Are my summer holiday plans rubbish

[Summerfunfinch]

So this is our first summer with my DNs who will be living with us for the foreseeable future.
The kids are 10, 6, 3 and the baby. Its been a busy few months with the kids moving here then joining schools etc so we decided to keep the summer low-key and give everyone a chance to reset plus factor in mine and DPs work schedules and the kids very different personalities.

I was describing my week to friends, and they were like oh so do you have more plans and when I explained that all the weeks will have roughly a similar plan, they kept making jokes about their kids being bored and bouncing off the walls begging for school.
One described them as old school and explained that people do more in the holidays these days. Looking at social media, it seems that people do a lot every day.

So now im thinking that our plans need something else an I'm hoping you can help me add some things in

I'm going to include some brief plans of a typical week so you can see what it looks like and make suggestions

Monday
I'm in work DP is at home with the kids.
6am- I get up with younger two give them a snack get them ready. DP does some work while im doing that.
8am- Then I go to work.
All kids have breakfast with DP
10 am (ish) DP helps older two get ready and takes them walking out somewhere in the village.
Either to one of the 3 parks or the library for the morning.
12pm- They go back home for lunch
Then the younger 2 go for a nap/quiet time. DP helps the older 2 either with homework, or they play learning games on their tablets.
2pm (ish) Then they do at home activities in the afternoon. DP is really into science so she got some experiment kits to do with them. They also have a paddling pool they were playing with as the weather is hot.
4pm Then DP starts dinner and the older 3 either play by themselves or help with dinner.
5pm I get home and we have dinner
6pm I bathe and put pjs on the younger 2. Older two can watch tv while DP does some work then they bathe and get pjs on while i read to younger 2 and put them to bed
7.30pm We play games with the older 2 sometimes board games sometimes console gaming.
8.15 6 year old has a story goes to bed, 10 year old reads for 30 mins then goes to sleep

Tuesday
DP is in work Im at home

6am- DP gets up with younger two give them a snack get them ready.
8am- Dp goes to work.
All kids have breakfast with me
9 am I help get older two get ready and drive to local swimming baths.
9.30am Older 2 have 1 to 1 swimming lessons I take the younger 2 in the baby pool area while they do this
10.30am get everyone showered and we have early lunch in the cafe
11.30am drive home
12pm- younger 2 go for a nap/quiet time. I help the older 2 either with homework, or they play learning games on their tablets.
2pm (ish) Then they do at home activities in the afternoon. Im more into baking and creative stuff so I tend to do that with them.
4pm (ish) Then I start dinner and the older 3 either play by themselves or help with dinner.
5pm DP gets home and we have dinner
6pm I bathe and put pjs on the younger 2. Older two can watch tv while DP does some work then they bathe and get pjs on while i read to younger 2 and put them to bed
7.30pm We play games with the older 2 sometimes board games sometimes console gaming.
8.15 6 year old has a story goes to bed, 10 year old reads for 30 mins then goes to sleep

Wednesday
DP an I are both off work
We have been making this day a 1 on 1 day for the older two. so week 1 we take 10 year old out just her. Week 2 we take 6 year old. Week 3 we take both. Week 4 the 10 year old, week 5 the 6 year old. And in the last week we might take the older 3 as a back to school/ starting nursery school treat.
DPs parents will look after the other DCS while we do this.
The kids have chosen the activities so we make sure its focused on them

Thursday
Is similar to monday except the younger two go to a childminder session in the morning for a few hours to get them used to it so DP drops them off and take the older two to a different park/ library than they went on Monday and they do a different activity in the afternoon.

Friday
Similar to Tuesday but I drop the younger 2 at the childminder first then take the older 2 to 1 to 1 swimming lessons.

Saturday
6am I get up with the younger 2 and DP gets a lie in
9am We all get ready and go somewhere for the day (local town, beach, farm park etc)
2/3pm (ish) we tend to get home we have some chill time kids read or play with toys
4pm we either order a takeaway or we have freezer/picky bits for tea depending on what we did during the day and watch a film while we eat
6pm DP puts younger 2 to bed. Older two can either stay home and read/ play or they can come to the supermarket with me
8pm I get home and older 2 go to bed

Sunday
6am Dp gets up with younger 2 I get a lie in
Then if we have no plans we have an at home pj day
Kids play with their toys/paddling pool /read whatever they want really
Dp and I try to alternate getting stuff ready for work and playing with the kids.
6pm Dp puts younger two to bed. Older 2 have a bath put clean Pjs on
7.30pm, we watch a film with the older 2, then they go to bed once it's over.

We have a couple of variations to this. The 6-year-old has a week of holiday club for an activity she like for one week so either DP or I will drop her there on our way to work.
6 year old will also see her dad every other sunday and 3 year old will see their family for a day a couple of times.
We also have a couple of play dates set up for the older two on a couple of the afternoons.

But we didn't plan to do anything more than this really. Holidays are really expensive so we couldnt afford to book one for the summer. But maybe we should have planned something else more exciting so the kids can have a bit more excitement. I dont want them going back to school and finding out that they had a rubbish summer.
I would really appreciate any tips or comments you have.

I think it sounds lovely. Nothing wrong with being chilled.

Don’t compare yourself to others- you are doing great!😊

That's sounds a very busy and nice schedule.
Are the children happy and enjoying it?
That's the important thing.

You sound very organised ❤️

That sounds like a really perfect calm summer for children who have experienced some big life changes recently.

If your DNs have just moved to your home, they need time to settle - and to help that happen, the quieter the better. we decided to keep the summer low-key and give everyone a chance to reset this sounds 💯 like the right course of action. Kids don't crave excitement, they need safety, security and comfort.

they kept making jokes about their kids being bored and bouncing off the walls begging for school.
One described them as old school and explained that people do more in the holidays these days. All of this is an expression of the other parents' insecurities.

Looking at social media, it seems that people do a lot every day. Social media is bullshit. There are millions of people having quiet, calm, nurturing summers.

Trust your instincts, you were right to keep it low key.

I think its a perfect balance. Especially after the upheaval they have had. Enjoy the holidays x

Sounds lovely

I thought it was all going to be activities at home and local pottering… which would still be fine but on the quiet side… but then I saw Weds and Sat look like bigger outings?

I’d probably take the older 2 out every Weds with a few Weds being all of them - but can imagine the 1:1 time may be valuable if they have been through difficult times. and that’s a minor difference anyway.

Sounds lovely , OP. I agree the children need a calm, settled time, which it sounds like you’re giving them

I worried about not doing enough with my daughter during the school holidays last year and it turned out she wanted some days just like you described. Sounds like a perfect way to get the children settled and into a routine before school starts in the autumn.

I think you are right to keep it low key and you're doing plenty it isn't just six weeks of TV!

The only suggestion I have is that it is worth investigating if there are any free activities you could do to replace some of the park / library sessions. One year a local council had a magic show for kids in the park every Friday - something like that, a bit different but not super demanding on anyone 😊

Sounds perfect. You have to let them all settle in and presumably they've had some upheaval moving in so may be emotional.

They need a safe space and doing too much, racing around just will be too hectic for them all. As you get further into the holidays there's no reason you can't adapt and add to it if you want to.

Always remember, comparison is the theif of joy so you do what you feel is right and never compare your plans to others 😊

Yes, it's nice.
Some of these "friends" are probably like the people on White Lotus-spend a fortune going to places just to be miserable! Doing creative activities as a family is great.

Love this OP sounds perfect. No need to over do anything … we’ve just had relatives stay for 4 nights everyone was asking what are we doing? The kids woke up when they wanted. played with toys and played board games. We went to the local park, went to the supermarket and got ice creams. We went for short walks (it’s been hot). It was lovely!!! Me and my sister in law got to talk and catch up and we all had quality time together!

Thank you for your comments so far youre all very kind.
To answer some questions. They seem to be enjoying it so far but its only been a week and a half so they might get bored later on.

One of the kids likes to know whats happening and we noticed when they started school that all the kids benefited from routine so we are trying to keep some organisation. To be honest, it also helps me if I know what's happening during the week.

We have looked into local free stuff but they only really have activities in the library where we are. The parks are pretty good though one is for older kids, one is mixed ages. One is smaller but it has a more empty green space so the 6 year old can play football. So we've got a good mix.

That sounds lovely. Mine are a similar age to the older two, and we typically frequent the library and swimming pool over the summer, along with playing in the garden, watching TV, reading, and
also some holiday club and the odd play date. We would usually do a camping trip or two as well, but TBH with the age range you have and them having just moved in with you I think your plans is really good.

Op this sounds fine , just remember the best laid plans can go arwy with DC!
As long as you can be flexible if they do...

It sounds absolutely lovely and suited to all the dc and you and your dh! Actually, it sounds like summer hols when i was young and i recreated it with my dc.

It might be worth imagining you are a tourist in your home town, and looking up things - like lovely quiet walks and a bit of blackberrying for the older ones,

Many fond memories myself of library with no rushing, meander home, home made lollies- we could design our own! And generally enjoying being with each other. And a paddling pool in the garden.

Ignore these friends. What is important is time to settle, get used to living together, love and time to listen. Youre doung everything right. Dont doubt yourself!

The Wednesday 1:1s will be a bit of a mix. The 10 year old likes chill time so we are doing more chill days with her involving the cinema and eating in 'proper' restaurants and going to the big library.
6 year old wants trampoline parks, playing football and McDonalds
But its their choice. One of their shared days, we will go to our closest city for shopping because they are both desperate to go as there are lots of shops that sell those blind boxes and bits of stuff that they love.
We haven't decided what to do on the final day yet, as we aren't 100% sure the 3-year-old will come, depending on when their family can visit.

Sounds fairly similar to what I did with my dc. I did used to take advantage of free activities at the city museum, and if the garden centre, the rspb reserve or whatever had something i would take advantage but we did a lot of local park visits, country park, making hide outs in the garden, baking. Also once they were 9&7 onwards once a week we went to the care home up the street to do a sing along (choristers, and my friend was the ents coordinator)

Young children don't need to go further than playgrounds, local woods and the library. It's the parents who get bored so arrange fancy outings.
It was in my case, anyway.
Sounds as though yours need to settle in and feel secure in their environment.

Sounds like a lovely, calm, nurturing holiday for you all.

My children are teens now but I can honestly say that what they appreciate the most is you spending time with them, not the expensive days out.

Oh and your ‘friends’ sound like bitchy twats.

You and your DP sound wonderful. This sounds like a perfect way to integrate the kids in to your life and vice versa. My DS used to love a charity shop haul! Once or twice in the summer he would get some money (£10) and could buy what he wanted from charity shops - he bought books, toys, DVDs .... it was a highlight and he would spend hours choosing!

That sounds lovely. You've put so much love and thought and planning into all of this.

If you want to consider adding a getaway we have done a couple of night camping either at a nearby campsite or just in the garden. BBQ, marshmallows. Or book a night in a cheap chain hotel near a beach or day out. This gives them something to talk about and the experience of going away without so much annual leave or expense. But I'm sure it's much more important to give them stability and routine.

For days out we used to brainstorm a big long list of options, divide them up by indoor/outdoor and near/far away and get everyone to pick their favourite things. It never ceased to amaze me how modest my children's priorities were - often swimming or buying an ice cream cone, that kind of thing, so easy to fit in, but when it's something they have picked out it feels so much more special to them. We'd use everyone's favourites to make a shortlist, add a couple of extra bits like a uniform shopping day & completing the library reading challenge, and tick things off until the list was all compete by the end of the hols. You can add really simple and cheap things in, it doesn't all need to be big ticket stuff at all. But if one of them desperately wants to go to Disney or fly to the moon then put it on the long list, consider it semi-seriously alongside everything else and decide that on balance, not this time.

Another random tip, school uniform and shoes are a bit easier if you don't leave them right to the end of the hols. Order name labels ready for Sept if you don't already have them. I like Stikins, they work on lunchboxes and clothes.

And try not to burn yourselves out. Don't spend Sun getting ready for work, try to build something into the routine that you can do together and both look forward to.