to see an endocrinologist that might help his confidence and maybe he needs medical help.

I’m sorry that must be a very difficult thing to deal with.

And I also understand how hard it is to take devices away from neurodivergent teens, so find it quite laughable whenever I read posts “ just take his phone away” as it’s that easy.

Hope you manage to get some support